In the sea of black
Amongst the wash of tears and the hands held tightly
The memories
Shared by a stranger in a pulpit
Prayers joined in for the occasion
A curious celebration of life
Your best bits
Like Match of the Day highlights.
Evading the times you cried
The times you didn't want anyone around.
Yet here they are - how would you feel?

Outside, the awkward embraces
Of long lost acquaintances
Awkwardly reacquainting
Amongst the tombstones, cursed forever to
Hear the condolences
See the sorrow of strangers
Feel the emptiness.

The hit of grief on the journey home.
Hot tears coursing their path onto the steering wheel.
The relentless regret
Of unspoken truths, lies, compliments and apologies.
But the unfailing, niggling persistence rather to have loved and lost.
And been a few crossed off calendar days.
A passing thought when hearing a song.
A flickering vision through whiskey-blurred eyes.
A small piece of the jigsaw.

Carry the torch high
Even in the darkest night
Let your flame burn bright.
 
Have courage in your heart
Step out from the shade
Be bold and unafraid.

Rise to the challenge
Climb the mountain run the race
Do it at your own pace.

Cheer loudly from the sidelines
Help others out
With an encouraging shout.

Don't fight your own fate
Accept how things are
And you'll always go far.

Follow your dreams
Make it happen, reach your goal
Find peace in your soul.

Live life to the full
Be happy, be kind
And your star will always shine.

I am going to a party
But for what I do not know
Perhaps a friend is getting older
Or feels it's time to go
But I am going to a party
Nonetheless
And I hope that i will find
Good friends, good talk, good wine, and good thoughts

I now approach the door
With a gift box in my hand
And I begin to realize
Exactly where I am
Marble floors are painted
With dew drop pews, blacks, and navy blues
The preacher barks the same old tune
of "Dust to Dust"
"He's gone too soon"

So naturally, with me being me,
In my green button down
And carpenter's jeans
I spin to leave, but let out a squeak

Everybody turns to see
The fool with the present
Who seems to have passed
Right by without knowing
What he walked into would be

What would you do?
Because my reaction can't be beat
I quite simply dropped the box
And ran down the street

This is it.
It has come to an end.
It has been a long journey together.
But we got to this point at last.

My eyes,
far to tired for any more tears.
My ears,
not willing to listen to any more condolences.
My voice,
cracks while trying to get any words out.

And my heart,
cannot break any further.
As I look down to the coffin.
A coffin filled with all that reminds me of you.
Be it the teddy bears from valentines day to the songs you dedicated to me.
Be it all the beautiful memories to the darkest moments we shared.

Its time to bury it all.
5... No, 6 feet under ground.
The last goodbye.
Because today is the funeral.
The funeral of my feelings for you.

molten i woke
to your understated
outro song
crowded at the corpse door
with the curtains drawn
and only briefly wishing
phantom pain
on endless vigils
for a swollen soul

sealed the crypt
your moonlit recital ceased
to no applause

Bury me head first
So everyone will have to stand on my ***

A quarter-life is twenty years,
Forty marks a half,
In forty years you’ll be a stone,
With a stick-on epitaph.

“She was a force of nature,
Brave and bold and bright!”
They’ll say - who never knew you -
As you’re borne into the night.
When really you were old and tired,
And didn’t care to fight.