The stars could be flipped inside out and you could read the wrong part of the newspaper and you'd still laugh at your horoscope or cut it out and show it to someone you love

And everybody hates country music and everybody is sorta quiet when you first get to know them but opens up and is crazy once they get to know you

You might think someone's hot from across the room and if you end up marrying each other it's love at first sight and if he or she is a total **** it's just a coinkeydink

And everyone in the ******* world hates the word coinkeydink

Drinking coffee or tea and liking books doesn't make you a one of a kind human being any more than being able to hold your breath for a minute does

But I still love you because you are special,
just like everybody else.

I managed to lose
my golden ticket
kicked out of the factory
with my sticky chocolate digits

I don't wear a cape
that's black or red
and we both know if I did
it would get stuck on my head

My car doesn't fly
and would probably sink
it's actually my parents'
we can steal it if we're quick

I can't swing a sword
and I can't ride a horse
I'm not prince charming
maybe I can learn to ride a horse

I don't have a point
I am trying to make
I just hope you realize
truth is better than what's fake.

We were totally solid.
You think we'd,
like,
go through a few stages or something?
before we went up in smoke.

I look to you, with my sweaty palms,
                                   back,
                             armpits,
      and of course,
lips.
I look to you with my ungainly feet,
                          bowing,
                    blistered,
      and most of all,
cold.
I speak to you with my uncertain voice,
                        shaky,
               stuttering,
            and hardly,
hopeful.
You with your subtle perfections,
                of voice,
     of spirit,
      and probably,
of heart.
And I think:
Thank God for my grammar.

Do you remember that one time we both just happened to stay up until 4:00 in the morning?
Or that time you tried to walk past me but our small talk got too big and we ended up sitting separated by four thousand miles and an electrical outlet?

Do you remember that one time when our elbows touched for almost a second at dinner, but neither of us said anything?
Or that time I felt like watching that TV show you love and accidentally left my door open and you felt like watching for awhile and punched my arm when I pointed out how a terrorist wouldn't be able to activate an atomic bomb
from
like
four thousand miles underground?

Do you remember how your voice shook with laughter when I told you I was flirting with you?
How it shook like a seismograph on the white cliffs of Dover,
How it shook like a tambourine
Like a dreidel
or a top?

Do you remember how the fire leapt and the mountains slammed and the thunder clapped more fervently than a bunch of liberals watching a mariachi band?
or has my imagination gotten the best of me once again?

Nobody was born today
But you picked up a cake anyway
for five dollars fifty plus tax

Now you're watching
Criminal Minds on a couch made for three
and eating it with your hands

It vaguely occurs to you that
you should be sharing it with someone
or at least put on some **** candles

You're not even hungry
you don't even need to fill a void
you did good today

You hardly even miss her anymore.
You haven't thought about it in weeks.
If you just slept you'd be fine in the morning.

You consider it all
examining the red velvet
stuck under your thumbnail

Maybe you're looking for
a file or a prison shank
sunk beneath the frosting

Or maybe you just need
to make this a Night
The Night of the Cake

It'll blend in
with the others
in a matter of time

But for a few weeks
you'll look back
and remember

you are a member
of those romanticized ranks
those plastic or terracotta statues

Tomorrow you will feed the dog.
And after work you will pick up groceries.
And after groceries you will pay your bills.

But tonight is the Night of Cake.
Tonight
you become a stereotype

An unforgiving consumer
with chocolate-stained hands.

Each elbow edges back a bit
hands grasp the chair arm
Carbon levels in the atmosphere plummet as populations hold their breath in
anticipation

She moves with several smooth staccato shifts
Her hair swings like a tsunami wave
I try not to wave back.

I’ve seen piano keys with jerkier movements.
I’ve felt the world shift before
but never so smoothly.

She starts to stand, in slow-mo though
Even gravity can’t keep its hands off her for very long.

