Each lives inside everyone;

We have little versions of others  pumping hearts
Sharing words with us;
An image, well more than that,
                           It's as if each one
                           Was a poem, a half-living poetry in motion
                           And it's good to talk with those.

Yet sometimes I have to put them all out to sleep,
Sometimes I need a moment with the dark.

I don't write as much as i used to
Truth is
it's some shit i just got used to
Truth is
it's not something i choose to
Sometimes my mind is a mine of gold
Other times
it's a murder case gone cold
Maybe i should give this up
Bottle it in even when i feel like It's about to erupt
Let the dynamite in the cave self destruct

Anxiously and angrily awaiting any angels acceptance
An abating agrivated apparition appears
assuming an assailants attempt
attacking at any angle
attaching and amputating
all anatomy
Animals avoid
An archeologist annoyed
All apparitions alack
Just a man with manic depression
Trying to get his brain back

Dealing with depression feels like a demon destroying you from the inside out this is a product from a depression episode.

When you look into your mothers eyes
    There's a feeling you hold sacred
    When i do there's a lightning bolt of hatred
  Why doesn't she love me?
What did i do wrong
A feeling my brother sister and i will remember for the rest of our lives
For long i long for my demise
fix the root of the issue
but I'm only six and in need of a tissue
I wake up for school feeling fear
It's an energy that's tangible
She woke up late it's our fault
We're used to it It's manageable
Home from school
She misplaced her keys
can't find them
Our fault it's understandable
The scent of pretzels and beer
fill the living room
It's Tuesday so it's practical
My sister dropped a box of crayons
She deserved it It's graspable
Looking back at it now It's laughable
Not because it's funny but because
to our souls nothing is insurmountable

eric calabrese Dec 2016

just give
me 10 minutes
atleast a second to explain
The currents currently shifting and drifting us away
The ocean's floors
dance causing a disarray
Or am i just an overthinker that's always
thinking He's
a thought away
Ironic cause i thoroughly thought through a way
To put my
pride aside try to beg you to stay

A lucrative love
i long but not lust
The lesions don't lessen
after the departure of trust
Clock is ticking
an explanation I've yet to explain
5 more minutes
I'll convincingly create a love
That will substain

eric calabrese Oct 2016

Funny, love is felt when one must leave
leaves change colors to match those deceived
It all starts when
Your heart has yet to come into leaf
It slowly warms
forgetting one's grief
At first feelings bud
but you keep them brief
Temperatures heat up
Love begins to seep
branches open wide
Your roots dig deep
Thing's get chilly
Your bark doesn't render a peep
Lack of sound forces a change
I'm talking things you shouldn't be able to reap
Yet everything crashes before winter creeps
Cold wind smashes
You can feel your structure creek
Ironic the creek also froze over matching
Your defeat
I'm telling you if love you wish to seak
Beware of the seasons for they change
Sometimes before they peak

eric calabrese Oct 2016

A sorry suicidal song i sing
To a group of people who
Can't understand a thing
A drowning downpour
I divulge diligently
Searching for a person
To run their fingers through my soul
Gently and ever so effortlessly..

A sad story of a stone that once shined
The reflection like the sun touching the sea
Wish i could rewind
Getting ready to end my life
I could care less if that last line rhymed
Maybe a bullet to my brain could help my mind
Escape my head
That's the real definition of blowing ones mind

eric calabrese Sep 2016

Mental stimulation
caught up in the moment
All this time i kept a hold of my emotions
as they lie dormant

The radiance she emits
transcends that of the sun
More like a super nova exploding
sending my heart on the run

Her smile is elegance at it's finest
It professes her confidence
Yet compliments her shyness

Lips soft to the touch,
refreshing like the rain
One tap mesmerizes me driving me insane

Mental stimulation
Caught up in the moment
Who would of knew
You'd become my main component

eric calabrese Sep 2016

She has trust in her eye's
They mesmerize me every time...
Perfection on her lips
The slightest taste should be a crime...

Pain smeared over her smile
The slightest glance i get lost for a while...

Love wrapped around her brain
Mental stimulation that drives me insane...
A boyfriend in her heart that doesn't view her the same..
It's almost as if cruel cupid
Enjoys my pain...

eric calabrese Sep 2016

severity too severe
daringly dealing with duality
The monster in my head contrast the angel of my personality
perpetually perfecting my perspective of  insanity can it be?
He tells me he sees me swinging on a tree by the sea
Imagine the obscene scene one had seen
In desperation i declare a declaration not to decline in an acid solution
He salutes my solution but swears my life
Equals pollution, garbage
I think i need a mental institution
I love life and the growing intrusion
Of problems
The birds bees and trees fill the void with joy in volume
My problem is i need problems
But before i can solve em he
Respectfully recites the devils coordinates
He was equipt with a life ordinance
I no longer face being in love with vanity
This is just part two of my growing
Indecisive insanity

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