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I thought you were an ally,
but walls divide, and I

don’t see a way around
this tonight.

You can’t avoid the fallout,
because being dead inside

isn’t a good reason
to sidestep

when you told
all those lies.

Just look me
in the eyes,

tell me it was worth
bleeding what was left of me

one last time.

I know there’s
the devil in the details,
but as far as I can tell,

I’m over it, and
I’m done seeing red.

Live your own
life in sin,

because I won’t live
my life with your regrets.
sw333ta Dec 2024
i hope you come to none
it’s done
i’m done it’s done
well done
well gone
well played well stayed
i cant wait
for what’s next
to an end
i just can put the done in its one
over due what can you loose?
just like a drug
i give you a shove
to what is none of done
and what can’t wait can’t say
and what i say is great
to what i’ve Lund
to what is done
Lund to a crud
i give you a shove
but more harder bigger worser
i heard ya but i don’t know ya
i don’t wanna get a good
if i could i would
but i should
and i would
but i could
and i did hope.
i wrote this in 2022 ;)
sw333ta Dec 2024
picking flowers off your nonchalance
i can't stand it
i can't stand here
it's very clear
that you don't want me here
but what it does
its like giving you a shove
stop comparing
stop caring
like a drug
it makes you almost like a rug
except i'm dragging you out of the ruck
into the trash
out in a bag
but what else could you have done?
i don't know
Joshua Phelps Dec 2024
Step one,
Get in their
Head,

Make them
Believe love
Is real

Before you
Leave them
For dead.

Step two,

Love isn't
What you
Need.

So you cast
Them aside,

Only looking
Out for yourself
And failing to see:

Nothing's
Permanent.

Toss and turn,
Watch it burn

Because
Coffins aren't
Just for the dead

Lay them down,
Lock them in,

Because
Broken hearts

Never win.
I'll never believe in love again after this.
dead poet Dec 2024
ready or not,
here i come.
count your blessings,
find the sum -
of all the tears
that’re due to flow
from a corner of your heart
you didn’t even know
existed before;
now open the door;
embrace your mortality -
let it purge your core
of all the notions
that vexed your spirit, and,
twisted your mind, well -
not anymore.

i’ve come to show you
the only way out;  
‘take it or leave it’ -
i’m leaving with you,
or without.
have you no clue  
how profound the disease is? -
it’ll take a while
to pick up the broken pieces.

sleep shall be but a
fleeting dream.
oh yes,
it’s a wicked scheme.
i’ve come to search your soul
like a sleuth;  

i’m your fateful reckoning -
your ******* moment of truth.
Joshua Phelps Dec 2024
Storm clouds raging
in my head
for days on end

Feeling temporary,
heartbroken,
stuck within.

Lightning strikes,
thunder echoes,

each boom feeling like

a shock to the heart,

and I'm trying
my best
to not
fall apart.

I try to find
that spark inside,

and I know the light
hasn't faded

because I know
I may be numb, but
I'm not dead inside.

Riding the storm,
it's hard to hold on

when I don't know
what the future holds.

But I know
to get past
it all,

I've got to
press forward,
process,

and move on.
Joshua Phelps Nov 2024
if love is the
last thing
on your mind

then why do I
have to suffer
time and time

again?

I thought I
made the right
choices

but mistakes
were made and
I've fallen

in a pit
of despair.

self-pity,
and feeling
so worthless

that nothing
can ever
compare.

I thought this
would be the last
time

my heart
would be broken,

but it feels
like you
don't even care,

I'm forever
stuck in disrepair.
Joshua Phelps Nov 2024
compromise,
separate

take the time
to realize

there's a point
of no return.

there's no reason to

drag this out
and dig yourself
a deeper hole

compromise,
separate

rationalize
and grow.

there's no sense
of urgency

but you need
to know

broken pieces
always shine,

you're not alone
in this anymore.
dead poet Nov 2024
बड़े होते बस यही सुना था,
‘कुछ सोच बड़ा, कुछ कर बड़ा।’
काँटों भरी इस राह पर मैं नंगे पाँव ही निकल पड़ा।
बहुत निचोड़ा इन भावों को मैंने,
इस खोज में मैंने बहुत सहा।
पर जो दिल से चाहिए, साला आखिर वो मिलता कहाँ!

एक शैतान है मुझमें, जो रोज़ कहता है,
‘छोड़ दे पैशन, कमा ले पैसे।’
‘कला के इस महासागर में डूब मरे हैं तेरे जैसे।’
मानता कहाँ दिल फिर भी मेरा?
ये तो है उसके लिए साँस की तरह!
अब चाहे डूब कर मरे या हो जाए जल कर राख,
इससे दुनिया का क्या लेना-देना?
अपनी लड़ाई भी तो यारो, आखिर खुद से ही थी ना?

कलम की नोक पर ज़िंदगी का भार
उठाते कलाईयाँ रगड़ गईं।
ग़रीबी में आटा गीला था,
आँसुओं से बात और बिगड़ ही गई।
चलो कोई नहीं, मैं भी मान गया!
गिले-शिकवों को पेपरवेट के नीचे दबा गया।
स्याही की कड़वी स्वाद को होठों से लगा गया।
मूंगफली पड़ी थी, उसे रोटी के बीच डाल कर चबा गया।

खोज रहा हूँ आज भी मैं विचारों की वो वर्णमाला,
सहारे जिसके कह सकूँ जो इतने दिन मैंने टाला।

तितर-बितर करते, इधर-उधर भागते,
थोड़ा भटक सा गया हूँ…
बंद घड़ी की सुई की तरह मानो जैसे अटक सा गया हूँ।
वक्त के आगे अपनी क़िस्मत लिखने को जूझ रहा हूँ।
अल्फ़ाज़ों से सजे इस दर्पण को
मैं आपकी ओर रख कर पूछ रहा हूँ…

‘क्या आपको पता है गौरव का फूल किस चोटी पर खिलता है?’
‘ज़िंदगी में जो चाहिए, साला आखिर वो कहाँ मिलता है?’
dead poet Nov 2024
he lost his way, he knows not when.
chasing false idols he mistook for men.
he'd lose the child, if he only knew then -
he'd find a way to be a man again.
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