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Meg B Apr 2015
My raybans still covered
my swollen  eyes as I stepped
inside the Rite Aid,
in my pathetic attempt to
hide from the neighborhood how much
I had been crying.
Tears of anger and
some of despair and
others of sheer exhaustion
had coated my cheeks
and worn the edges of my eyelids
raw and reddened my
corneas.
I had stumbled out of my apartment
in an effort to rid my body of
feelings, assuming the brisk spring breeze
could somehow sweep up everything
I felt and whisk it away as
quick as it had come.
I squeaked past a couple
******* clad women with
sunken eyes that bore holes
into the glass of the cooler
as they stared longingly at the
rather large variety of
malt liquors, the selection of soft drinks
lesser than the collection of
40s I passed on my way to the
back of the store.
I distracted myself imagining
the taste of the various soda pops,
a wild cherry Pepsi dissolving into my
daydream tongue right before it
turned to Big Red Cream Soda.
Diet Sunkist in hand,
I stared at the ingredients on the orange soda bottle and reread the same words
over and over as he interjected himself again and again.
I made my way to the counter,
feeling ever grateful for my sunglasses
as more tears welled,
and I cleared my throat before mumbling a way-too-weak-for-an-outgoing-girl hello.
Before I knew it my distraction faded
from view, and I turned left down Oak
as his face peeked out in my
rear view mirror in the majesty of
the sunset.
I shook off a feeling of admiration and
reminded myself that even after all this time
he still manages to disappoint me as
he always has.
I murmured something about how,
"He ain't ****" like I'm some bad
***** that doesn't give a **** about a dude.
But then I remembered how deeply I had loved
a man who never loved me back and
never failed to prove it.
My stomach began to drop,
leaving me feeling as empty as the
messages he had sent me in his pathetic
attempts to convince me of ******* masked as
the rhetoric he knew I wanted to hear,
just enough to keep me around for his
(admittedly) selfish reasons.
I loved him and hated him all at once
as I realized 4 months ago when
I told myself (and him) that I was moving on,
it was only my head that had,
my heart still staggering, like a
drunk stumbling off a belly full
of cheap whiskey,
And as I later drowned my sorrows in
TV dramas and artificial sweeteners,
I vowed to get that last piece back and really let go...
I'll start tomorrow
when I sober up.
Porcelainwings Nov 2014
She
When he holds me,
I feel secure
A constant in this everchanging world
That allows me to exist –
But when she holds me,
My spirit flies high,
And she gives me all the inspiration
I need to be –

And when he kisses me,
I feel  unity and tender love,
But when she kisses me,
The caterpillars in my body
Break free and form something beautiful,
something new.

And when he’s gone,
I miss the constancy of being loved
Rather than I miss him,
But when she’s gone
I miss all the overwhelming feelings we shared
More than I miss her.

And when we make love,
He makes me experience
A great lust with a great desire
But when she makes love to me-
My imagination is running wild
An exciting fantasy
And  everything in this world
Seems to be designed only for us.

*I’m drunk on her while he tries to cure me
Ethan Titus Oct 2014
What is it like to have confidence beyond your gaze?
What is it like to have unwavering courage, even on your worst days?
I wish upon a star that I knew
I wish upon a star that it would spring out of the blue
Lowering my head to the ground and raising my hands to God
Does the world really find this trend so odd?
I guess most are just obsessed with the human '***'
I'll submit myself to the will of the Lord
If only we were connected by an ethernet cord
I run about wishing I knew what He wanted me to do
My ears feel deaf, I'm focused on you
I try to change my focus
My brain wonders, what about 'us'?
Is there a potential future?
When is it that I will truly feel mature?
Why must I fear all that I think to do?
Why must my heart and brain revolve around you?
Emily Grace Sep 2014
I smile at people for no reason.
Just simply trying to be nice.
I've done it a million times.
But when i first saw you, my heart smiled for me.
With love there is a price to pay
and for you i'm willing to go into debt.
I've searched everywhere for the definition of perfection.
I believe i found it in your eyes.
I've never seen something so beautiful.
It's not my fault i love you, it's yours.
Revenant Feb 2014
Your breath burnt like a white hot jealous lover's rage against my very core as you peppered love-drunk kisses down my neck.
What lust we found tucked away in the secret, undiscovered places of our hearts where lover nor stranger had dared trod.
You silenced my thoughts and electrified my mind with things no one could ever comprehend.
You sent raging shocks through my spine, and made shudders and sighs erupt from my mouth like none other.
What a pitiful thing it was for you to let me slip away.
Rather, what a disgrace it was for you to trade me for poison.

Selfish.

— The End —