I think today is the day i make a change,
For if i don't ill lose everything

There was a time when you and I had not seen ourselves in mirrors
Before we knew what we looked like
Before we knew how we feel at all
A time before I knew how my body would work
Most months rusty water drains
A packet of small white circular tablets coated in sugar is responsible for my happiness
I imagine my ****** is the colour of a faded flannel cloth
Red used to be my favourite colour
On many occasions My body has felt like a new years resolution.

Your sweat reminded me of rainbows in petrol
It tasted like the sea.

Acceptance*
Accept all the things that come your way
Walk into each day with arms wide open ready for whatever may come

Accept the *good
and rejoice when you do
Accept all the love that gravitates towards you
and allow good feelings to flow through each vein in your body
and allow each nerve to be energized with this feeling
Go for that free hug on the street
Eat that molten chocolate lava cake you've been eyeing for weeks
Be good to yourself
Take a break from all your worries
And reflect this good into the world
Because the world is just a big mirror
Everything bouncing back to you

Accept the bad
because what is living without the challenge?
Accept your losses and come back stronger
Accept your bad feelings, for they make you human
Make mistakes and most importantly, learn from them
Accept that you can't be perfect, no matter how hard you try
Embrace that imperfection, you are beautiful
Accept every challenge, hardship and bump you encounter
Approach it with your heart as your armor, ready to conquer it
Accept the bad, and learn to use it in a good way

Accept everything
For they complete you
They make you you
They give you lessons you'll never learn in classrooms
They give you this new perspective on things that makes you understand everything just a tad bit better
And maybe by next year, I would've learned how to accept.

Find love
Learn to recognize it in the vast forms it may take
From a simple smile from a stranger
To meeting the one

Be ready to accept it with open arms,
As it may come unexpected
Receive love and most importantly
Learn to reciprocate it

When it does come,
Do not be selfish with it
Do not hide it or keep it to yourself
Plant the seed of love
So that you may produce more flowers, showing its beauty

When it wishes to leave,
It will hurt you
You will want to hold on to it
You will want to do everything humanly possible to make it stay
But it just won't
It can't
It wouldn't
It shouldn't**

Let love go
Release the selfish grips of your arms
That may have hurt you
And let someone else receive it
Let someone else experience
That magical feeling that love once gave you
And I promise,
Love will come back to you again someday
And hopefully by that time,
Love will be here to stay

Everyone is your friend unless proven otherwise

2. If he doesn’t answer, don’t keep sending texts. If he cared to talk to you, he would’ve responded.

3. Getting no message is also a message.

4. Don’t mistake knives with flowers when handed to you.

5. Sit on the floor of your shower until you can breathe again. Water will always love to love your skin.

6. Start writing with the intention of filling up one page. Write until your pen stops working and your hearts stops bleeding.

7. You are never anyone’s anything. You are not made to be owned.

8. Don’t make compromises you can’t live with. Compromise is a different version of what you want, not a whole other universe.

9. “No.” is a full sentence. Learn to use it.

10. Learn new vocabulary – because why the **** not? Write down your new words that you learn while reading, use them in conversations; expand your vocab, because when you are sitting there on the bus ride to real life, you’ll be glad you have.

11. Don’t expect people to walk through fire for you.

12. Don’t always be so **** prepared to walk through fire for others. Love doesn’t mean sacrifice. Love shouldn’t mean sacrifice.

13. Learn to let people pass through your life; like a summer breeze, not a storm that’s just been unleashed.

14. Sleeping is not possible when you’re angry or sad.

15. Love yourself the way you loved yourself at ten, before the world had a chance to fill your head with ugliness.

16. You don’t drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.

17. Plan things. Have something to look forward to.

18. Music isn’t about a social projection of your personality. Love what you love and don’t ever be sorry for it.

19. Forgive, but never forget.

20. Train your mind to see the good in everything.

21. Do not spend your life searching for a place to call home. Make the bones in your skeleton the only structure you need.

22. Patience is amazing. Waiting is hard, but worth it.

23. People will make time for you when they care about you. If they say they’re too busy or constantly if they constantly cancel their plans, they don’t care. People fight for you when they care.

24. Care. Not many people give a crap anymore.

25. Don’t try to be pretty. You were meant to burn down the earth and graffiti the sky. Don’t let anyone ever simplify you to just “pretty”.

26. Love burns out.

27. We are not responsible for what we have come to be, but if who you are doesn’t make you happy, then take a different path.

28. It’s nobody’s job to fix you. He just has to be there to hold you’re hand while you try to fix yourself.

29. If we could decide who we loved it would be a lot simpler, but much less magical.

30. Do not set yourself on fire to keep others warm.

31. Find your people. I don’t mean someone who also likes the same tv shows as your or someone who shares your love for cereal. Your people will bring out the best in you. Your people that you can talk to until 3 in the morning and feel like your heart has grown.

32. Take a bath. Sleep in. Eat fruits and vegetables. Drink lots of water. Go for long walks. Treat yourself. Love your body. Exhale.

33. Create a plan that will be enjoyable for exercise and just do it. –no ******* around this year.

34. Take the bricks they used to throw at you and build a ******* castle.

35. Always bring a sweater. Even if you think it won’t be cold.

36. Pay attention to what people say when they’re angry. When you make up and they tell you they didn’t mean any of it, know that they did. Also know that they wish they didn’t. But they did.

37. You’re not over it if it still makes you angry.

38. Read more. Read classics, read newspapers, read magazines, read fictional books, read joke books,
read poems. Just read.

39. Do not let what he wants eclipse what you need.

40. Bleed for better reasons this year.

I have cried over less, and I've cried over better
And I've spent periods of time within panic attacks
In the middle of the class when I can't count the facts
And over high numbers, my cheeks have been wetter.

I have cried over less, and for no reason at all
And I've spent so much time loathing me more and more
Late at night when it's all been for naught, I was sure
And over lesser failures, I would weep; I would bawl

I have cried over less, so it's safe to assume
That I've done what I wished and at least seem to think
That for once, it's not worth the time it takes to sink
Into my shallow depression and once more be exhumed.

I have cried over less, and I'm glad of the fact
That I see black from white and grey inbetween
And I'm smart, even now, and more than I seem
And my new year's resolution seems safely intact.

I don't make resolutions
But this year could be different
I think it's time
For a little change of my own
No more waiting
No more letting others
Fight for me
I'm standing tall
As tall as I can be
I'm giving up the fight
Of caring for others
Who don't care for me
I'm going to be
The person i always knew I could be
But was too afraid to let show
This year I've decided
To be a new me

I have been counting every firsts

Here is another first
This one is special
Your first. My first with you.

The last year was my best
I was blessed with you
I thank God
Here is another new one awaiting discovery
A memorable one it will be

My resolution...
To keep loving you
Forever...

The concept of time is weird. One minute you're fifteen and you think you know what the world is all about, but it turns out you don't. The next minute you're nineteen and trying to figure out what the hell to do with your life and how to do this "adult" thing.

Song: This Charming Man by The Smiths

Resolutions are empty words without action being taken.
And only time can reveal if I remain true to my chosen path for 2015.
My granddaughter just turned sixteen on December 31st.
I cannot even remember what resolutions I made each year.
I want there to be a difference this year.
My chosen word, my resolution is ACTION.

Goodbye year of the Horse.
Hello year of the sheep.