I know.

I know today is looming larger
Than the lump in your throat
That you swallowed last night as you
Stood in the shower,
Trying to wash away the feeling
Of everything-is-going-wrong
And replace it with whispers of
It's no big deal
You don't want them to know that
It hurts
Because then the questions will come
As you press your lips together
And blink back the tears that scream
I do not want to be here today.
But even louder is the whisper in your heart saying
You did this last week
You can do it again.
Maybe it's the dead of night right now and that's ok.
Because there is something beautiful
About the night sky
The infinite amount of stars
Match the amount of times you keep trying
The fact that it never ends
seems as impossible as making it through today
But here's a secret; you aren't alone.
You aren't the only shower-crier  
Please stop for a second      
Reach your hand through your warm skin
And find your heart, where it beats without question.
Tie the beats to your fingers so that you don't forget who you are.
You were created by the same man
Who made the stars.
Not cut from any pattern.
Made from the strongest materials.                    
Today is hard, I know.
But you can open your eyes.
The sun will rise soon enough, but you might as well stargaze while you're waiting.
I know you will be ok.

I know the pain you feel is deep,
your want from life is simple peace.
And though I cannot guarantee,
please listen closely, as I speak.

Presently you stroll alone,
searching for a hand to hold.
You feel your sorrow in your bones,
in harshest sun, you still feel cold.

Pre - dawn, however, is darkest night
that must be followed by morning light.
I pray you won't give up the fight,
the universe will set things right.

I know at times, it seems unclear
that happiness is always near.
But wholly I believe my dear,
someday soon, you'll find some cheer.

The poor get poorer,
The rich get richer.
           In some cases it’s a debate
             harsh situations Fluctuate
When money speaks, power escalates.

Sometimes…
The poor gets tougher,
The rich gets fragile against danger.

Often times…
Harsh situations make us stronger,
Easy life makes us weaker.

How to be unhappy all the time:

it's not hard
to be sad
and angry
and unpleased with the world
because the way you see the world
is how you feel
but the way you feel
is how you see the world

and you think,
if all you see,
is the happiness
of your friends
and family
in their life's
and loves
you'd be
inspired
to be happy too

but all I see
is the lack of love
in my life
the lack of someone
to remind it's alright

all I see
is the girl whose found her love
and they are happy together
and I'm happy for them too
I'm just sad for myself

all I see
is the girl with her girlfriend
desperately in love
and I'm happy for them
I'm just sad for myself

all I see
are my friends happy
in everything that happens
and I'm happy for them
I'm just sad for myself

I know wallowing
in self pity
can't get me far
but it's hard to be
happy
when the world
doesn't feel that way.

-r.y.s

I want winter
to be over.

It reminds me
of the cold
and bitter
that is my soul.

I need spring
to come again.

To push me
out of the cold
and be happy
unfreeze my soul.

-r.y.s

Falling in love the first time is easy,
you don't understand the risk.
It's like,
learning how to swim as a child,
you're unaware that you're unafraid of the unknown.
Once you're an adult, and understand the concept of how to swim,
and the possibility of drowning,
you realize,
it's terrifying.

The plum I’ve been waiting
to ripen
is a bit past ripe; in the fruit bowl,
the bananas speckled brown;
the lemons show no sign of age.

Monday morning I forget the plum,
which now may be a bit too sweet.
Thursday,
I buy fresh produce
on the way home.
I get a call
from my father
about my mother.

Forgotten,
beneath brighter flora,
the plum
in royal colors
sits in the bottom of the fruit bowl.

At home
two Google searches:
what to make with past ripe plums
why don’t I cry when someone dies