So
here I lay in my bed, 7:55 in the morning
And I have to go to work at 9
just like all the days before
everything is the same
except you're gone
so in other words, nothing is the same
as the sun sets here and rises there
your days are endlessly filled
to the brim
yet mine feel so empty
it's the feeling of
standing on a train station platform
and watching the trains come and go everyday
mostly go.
so although I miss you more than I dare to say,
I know my train is coming soon
and then I know nothing will ever be the same
and it's scary
because maybe someday
we'll end up on the same platform
at that old train station
and I can't decide if it would be better
to see you again
nothing the same as it was,
or to keep you as a fond memory
in my head.

good news.
the world still spins around the universe
sunset and sunrise
just like before.
everything still seems to move on
the way it always has.
even without you here.
even when it seems
the world inside me has stopped
the world around me never stops moving
never missing a beat
day after day
slamming into you
knocking the air from your lungs
kissing your open mouth on the way out
reminding you
that just as easily as something,
someone
can be brought into your life,
they can be taken out.

i linger on the corner of moving on
and forgetting
and the pathways look all too similar.
down one,
the stars dance with the moon
cloaking the world in darkness.
down the other,
street lamps tease the midnight air,
flickering on
and off,
hiding what's just around the corner
and in the end, it doesn't matter which road i take
because while i linger on the corner of moving on
and forgetting
i still wear your watch to work.

I unpacked my boxes
In the comfort of my new home

the comfort

it was real & I unpacked my boxes; good
and bad and I let them spill out
everywhere & I loved the way that my
belongings looked beautiful
and belonging

and it was happy

I opened up the blinds and I loved it even
more
and I decided to stay
But the sad fact

It was a rental, the landlord your emotions
and the currency
was not
sunlit windows

the world will never tell you
there are stars in your eyes
that it cannot compete with.
instead, it will tel you
"the sky is the limit,"
because as soon as you realize that the clouds
are merely closed doors to the heavens
it can no longer hold you in.
there is no force on earth strong enough
to stop the power behind your unspoken words,
to keep you from unlocking the gates of heaven,
and from breaking the roots of your past
that cannot contain the tumultuous fires in your heart.
and there are flowers in your thoughts
that reach infinitely higher than the depths of despair.

and yet the world will always tell you
that you will never be good enough,
when you already are.