A constant battle for power and pride
The shots are fired
The words desired
And the death toll is my love for you

Everything we once had
Has fallen victim to our hatred
my heart beats with hope
As yours sinks with drought


why  must it be like this?
A war between us?
we are blood
***** by the word family

There are some things that time cannot forget,
Nor Life’s long course erase, but still remain
Without a doubt.  We have no choice, and yet
We fain would lose remembrance of the pain

And sorrow that accompany that thought.
I once rejoiced in knowledge and the fact
That better memory could not be bought,
But now I mourn it, for I cannot act

Upon the feelings I have known so long.
Yet I cannot forget what I still feel,
Nor even come to think that it is wrong.
The ache remains—my heart will never heal.

If only mind could come to realize
What heart knows: unreturned love never dies.

It took him years to stop loving her,
For the impression of her eyes to fade.
There'd be dreams and nightmares,
He'd see her around town.
He could never really move on from her perfume, the colour of her eyes in the morning, sunlight bouncing off her figure;
The way her nose crinkled as she laughed.

when i held my father’s hand
during evening prayer
i realized that it shakes
because of his addiction
he needs another cigarette
then i realize that my hand shakes too
because i need a cigarette as well
and the reason
i hate him so much
probably lies on the fact
that we’re basically
the same monster

you,
unlike mom,
were always calm
and collected.
but you were so
oblivious,
you had no idea what she did
to me,
that monster you loved so much
was so unfair to me,
but you were too clueless to notice.
i can not blame you, dad,
she always put that mask around
you, so you couldn't figure it out,
even if you wanted to.

i cried for a month straight
when you passed away,
and mom was so calm
about it, i don't think
she ever loved you.

but i still love you, dad,
i love you in ways she never could,
i still love you, even though
your feet no longer walk
on this earth.

*and i am sorry, that i turned into
her,
so, so sorry,
i never wanted to
disappoint you,

I miss the way
You said my name
I miss they way
You'd comfort me

I miss the way
You'd brush my hair
I miss the way
You'd protect me

I miss the way
You used to be
I miss having
My Father

If words could talk, they would say that my heart
has surpassed an eclipse
I was obscured by my own insecurity and
inability to function without you, so much so
that I thought
maybe if you left I would break in two
and again into four
until the pieces of me became as extinct as
the beating hearts of the dead
my undulating and infinite obligation to have to love you
is in fact not an obligation at all,
it is a desire
and an inclination for your paternal approval
your sturdy as rock disposition
is the foundation that keeps me tall at 5ft2
I love you papa and perhaps before
you never knew
just how much you mean to me
but now you know there is nothing stronger
than my fierce ability to protect you
as you have protected me

every day of my life