One day I wondered what it would be like to **** myself
Not because I wanted to die
But because I wasn't sure that I was living
But I knew if I died
My mother's world would crumble
And if I died
My sisters would have no one to look up to
And if I died
I wondered
Would anything I had done up until now have any meaning?
If I died
Had I done anything up until now that had any meaning?
And I wondered if I ever truly felt alive
Like people describe alive to be
Wind running through your hair, fast paced, quickened heartbeat, running through the streets barefoot, staying after the street lights come on, the "oh my god isn't that just great" moments
So I tried it
I tried to live fast
I tried to be reckless
Tried to experience the moments that took people's breath away
And all I realized was I felt more alive
At home with my family
Felt more alive
Reading a good book in the sun
Felt more alive doing things people said weren't living
Because life is what you make it
And some days I still wonder what it would be like to **** myself
And know the simplest way would to live a life I don't love

If the whole world but a stage be
Whose cast of characters are we,
What genre fits your life story,
A thriller, farce or comedy?
A romance or perhaps maybe
Drama, action, or tragedy?

Would you be the stage manager,
The producer or director?
Would you be the lead character,
Or play a supporting role or
Just appear occasionally,
Happy just an extra to be?

And when the final curtain falls
Will you have given it your all?
Will others demand an encore
Or will they have expected more?
But of the most significance....
How will you rate your performance?

I love it
When you
Kiss me
And everyone
Is watching
Because your
Not afraid
To be seen
With me.

                                                            ­                                                                 ­                                                   I love it when you hug me
                                                              ­                                                                 ­                                                 Like it's beeen years
                                                           ­                                                                 ­                                                    Since you've seen me
                                                              ­                                                                 ­                                                 So warm and wrapped tight.





I love it
When you
Tell me you love me
Because
I feel the vulnerbility in you
As well as myself
And when I reply
You almost always
Hug me
And then kiss me.

                                                            ­                                          
                                                                ­                                   I simply cannot determine
                                                       ­                                            What it is that I love more
                                                            ­                                         The way you hold me
                                                              ­                                        The way you kiss me
                                                              ­                                        The way you love me
                                                              ­                                         But it's okay because
                                                         ­                                              At the end of the day
                                                             ­                                               I love it all.

One day ,
I want to wake
And feel delighted
     to see a new day come by
feel blessed to be alive
feel hopeful , feel appreciative
and not feel disappointed
     that I have to survive today somehow

One day ,
I want to not want someone's else life
not wish to be in someone else shoe
       wish not to be like someone else
be happy with who I am
and fall in love with the life , I've been given
not to feel the despair and the unknown fear

One day ,
I wish I will accomplish
to love myself the way I am
              to be happy with what I have

One day ,
I hope I get to see that day

You disappoint me
time after time again.
It doesn't bother me anymore.
I'm used to it.
Or maybe i wish i was used to it.
Maybe i should stop wishing
that you could be the person
I want.
Maybe one day you'll realize
the damage you have done.
But i don't think you ever will.
Cause time and time again
you never say sorry
when i tell people who you are
i say no he is not like that
he doesn't care what i feel
he doesn't care what hurts me.
He is nothing more than a child
stuck in a mans body.
Doesn't understand the effects of his words
and the earthquakes that he starts.
I am nothing more than a tiny
little house to you,
and you are the volcano
that sits right across from me.