you with all you're ****?
i'm getting bored

Dear Josiah,
I didn't know you well,
I'd met you a few times,
I know your  siblings very well,
They're some of my best friends,

Dear Josiah,
Although I didn't know you,
i see you in the tears of sarah,
in the whimpers of grace,
in the scars on bethany.

Seeing the look on your mothers face,
Seeing tears in your fathers eyes,
A divorced couple,
Sets aside their differences,
For one thing they have in common,

They lost their  son.

Dear Josiah,
I watched your sister grow up,
i watched her try not to care,
To push the feelings out,
But tears,
And cries,
Made there way to her,

i hugged Your crying little brother,
Only ten,
who Has never known tragedy like this,

Dear Josiah,
It wasn't your fault,
But you will live on in the hearts,
Of many.
God bless

my bed,
how do i begin to describe,
the cotton sheets,
fluffy pillows,
and failed art projects,
yes they collect on my bed,
next to half empty water bottles,
that one loose yarn ball,
is where i feel at rest.
i can't help but be drawn to,
my constant resting place,
and it makes it so much easier,
with everyday hardships i must face,
clean clothes,
half scribbled notebooks.
that one book i haven't finished yet.
my laptop,
has all collected where i spend most of my time.
where midnight inspiration strikes.
my bed

It's hard to believe that you exist.
Outside of my own guilt.

I've been there,
I've walked that road,
I've had those feelings,
So many times before,
I've wanted to hurt myself,
Or someone else,
I've felt that pain,
That hate,
And I know,
How hard it is,
To let go of everything you have spent building,
Every nasty feeling,
I've been there,
I've walked that road,
So many times before,
I
Remember when I started punching walls,
Bleeding fist,
Inner anger,
I've been there,
Had those feelings,
I have been angry,
For not doing more,
Don't try and say,
I'm not gonna tell you what happened,
You won't understand,
You have probably never felt these feelings before,
I've been there,
I've walked that road,
We all have one,
A road we walk,
Not particularly knowing where we're going,
In the middle of the night,
Thinking,
What if I don't turn around,
I've felt those feelings,
I've MEMORIZED that road.

if my fingers could scratch past the glass,
to reach your bony hands,
i would never stop trying,
to hug your thinning body,
to rub warmth to your fingers and your soul,
you have shown me love like i have never known before.
i wish i could break the screens,
to get to you,
so that i could somehow save you,
i could be there for you no matter how bad things got,
we could stop fooling with i miss you's
i really want to see you,
if only,
i could get past the
SCREEN

i want to be your knight in shining armor on the nights your wrists are under attack