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Jul 2014 · 1.3k
Untitled
ThingsWillChange Jul 2014
I don't want to cry tonight
I don't want to hate myself tonight
I don't want to hurt tonight
I don't want to die inside tonight

Depression
Self hate
Paranoia
Dying inside

The tears won't fall
The hate won't stop
The fear won't fade
The feeling won't leave

Tomorrow is the day I don't want to spend choking back a sob
Tomorrow is the day I don't want to spend judging myself
Tomorrow is the day I don't want to spend fearing the others
Tomorrow is the day I don't want to spend dead

Tomorrow is when I spend the day with friends
Tomorrow is when I spend the day with family
Tomorrow is when I spend the day one year older
Tomorrow is my birthday

I don't want to silently cry while my friends are asleep
I don't want to grab the razor and drag it across my skin while my family is asleep
I don't want to fear a new day while the world is asleep
I don't want to die while the night is new

Please for tomorrow stop the tears
Please for tomorrow stop the judging
Please for tomorrow stop the fear
Please don't let me die tomorrow

I'll be thirteen tomorrow
I'll be thirteen on July 25th
I'll be thirteen at 3:30PM
I'll be fine tomorrow,

Right?
Jul 2014 · 462
Untitled
ThingsWillChange Jul 2014
There's a girl
Who sits in the back of the class
She gets good grades 
She has plenty of friends
She smiles
There's a girl
Who sits in her room
She slices her skin
She hates herself
She cries
The two girls are the same people
Her smile is her mask
Shielding others from seeing who she is
Little do they know
She's dying
Jul 2014 · 625
Metaphor
ThingsWillChange Jul 2014
Poem
She lay awake in the darkness of night
Waiting for the noises to fade away
Waiting for the people to fall asleep
Then the time comes when all is still
When all Is quiet and asleep
She grasps the box and opens the lid
She selects one of her trusted friends
Shaking hands, beating heart
Waiting for the fires to start
They begin
Skin and metal collide
Drag, slice, cut
Burning fires
Relaxing sensation
Beautiful crimson beads
For a moment there's peace
It fades
Just one more
Why not?
One turns to two
Two turns to ten
Ten turns to twenty
Addiction
There's no way out, no way to escape
Just fire
Fire is all she's ever known
Fire
Now she does not burn
She cuts
It's all a metaphor, isn't it?
Life is just a metaphor
Isn't it?
It's just a metaphor, isn't it?
Jul 2014 · 480
Questions
ThingsWillChange Jul 2014
7/8/3030
8:11 PM

Why aren't you running?
Why aren't you hiding?
You're just standing there!

Can't you feel the rumble?
Can't you smell the smoke?
You're not doing anything!

Am I the only one?
Am I alone?
You don't even care!

Am I insane?
Is this all in my head?
Some one please!

Why are you staring?
Why won't you help me?
I'm scared!

How can I tell what's real?
How can I tell what isn't?
Maybe I can't!

Is this a dream?
Is this reality?
It might be something else entirely!

What's happening to me?
How would you know anyways?
You're just a child.
The third poem in The End.
Jul 2014 · 578
The Beginning
ThingsWillChange Jul 2014
7/7/3030
8:22 AM

Can you hear the warning?
It roars.

Can you feel the ground?
It shakes.

Can you smell the fear?
It's contagious.

Can you taste the death?
It's coming.

Can you see the chaos?
It's here.

Goodbye old world.
Poem Two in The End Collection, A Story Formed by Poems
Jul 2014 · 543
Untitled
ThingsWillChange Jul 2014
7/5/3030
10:08 PM


The end
Is near
Why can't you see?
My dear?

Open your eyes
My dearest darling
You can't run from it
Though it may seem alarming

Lies and greed among
All these strangers
Can't they see?
We're all traitors

You can run
You can hide
But trust me
I've tried

You cannot
Escape
What this is
It's fate
This is the first poem in a collection of poetry I am writing about the end of the world. It's a story told through poetry.
Jun 2014 · 791
From Friend To Foe
ThingsWillChange Jun 2014
On that day,
On that very day,
Somewhat,
Seventy years ago.

From the train,
You dangled,
Almost there hang in there,
Buck.

Almost there,
Stretch and reach,
Grab my hand,
We'll be reunited soon.

Creak and grunt,
Crack and scream,
Panic,
Fear.

