Words float in lost eyes,
broken veins are calling me.

We wake up and plan
to smile at strangers,
and hold the door open,
and say no to anger.

But then there's traffic,
and road rage and red lights,
and cut-offs and cuss-outs,
daydreaming of fights.

Our destination is reached,
and our hands are in fists,
we stomp down the halls,
and crash by accident.

Coffee spills, papers scatter,
faces red, eye contact made,
thoughts are racing, anger raising,
a small flame ignites great hate.

We watch the scene
play in our head,
like directing a movie
and take one is red.

It's yelling and screaming,
insulting and punching,
automatic desire,
but solving nothing.

Aren't we lucky
we aren't bound by our thoughts?
We might be tempted,
but slaves we are not.

Aren't we lucky
if take one leads to
mistakes or trouble
we can choose a take two?

"I'm just worried about you after I leave"
He lifted his eyes, hazel, wolf-like, only after he spoke.

She laughed,
curling her bare legs beneath her on his bed, feeling
her wetness. "Don't worry about me"
she said.
"Come here"

He crawled over to her and they lay
holding each other atop the blankets.
She ran her tongue along his back to taste him,
knowing she could never say what she wanted to.

Instead - "I'm just happy to have known you"
whispered into tufts of his blond hair.

She looks at him and wonders if
his long nose and fox eyes exist only for her.
Lovers made her laugh once.
She felt what it was like to touch the stars and share
secrets among frozen vegetables, dancing to
a song that was neither the singing nor the singer.
She thought she understood why the sun rose
in the east, why at a certain degree water forms crystals.
She thought she knew how to hold on and how to let go.
An ego death, a budding,
something so new it was like explaining
orange to a blind man.
His clean hands on the ridge of her spine,
trying to describe him with her fingers, silence exploding
in her, honey burning her tongue.
A bird can only see the world below her nest until
she discovers she has wings.

Lonely nights like this
And up for conversations with the stars
Had one milky way in my drink too many
And enough moons under my feet
To last many big bang theories over again

The stars seemed bored
Just..floating there next to Saturn
And I finally got the courage to ask..
For his constellation
And he said he likes my sun spots
That are resting across my axis

And told him that it must be nice
To be constantly revolving
Around someone else's  own orbit
Well...
And at this point I couldn't help but notice
He was glowing I swear
They can kind of be ***(troids) sometimes

Wow..and he could be a cometian.
Stars are funny that way

The smiling face often lies ,
No one knows , what it hides .
It is easier to curve your mouth ,
Then to let the pain come out .

The smiling face ,my mirror shows
Hides every stories which I know
I deceive others with my cheery facade
As they do the same , they too are flawed .

There are few true smiles ,
Hardly seen much awhile.
But they fade away fast ,
Because happiness do not last .

Please, I beg you
I implore you
To leave me alone

If you're confused
Or had a moment of weakness
An impulse of momentary courage
that will fade quickly
Please don't
Don't do it
Don't come back
For I know you will leave again
with no explanation
other than leave me wondering again
Why
Why  is it always a desire
Instead of a fact

I'd rather have you leave forever
Than come back
And be a lie I can never have

A man I looked up to
Once told me to be careful,
That maybe I could be too much.
Too bold
Too strong
That men may not feel comfortable.
But you see
Women in my world have never been gentle,
Always burnt with too much fervour
To care that you might melt.
You think it is an insult,
That you can coerce me into being more submissive
By the threat of offending men.
Like somehow I am nothing
With the absence of a man's desire.
Like everything about me
Should be channelled into impressing a man
I am yet to meet.
But you don't know that inside I am smiling.
Inside a fire in me burns brighter at hearing
That sometimes my strength makes them uncomfortable.
I am not here so men who tell me I'm prettier when I have less voice,
So men who think it's okay to intimidate me
Whenever they see fit,
In whatever form they wish,
Can feel less unsettled by this supposed threat to their masculinity.
I hope my mind,
My bones and my blood,
Make your safety net
Of a society that breeds and feeds male egotism
A little less secure.
I am not here for your comfort.
I am not here to feed the monster of misogyny inside of you.

Do not tell me to douse my fire
And extinguish these flames
Just because you,
Men like you,
Cannot handle the heat.