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 Dec 2015 nothing's Amiss
Sombro
I sought out
A girl whom I could envy
I sought in
A feeling I could control.

Laughing meltwater laughter
Skimming stones with skipping feet
All together
As if nothing were the same as others.

I sought out
A bond forged in experience
I brought in a little less control
I found myself drawn

To just one more hug.

Don't let's go, don't let's be
It's not as simple
As love and hate
For I was not free

I hold your hand and
Feel the shackles
I stroke your hair and
Feel the web.
Sticky.

I look at my feet
As I trot beside you and
I'm led by sticks and carrots
By my endless want for something
You'll have to go away to give me.
A poem for someone, that much is understood.
 Dec 2015 nothing's Amiss
Aeerdna
12:02  in the night
and I miss the other 12:02-s
with you and Dylan’s blues
and no words sometimes
just with the drinks in which we were drowning, but we wouldn't let
each other die.

12:02 in the night
and I am trying to hold your voice somewhere
in the corner of my mind,
but it fades away with every second.
I'm trying to remember the way your left eye would smile
everytime after I’d kiss it,
the way you used to write my body down on random pieces of paper,
the nights in the bars,
the smoke of cigars,
the tissues on which we would write our love,
the morning coffee,
your body next to mine,
your dreams, my tears, your trains,
the station where I've waited for you
so many times,
the way your fingers would touch my skin,
the words,
the flowers,
your shirt covering my body in the morning,
your heart,
that night at the beach,
or the sunrises.
I'm trying to remember
the “you and I”,
the we

I'm trying to remember when did we give up
saving each other
from drowning to death.
I woke up with gloomy dreams,
A pretty face I remember,
She had the vive of a queen,
While I was the slave of cold December.

Dream again, I ask my heart and mind,
Fading images meant this story's end,
So my eyes wore a sailor's dress,
Searching for a lost pile of sand.

The minutes of that dream shaped my hours dull,
With no awe in this life , I waited for her call,
I became what they call incorrigible,
As this desert heart now needed a last rainfall,

I never asked for her lover's heart,
Just to watch her skip my heartbeat,
Nor craved for those moonlight lips,
As I spend a lifetime watching our eyes meet.

The dream may never come,
Her sunset eyes may never rise,
For the sake of my capacious heart, I still close my eyes,
To live a thousand deaths to once see her blue sunset eyes.
What strange memory serves this fate?
Why the silly sheep has lost its way?
In subterranean dungeon lies the secret,
Guarded by the wicked wolf, they say.
The Oracle of the high priest,
Along the testaments of old gods,
Has told the tale of an Apocalypse,
A due judgement against our odds.

The sulfurous land has grew a thorn,
Right in the sane hearts of men,
Like a wildfire in a scorched summer,
The lost sheep led to the lion's den.
Through these seasonal dark days,
The pristine shots of old Bourbon and the sour taste of a lemon squeeze,
Over the pages of a forgotten book,
Were now the ghost under cease.

For this old eyes has seen the waves,
That broke us down like a beach tree,
With nature bells once we played,
Now they became our arch enemy.
Through civilizations we pursued,
Shallow contemporaries and history,
We forged nuclear swords on wooden fields,
And reap the fruits of downhill misery.

We treasured the featherbrained ways to progress,
And recklessly stroke the beam of balance,
For we waged the song of disasters,
To now sing in this sulfurous silence.
As the blue water has turned to air,
The green leaves dyed themselves brown under drought,
The soil poisoned by the radioactive breeze,
And to our miseries, we all laughed, we all laughed.

So won't we plunder the right actions,
Course the way to a changing surface,
The secret of everlasting existence,
Lies in the red flames of the old furnace.

The sheep was rescued by mere chances,
For the lion was not yet born,
For this looming night is still to come,
As the world hangs on that silly thorn.
I have been programmed
Been tighten with the wires
Cant move and think beyond the limit
I am smiling as no sadness got place

I work, care and love
Dont have choice beside that
I make myself happy
Dont know how to express hurt

Can you please make me feel
That I can cry& share my problems
Can you give me time to feel the love
Want to do the thing you are doing for long

And poor me , he switched me off
Reprogrammed me
And make me robot again
:(  :(
There's a hole in my pocket
And the memory of who I wanted to be fell through and into the cracks in-between the floorboards
I can't seem to retrieve the concept of who I once was,

It's getting colder outside, and my brick walls have been crumbling as of late
And the inside of this house isn't exactly beautifully picturesque

The soul I've stolen for show and tell isn't my own and he's much nicer
than the thief underneath

So please, do me a favor,

And leave
 Nov 2015 nothing's Amiss
Sombro
Does she still remember
How a coy smile I summoned
Felt on her lips
When I slipped
From the doorway?

Does she still remember
My stinking shirt and red face
While we sat together and
Drank a cooling coffee, which
She needed more than me?

Does she still remember
Brushing past, like bluebirds could dream of,
Making the peace sign as
A plea to her mind and
A recognition of me?

Does she know,
I was scared, and
A little unworthy
To feel all I had thought ready;
All made perfect for me?

Will she take the offer,
Barely written by my lips, and
Come here one day
To remind herself and me
Of what never happened...

And still might?
A girl I met
 Nov 2015 nothing's Amiss
Kat
Life has a funny way of working out
For example, I once won $100 on a scratch ticket and in the exact same hour a rock hit my windshield
It cost me $100 to replace it
When I met him
The universe was aligned
The stars hung themselves in constellations only we could see
We spoke a language all our own
And the razor blades that consistently sliced through my sanity became dull
Flowers grew from the cracks in my sidewalk
His voice was a song that I always wanted to listen to
With him by my side the world was a place that I was no longer afraid of
But life has a funny way of working itself out
Fear was like the Berlin Wall
Built overnight
Separating our hearts from ever beating together ever again
And I miss him
I miss him so much that I joined tinder
I miss him so much that I deleted tinder
I miss him so much that my recent ****** partners miss him
I miss him so much
that I'll look at pictures of deceased family members just to try and miss something that's actually gone
I miss him so much that I hide in the back corners of coffee shops and libraries just to be as invisible as he makes me feel
I miss him so much that I prayed to God to let me have him back
But even God was too busy to answer the phone
I wish I was a number on the clock so he would always have time for me
I wish I was a chapter in his text books so he would always have to study me
I wish I was the nicotine in his cigarettes so I could live in his resin lungs
But life has a funny way of working itself out
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