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i’ve been thinking a lot
about your hand in mine
the way that our fingers
and palms intertwine

but i think about death
about loss, about worth
i admit that i fear
to return to the earth

where our bodies dissolve
into roots of a tree
and will grow into trunk
then limb, then leaf

but i've heard from a bird
that death will reverse
and your heart will beat hard
like it did at your birth

so hold on for dear life
with your hand in mine
if death makes us let go
it is only for time



© Mike Mortensen
 Oct 2017 Marisa Lu Makil
Middy
You can't take it
You can't live with it
The pain is too much
The kids at school
They keep hurting you
Or maybe it was your father
Maybe your mother
Maybe they're both dead
Like how you will be soon
Maybe you're in love with abusers
Maybe you are simply sad
But either way
You can't take it anymore

You take a rope from the attic
You grab a gun from the cuboard
You steal a knife from the kitchen
You're at the bridge over the river
You're on a railway with a train
Wherever you are
Whatever you have
It doesn't matter now

You take a rope from the attic
The kids at school
They taunt you and laugh
They say they wish you were dead
Well their wish is coming true
You're suffocating
You're silent
You're gone

You grab a gun from the cuboard
Safety is off
You're in your room
You whisper a goodbye
To the father who hurt you
To the brother who loves you
BANG
The shot can be heard for miles
You're gone

You steal a knife from the kitchen
Your mother's prying eyes
Who breaks your heart
With hateful words
You're in your bathroom
You hold the knife to your wrist
Your lifeline is bleeding out
The blood is on the white floor
You're gone

You're on a bridge
There's a cold and fast flowing
River of tears and sorrow
Your mother is gone
Your father is gone
Time for you to go
You leave your other family
Who are grieving with you
You jump
You fall
You're gone

You're at a railway with a train
Ready to hit you with pain
It wouldn't be the driver's fault
It was the abuser
You thought loved you
But you were wrong
You are hit by the train
It stops with your broken heart
You're gone

Where is the rope burn?
It burns your parents
They weep and wail
They lost their child
They're sunk into a sea of sadness
They read the note
They beg dear god above
" why were we not enough? "

Who did you shoot?
Your brother's chest
He's staring silently
At his sibling's dead body
As he stutters and sobs
He wonders
" why was I not enough? "

Who was stabbed?
Why your sister
She doesn't know who to talk to
She doesn't know who can help
As she screams for the neighbors
As your heartbeat stops
" why was I not enough? "

Who drowned?
The family you left behind
Your uncle is silent
Your aunt is shocked
Your cousins, your grandparents
They cant believe it
" why were we not enough? "

Where is the wound?
It bleeds in your friends' hearts
No matter how many you have
Or rather had
They can't stop crying
They can't stop thinking
" why were we not enough? "

Your name is in the papers
You're on the front covers
The world is full of tears
The news reporter is upset
There's a book with your name
There's ****** roses on your grave
Marked with your name

You stop
You think
You put away the rope
You put the gun back
You replace the knife
You walk away from the bridge
You run off the railway
You hide your tears in the rain
But you think
Think, think.
Maybe you can live one more day
Or two days, three days,
Four days, five days, six days
A week or two
A month or more
A year or so
Maybe forever
You won't take away the pain by killing yourself. All you'll do is pass it on
People care, I promise they do.
If no one does, I do.
 Oct 2017 Marisa Lu Makil
Alice
we were born into a sky full of colour and stars

when grey would turn red, and
when lips would touch and people would kiss,
and it would cause heavenly earthquakes to stop and lightning to strike,
into the almighty home that we call earth.

we were born into a world of pure, honest and heavy love,

and now we grow up in a world of hate and ******,
where the stars mean nothing and the moon doesn’t shine,
when the world is on it’s knees and it’s begging you to stop,
we live our hell on earth now and our heaven is a myth,
because even the brightest colours can’t ****** the darkness
that we produced ourselves,
and when you kissed me just for the sake of it,
i felt the blood on your lips, as my heart tore you apart
and the world brought you down to the floor,
this is what you did to me
she screamed as she roared fire
through the colourless sky and cut your throat like you were nothing,
and that is all we are
when the earth and the end collided
so did we,
we watched the world burn in needful horror,
and we died silently, hand in hand and felt the fire that we had
created, consume us.

we fell back into the ground that killed us,
and we realised that when everything went black, silent and still,
the stars could never save us, and the colour could never intrude,
we born into this world of hate and ******,
and all the love we had ever felt, wasn’t even true.
 Oct 2017 Marisa Lu Makil
Jazeera
She said don't
But he didn't mind
He walked right at her
With a devil's intention.

She wanted to scream
And call her parents.
But he threatened her.
Her silent tears shed.

By each step he took
Her heart beat rapidly
As if she ran a thousand miles
To get away from here
She just closed her eyes
And took the torture.

She always wore a mask then
A happy one for the world.

She never uttered a word to anyone
Until now,
She opened herself to me
I was shocked
Couldn't do anything to fight
Just the prayers
To keep her strong.

I've seen several brave girls
But none of them replaced her.

Keep fighting,  my friend.
Girls are not toys. Society needs to respect every girls.
Tonight  I will cry
Because I fell terrible inside
Loving you is a mistake
That I can’t skip
I’m stuck on you  like
Everyday I’m wanting you
But you never gave me anything
In return
A crush arrives like a crush
at first
in the literal sense

It surprises you and
tackles you
like a wild animal

But the word really doesn’t represent
it completely
in the fullest way

Because when a tree falls on you
it hurts
with a sharp pain

When you are the one falling
for someone
it’s a dull throbbing desire

While a tree can be easily removed
a crush
you can only wish for its departure

Then again, you don’t actually want it to leave.
sometimes i feel too much
sometimes i feel too little
i wish i could stay in that happy place
that lies right in the middle

when i feel too much
it's a torrent of emotion
a downpour of epic proportion
and i pray for it to end

yet when it does i don't feel enough
i'm numb, frozen, depressed.
I then pray for this to end
and i'd do anything to feel again

so i'm stuck in this happy limbo
never feeling quite right
like goldilocks in the three bear's house
i can't sleep at night
We
were
strangers
for far to long,

We
had ears
for the same song,

We
weren't sure
what was right,
but we knew what was wrong,

Good to know a place
to belong.
I don't know why I write poetry
all I know is that writing poetry makes me rich
enjoying -- not possessing
the ever-expanding universe
without fear of inflation

in the sky --
white clouds
singing larks
whispering wind
the tender moon and twinkling stars

on the ground--
mountains hills plains gullies
lush green red brown yellow
oceans streams lakes ponds
splashing gurgling burbling
the blooming flowers
the vacillating leaves
children's innocent laughter
cats dogs chickens ducks birds
jumping chasing croaking singing
all are parts of my life's fortune

of course, there too are
ferocious dark clouds
harrying eagles
howling storms
withering flowers
roaring guns
and piercing screams
the shadows that lend dimension
to poetry and life

In fact, I don't write poetry
poetry writes me
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