I finally know who I am,
And what it feels like
To be with the person
You want to spend your life with.
You made me realise
That no mattter what everyone says,
The best gift to give someone
Is letting them be themselves
Without a spot of judgment.

You used to go by another name
AMELIA
Now you're somebody new, and your name is
NIKOLAI

When i was with you
My heart was at W.   A.    R.  
Questions and screams and bloodshed
Now you have my friend
I just hope you treat him right
You made out with him in the park
But did you really feel?
He doesnt deserve
To feel what i felt
When you had my heartstrings in your hands

Who left you
so broken that your
eyes now cut deeper than
the sharpest knife?
We are left with such hatred
weighed upon our hearts
and all we can do
is laugh.

I am once again
torn between forgiving them
and forgetting them

6:29 PM
7/11/20

today at lunch
I saw lilly -
like the flower but
with another l,
a fake -
your girlfriend
(soon to be ex
but you don't know that yet)
she actually smiled at me -
i think she was surprised
i hope so -
in response
my ****** muscles
contorted into a
smile(?) more false
than i ever believed i was
capable of producing.
it wasn't really a smile
it was
******* For Ripping Her Away From Me
it was
I Would Like To Punch You But Self Control
maybe (fingers crossed)
it scared her.

And in a few years when I see you I'll smile,
For I'll remember
Who I was with you

You'll be with a different man,
Brown hair and big hands
But your eyes will be the same shade of blue