Fingers collide,
Slipping through,
Rail snaps,
Fall.

That scream you screamed,
Terrified as you fall,
Farther and farther,
Screams.

"Bucky!"
"Steve!"
My screams your screams,
Gone.

Impact,
Injuries,
No light,
No arm.

Dead,
Dead in the snow,
Dead in the mountians,
No.

Seventy years past,
Seventy years ago,
Seventy years later,
Seventy years now.

A man,
Gun in hand,
Shaggy hair,
Determined face.

A man,
All in black,
Mask on face,
Metal arm.

My friend,
My foe,
My savior,
My killer.

I could never fight,
The one who gave me hope,
You gave me a chance,
Even when no one would.

I'm not gonna fight you,
I'm not gonna hurt you,
"Cuz I'm with ya till the end of the line,
Pal."

Now it's my turn to fall,
And your turn to watch,
Our turn all over again,
To watch in fear.

You gave me a life,
You gave me a brother,
You gave me a friend,
Why can't I return the favor?

You protected me,
I protected you,
You fought me,
I stayed with you.

From friend to foe,
We remain,
From friend to foe,
We stayed.
Inspired by Captain America First Avenger and Winter Soldier
Jun 2014 · 626
Thank you
ThingsWillChange Jun 2014
Thank you,
For always being there,
Even when times were rough.

Thank you,
For your time and patience,
Even hen it was wearing thin.

Thank you,
For being a friend,
Even though I don't know you.

Thank you,
For listening to my story,
Even when I didn't want you to read on.

But do you?
Really want this?
A girl who has scars?

A girl who's been labeled?
Cutter and shredder?
Bisexual and bipolar?

You took her in,
Gave her support,
Mended the scars.

You helped her,
Fixed her broken wings,
Now she flies.

Thank you so very much,
For saving her,
For saving me.
A free verse poem dedicated to my amazing friends and fans on movellas.com
Jun 2014 · 1.2k
Do you know what it's like?
ThingsWillChange Jun 2014
Do you know what it's like?
To sit alone, overlooked and hurt?

Do you know what it's like?
To cry yourself to sleep every night?

Do you know what it's like?
To be broken and bruised, ignored and confused?

Do you know what it's like?
To die die every day, and yet have no regain?

Do you know what it's like?
To be told your hated every single day?

Do you know what it's like?
To be hurt both mentally and physically by the ones you hold dear?

Do you know what it's like?
To be ignored and scarred?

Do you know what it's like?
To see a sliver of hope, it then to be ripped away?

Do you know what it's like?
To feel as if you could never love or be loved again?

Do you know what it's like?
To cut and beat and shred?

Do you know what it's like?
To live a half life?

Do you know what it's like?**
To be me?
Do you?
Jun 2014 · 3.7k
Cuts
ThingsWillChange Jun 2014
The room is empty,
The air is still,
Nothing but me,
My contempt.

It's cold,
Smooth,
Sharp,
Uncontrolled.

I turn the killer,
Over in my hands,
I turn the breaker,
The thriller.

I wrap my fingers,
Over the handle,
Open,
It lingers.

Fair skin,
No marks,
No scars,
This what would've been.

Press,
Glide,
Cut,
Regrets.

Drip drop,
Red,
Blood,
No stop.

Pain,
Mental,
Physical,
No gain.

Sharp breaths,
Gasps for air,
Bad thoughts,
Deaths.

Back to reality,
Realization,
Wounds now scars to come,
No morality.

The blade,
Not the killer,
The one who holds it
The killer betrayed.

Just one,
A single burning cut,
All this hurt,
What have I done?
A poem about cutting.
May 2014 · 414
Asleep
ThingsWillChange May 2014
I lay awake,
In the room,
Darkness surrounds,
Encasing,
Enclosing.

Trapped,
In the room,
No escape,
From the suffocation,
The darkness.

Light,
Shines at the end,
Of a long corridor,
Like a beacon,
Pointing me to sleep.

Walk towards,
The light,
I fall,
Falling,
Falling.

I slip,
Deeper,
And deeper,
Drifting
To sleep.

The light fades,
Immersed in pure shadows,
Now I am gone,
Gone, gone, gone
Gone.

The weary eyes,
Tired Arms,
Slowing breathes,
Waiting dreams,
Have taken over.