Somehow she strides
She strides!
Under the weight of that greatness

And after all the malarkey
She finally leaves the ******* room.

A vessel for water
hardened soil      
ceramic broken  
forever spoiled.  

But gather with care,
these grounded bits,
and paint upon them
as a soul canvas

You said you want a guy who loves to roll the dice
He might get a six, but mine has twenty sides.
Like Lucy in the Sky you won’t believe your eyes
Like Dory be surprised and forget the other guys

People aren’t something anybody can own but
I heard about a thing called inter-library loan
Run my fingers down your spine
and dog-ear the pages
Our story will be told for ages and ages

Just call me love,
‘cause all you need is me
Must be shortsighted ‘cause you are all I see.

I know no man’s an island,
But I’ve got a big peninsula
Step onto my deck
And maybe we can get molecular

I’m not part of your fandom
I just want to see the show
Got reasons to hold back
Let’s pretend we didn’t know

Call me fire, call me death
I’m a dragon named Smaug and this rap is my breath

I’m sweet and empty inside, if that’s what you’re after
I’ll open right up and you can call me candy rapper

Two sailors navigate a turquoise sea
To stay afloat we made a brittle boat
The ship rides low: we’ve got buckets of glee.
It’s made from sails of laughter, planks of hope

The boldest storm can put away its thunder
Our rolling sails will last through coldest night
The stars will turn their icy orbs and wonder
How we manage to float along alright

But,

Green ocean waves themselves have turned cliche
And god, I keep on dreaming ‘bout that prow
My bottom-dwelling thoughts ruin the day
I want to wet my freezing feet somehow.

So,

I’ll sink the ship and dredge the empty sea
Because I'm so ******* thirsty.

You choose a sepia filter
To match your timeless visage
To match the clothes you've wandered into today
But it is not a selfie.

Your eyes pierce them through their iPhone screens
Your smile is casually not directed towards anyone in particular
Your outfit is recklessly on point
And it is not a selfie.

It is a punch in the gut
to everyone who has ever
said you are not good enough.
It is not a selfie.

The wings by your eyes will go out of style.
The dye in your hair will wash down the drain.
The clothes will wear out and you will take pictures again.

But you have fabricated a moment.
You are smiling towards yourself.
Slap your image onto every social media you know
Next to the supermodels and Kardashians and words of self hatred
This is the fulcrum with which you will lever the world.
This is not a selfie.

Maybe this new year we’ll see a magic zoo
and have a conversation with a magic cockatoo
it might just happen this new year
let’s pretend

Maybe this new year we’ll climb mount everest
live alone on the top if the government will let us
it might just happen this new year
let’s pretend

Maybe
this new year
I’ll love you again

Maybe this new year I’ll find a magic pen
and write magic stories about a magic land
it might just happen this new year
let’s pretend

Maybe this new year my mistakes I will amend
like forgetting and forgiving and locking you in a pen
It might just happen this new year
let’s pretend

Maybe
this new year
I’ll love you again

Maybe this new year we’ll get super fit
and run a marathon with negative splits
It might just happen this new year
let’s pretend

Maybe this new year we’ll get old and won’t remember
what keeps us apart and stops us from being together
It might just happen this new year
let’s pretend.

Maybe
this new year
I’ll love you again

Now is the time to cut your hair short
play in the snow even if you'll get cold feet
Listen to live music
even if it’s bad music
because any art can make you fall in love with its creator
even if it only lasts two minutes.

Now is the time to become attached to people
even if they aren’t perfect for you
and unchain yourself from people
even if they are perfect for you

Because it is time for tomorrows
for realizing your hips and knees crack for a reason
for leaping off the giant’s shoulder
for running fast even though you’ll tire

for climbing to the top of the mountain
so you can see the stars

Tonight we read some poetry,
and I didn’t like it,
and mine was too childish.
And then we talked.
And you were talking in poetry,
and you proved me wrong.

