I hear the sin of my past clawing at my heart.
Every day that passes it inches closer and closer to its sustenance.
It whispers its malice while I cower in fear.
The days grow longer. The night's grow strong and I grow weaker.

I lay down yet again with another battle won.
My wounds are deep and reach far beneath the tissue others see.
The battles I've won are not an accomplishment.
The battles I've won are delaying my inevitable descent.

The final night is here and I feel our breathes are one and the same.
We do not battle it out as fabled in fiction.
The clawing has stopped and the sustenance run dry.
We are one and the same both monster and man.

We feel the light pierce our skin as an outstretched arm reaches to us.
The fear remains as we cower from its radiance.
The arm stretches out and calls our name.
No. The arm stretches out and calls my name.

We are... No I am... Or we...?
It calls for me not us yet still we... No I remain.
He grabs our hand and pulls me out.
Lips locked and all is forgetten as he whispers to me I love you...

I not we now know I am forever free

It's been a few months since i posted

Here again, still at the edge,
Seeking for help. No one will notice,
Before this you're the only one who will notice me but never again.

I miss those days, if everything was still the same right now, now i would be lying down on your shoulder
Replaying my favorite song
Helping you to light up ur cigarettes.

Too bad it's all gone,
My efforts wasn't enough when i thought i've already tried my best but
maybe to you those small efforts its nothing at all.

Really thankful for everything you did for me
Even the smallest thing
Risking ur freedom for me
Or even ur happiness.

You seems to be happier,
happier than before
hope she's treating you better than me
hope that she can do those small little thing for you that i didn't manage to do
hope that she comfort you the way you wanted when you're down.

Everyday it gets darker and darker for me.

My loss, never yours.