My dreams,
They wait,
For me,
I am,
Asleep
May 2014 · 6.4k
The Three Birds
ThingsWillChange May 2014
Inspired by Divergent

The three birds,
Watch them fly away.
From the pages of the books,
Which almost lead them astray.

The Three Birds,
Soar through the sky.
Only to arrive,
In the blink of an eye.

The Three Birds,
Now circle around a girl..
They swoop down quickly,
Then unfurl.

The Three Birds,
Now rest upon her collar.
Resembling the girl's,
Brother, Mother and Father.
May 2014 · 417
My Special Place
ThingsWillChange May 2014
My Special Place (inspired by Movellas)

Here in my special place I can be,
Someone else,
Someone I've always wanted to be,
That someone is my real true self.
Here in this amazing world,
No one can judge me,
Here in my special place I can create a new world,
What I think the world should be.
I can be free to write,
And free to read,
Here my stories are told without great fright,
In my special world I don't have the need,
To be some one other than me,
Some one different,
Someone I only pretend to be,
Here I am brilliant,
In my special place,
Here I can be,
Exactly me.
May 2014 · 11.3k
Eclipse
ThingsWillChange May 2014
Inspired by Wendy Mass' Every Soul A Star

I stare up at the deep blue sky,
At the sun and moon up so high,
A pitch black mass,
A hot yellow gas,
Float side by side,
Then they collide,
Casting the moon's silhouette,
So I begin to forget,
Of all the difficulty,
There was previously,
And began to accept,
I decided not to intercept,
Then he slipped his hand into mine,
And I felt just fine.
A poem inspired by Wendy Mass' Every Soul A Star.
May 2014 · 3.5k
Love
ThingsWillChange May 2014
Love
Is like a rollercoaster
Spotlight shines hot like a toaster
Ups and Downs
Overs and Arounds
Heartbreaks and Heartaches
You always find a way through your mistakes
<3
May 2014 · 780
Lonely Child
ThingsWillChange May 2014
I feel so alone
In the big, big world
The true me will be shown
I need to let go and face the real world

I have to let go
I have to sort things out
Everything is moving so slow
I have to get out

I have to swim to the surface
This feeling is like drowning
But I have to resurface
Everyone around me is breathing

I can see them
Drawing in breath
I'm not one of them, not a gem
I can't breathe like they can, this is like death

I'm suffocating
In my sorrow
I'm suffering
Dreading living tomorrow

I'm not suicidal
Though sometimes I wish I was
But this is survival
I will live life with no clause

I am all alone
No one understands the way I feel
You say you do, but no, I am alone
You don't understand, my walls are like steel

I am lonely
yet I am afraid
I am the one and only
Don't try coming to my aid

Youwon't anyways
You don'tcare
Your sympathy won't help Anyways
When you became my friend you should've been aware

Of the burden that comes with me
I cry and I scream
Just like a banshee
My tears are a constant stream

I'm suffering
I feel like I'm dying
I'm drowning
I feel helpless

Why do you continue?
Why are you Reading my misery?
Go ahead contribute
I will soon be history

Why are you reading?
You don't care anyways.
Why are you pleading?
It won't help anyways

So let go
Live your life
Go on thrive and grow
You don't need me in your life

Besides
I'm just a lonely girl
Sitting on one of the sides
Of your screen, I'm no pearl

Just a ugly freak
Who is alone
Just a depressed geek
Who is alone

So Go on
Live your life
Fulfill your dreams which you have drawn
This is the way I feel this is my way of life

Deal with it
Just Like I had to
For 12 years I have put up with this ****
I'm sorry If this offended you

I still love you all
You have a place in my heart
The old me is not here at all
My name is Mattie I have been torn apart

This is all
Goodbye my friends
I love you all
Stay strong my friends
My feelings
ThingsWillChange May 2014
A free verse poem by me!*

Some nights I can't sleep,
My mind is consumed,
With the thought of how,
Much easier it would be,
If you were my side.

For you,
The one who put me in this state,
Is not here,
By my side,
Though I wish you were.

For you,
Are the cause,
Of my sleepless nights,
My restless nights,
My dreamless nights.

I am lying here,
Awake in my bed,
The covers pulled up to my chin,
Curled into,
A ball.

Lying here,
Wanting,
Waiting,
Wishing,
Needing.

You.
My feelings towards someone special, someone who probably doesn't feel the same...

— The End —