And I realized you’re always talking in poetry,
and that whenever you are happy,
you are proving me wrong.
And that’s a bit messed up,
isn’t it?

Loving you was like parking between the lines in an empty lot at 3:00 in the morning.

Just love yourself, you know, but don't get cocky and save money so you don't starve on the streets but don't be such a ******* greedy *******, and walk with your shoulders straight for once in your life but stop striding around like you own the place, didn't I tell you to start saving money? But after you leave a tip; be frugal not cheap you say i love you much too fast i mean come on romeo and juliet just killed themselves isn't that complete nonesense and in the meantime try to let loose and stop stressing about what you eat i mean it's only food it's not an enemy and you never say you love us anymore and it's breaking our hearts one by one and you really need to be healthier I mean
i love you
and hope you live forever
but ******* will you eat something? You're just skin and bones and my gosh, you need to broaden your horizons but why do you think about all this weird stuff? you need to lighten up and READ more i mean there's so much out there
and why do you get hung up on the little stuff? I mean it's the little thngs that matter you need to set your priorities straight i hope you hate yourself as much as i hate you are you going out again i thought you said you didn't have friends when we said you needed to leave your **** room and by the way you need to stop suppressing other people's beliefs i mean diversity is our strength and you can't let other people tell you how to think and by the way will you stop being a ******* chauvinistic ******* i mean you can't treat people like that and you're probably racist whether you like it or not did i mention you need to eat more? because you're getting fat and you really need to watch your serving sizes but you know it's not how much you eat so much as what you eat and dear, please, that shirt cannot be worn with those pants, you're so adorable when you try to match like this and stop wearing the same two sweaters day in and day out like you're two halves of a mime trying to figure out how to be one.
Did I mention you look fat?

It doesn’t matter what’s inside the jeweled treasure chest.
You won’t unlock it if you know what’s best

I hear a hollow thump when I grab it in my fist
Just enjoy the moment, don’t be a pessimist.

I save up words like
bottlecaps and coins
I use up people like
applejuice and joints
I forget all of it like

If we were to break bread together,
And share it, slice, by slice,
I would want the endpiece.
Because endpieces,
Are also beginningpieces.

I am not an English major
I major in “i love you”
I major in “what’s around that corner?”
I major in “why can’t i?”

My major is the inflection of the voice inside your head.

You said hell would freeze right over
before you left me with a cold shoulder

I guess that's twice it has been proven
Hell is ice cold, completely frozen

Boots 'n' ca-ts! 'n' boots 'n' ca-ts! 'n' boots 'n' ca-ts! 'n' boots 'n' ca-ts!

Boo boot ca-t boo-padoopa ca-ts, boo boot ca-t boo-padoopa ca-ts.

Boot chewy-skir-ts, boot chewy-skir-ts, boot chewy-skir-to-skir-to-to-to skir-ts.

Boo-ts, ca-ts boot-to-to-to ca-ts, boo-ts, ca-ts boot-to-to-to ca-ts,
boo-ts, ca-t ca-t to-to-to ca-t, boots ca-t ca-t to-to-to cat to-to-to

Book a took a cat, book a **** a took a ca-t, book a took a cat, book a **** a took a **** a took a...

Turtles in a river,
Mother and its kit.
Wood stove in a blizzard,
why don’t you google it?

Kayak tipping over,
Mittens newly knit.
Luckless little clovers,
why don’t you google it?

I’m staying inside today, if you please.
I’m staying inside today, leave me in peace.

Pebbles crunching softly,
Lantern left unlit.
Morning grass is frosty,
why don’t you google it?

Field’s cicada army,
Endless laughing fit.
Some song by McCartney,
why don’t you google it?

I’m staying inside today, if you please.
I’m staying inside today, leave me in peace.

Accidental ****-touch,
Waxy candle wick.
Silver greasy lug-nut
why don’t you google it?

You know you're *******, through and through
When you try to write a line or two
And find the you you are writing to
Has changed to a you of a different hue.