Anxiously and angrily awaiting any angels acceptance
An abating agrivated apparition appears
assuming an assailants attempt
attacking at any angle
attaching and amputating
all anatomy
Animals avoid
An archeologist annoyed
All apparitions alack
Just a man with manic depression
Trying to get his brain back

Dealing with depression feels like a demon destroying you from the inside out this is a product from a depression episode.

When you look into your mothers eyes
    There's a feeling you hold sacred
    When i do there's a lightning bolt of hatred
  Why doesn't she love me?
What did i do wrong
A feeling my brother sister and i will remember for the rest of our lives
For long i long for my demise
fix the root of the issue
but I'm only six and in need of a tissue
I wake up for school feeling fear
It's an energy that's tangible
She woke up late it's our fault
We're used to it It's manageable
Home from school
She misplaced her keys
can't find them
Our fault it's understandable
The scent of pretzels and beer
fill the living room
It's Tuesday so it's practical
My sister dropped a box of crayons
She deserved it It's graspable
Looking back at it now It's laughable
Not because it's funny but because
to our souls nothing is insurmountable

eric calabrese Dec 2016

just give
me 10 minutes
atleast a second to explain
The currents currently shifting and drifting us away
The ocean's floors
dance causing a disarray
Or am i just an overthinker that's always
thinking He's
a thought away
Ironic cause i thoroughly thought through a way
To put my
pride aside try to beg you to stay

A lucrative love
i long but not lust
The lesions don't lessen
after the departure of trust
Clock is ticking
an explanation I've yet to explain
5 more minutes
I'll convincingly create a love
That will substain

What Do I Know?

That your dimple is upper cheek level
& you tilt to the right often,
especially when grinning.

You don't know how to react to compliments,
which I love,
because your reaction is so sincere.

You grin reluctantly
& prepare a steady response,
but happiness takes over...
and you allow.
Its often a battle of quick wit
& just taking it with you.

All so cute.

Oh,
& you are sensitive about your shit,
just shade it well.
But all those traits
leave me so enamoured...
...that and beyond!

so long as every breath I take is for us,
I'm most delighted ❤
my delight is borne off yours.

I can't wait to see what would become of a miniature you,
or rather,
parts of our being infused into one

they'd be glorious.
bestowed in all your beat bits
& attributes.
they'd be fortunate

oh dear Lord,
such a gracious blessing

you are everything being,
absolutely everything.
a subtle thought just about gets me aroused.
your grins complete me.
your stare nourishes me.
being around you,
chatting to you,
fulfills me.

I love you,
too soon?

but I love you.
have loved you
&
will love you
so long as air
circulates my lungs,
I love you!

I miss those fidgety hands,
they do some justice to my giddy feelings.
the cartwheels my heart is doing,
reflect through my smile.
my face is even all lit up.

I can't help but look at you whenever you talk,
amidst temptations of shutting you up with a kiss,
listening to the sound of your voice is so soothing.

it's the joy that only you are eternally deserving of,
I've long since fallen,
given the poetry of your nature...
...how could I not?!

I wouldn't choose to be experiencing what I am
with anyone either than yourself...
you ease every inch of my being
with a mere glimpse of your sight.

I was smiling alone when I sighted you at Parkie,
my heart raced peacefully to draw itself closer to yours
a remarkable feeling,
I must say.

I just am so happy.
so glad.
this journey?
I wouldn't take anybody else

...That left me feeling all giddy,
From the uncertainty of whether this was a dream I was living in reality,
Or whether this is the deceit of reality being shaded as a dream.

"Soothing the inner workings of one's tenderest of bits,
Marked like a scar well earned in a battle for versions of your sincerest.
For it is within that very form,
That every aching moment of crisp joy you stand accused of,
Makes the mind's prosecution worthwhile.
The mind is a tool that a poet uses,
But his words remain the consequence of an aroused heart.
The heart which is the very being of what renders a poet a poet.
It left you flirting with a poet's heart..."

I love how you can put my feelings into words,
As if they were yours to bear...
I love how you put my heart at ease,
The moment a smile forms itself on my lips.
I love how you remind me how I always embrace who I am,
As much as those who embrace me do as well.

I love that,
And so much more...
But you know what I love the most?

I love how I love you so much.

I always wanted to fall in love with a poet...

It made sense because...
I love the strung syllables,
Between sheets of metaphors,
That make my mind curl up,
As if it were being massaged by the touch of words.

Instead I fell in love with a writer...

Who wove my life into a ball of constant curiosity,
Making it almost impossible not to...
Fumble over words to utter,
Or have me glowing at the sight of a notification with his name coupling it...

I fell in love with the gentle caress of his words,
As each one slowly brought sense to a beautifully pieced sentence,
That left me...

[...to be continued]**

eric calabrese Oct 2016

Funny, love is felt when one must leave
leaves change colors to match those deceived
It all starts when
Your heart has yet to come into leaf
It slowly warms
forgetting one's grief
At first feelings bud
but you keep them brief
Temperatures heat up
Love begins to seep
branches open wide
Your roots dig deep
Thing's get chilly
Your bark doesn't render a peep
Lack of sound forces a change
I'm talking things you shouldn't be able to reap
Yet everything crashes before winter creeps
Cold wind smashes
You can feel your structure creek
Ironic the creek also froze over matching
Your defeat
I'm telling you if love you wish to seak
Beware of the seasons for they change
Sometimes before they peak

eric calabrese Oct 2016

A sorry suicidal song i sing
To a group of people who
Can't understand a thing
A drowning downpour
I divulge diligently
Searching for a person
To run their fingers through my soul
Gently and ever so effortlessly..

A sad story of a stone that once shined
The reflection like the sun touching the sea
Wish i could rewind
Getting ready to end my life
I could care less if that last line rhymed
Maybe a bullet to my brain could help my mind
Escape my head
That's the real definition of blowing ones mind

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