Hovering,
grey slow mist,
I hover slowly remembering each word
that was plucked from your mouth the night the
clouds came.
These words,
stolen from my heart.
Mind, makes decisions
followed by regret.
I watch you walk away,
as I’ve done so many times before.
My thoughts linger
watching you become nothing
but a memory made by
silver linings, and golden dreams.
I fear that even if I speak you won’t hear me,
tangled in poison ivy thorns,
I’ve lost you again.
Wounds open, again.
I take a moment
to reject this pain.
Fading as I drift away.
Breathe deep, a weight is lifted.
It hurts though, I’m half
of the whole that we were.
Here I am,
Caught between the shutter of
Memory, I hear a blue jay
Flapping its cobalt wings.
Clicking at me like your warnings
Of how you'd leave if I
Didn't love you the right way.
If I would only begin to want you
Out of the memories,
Out of right now, and into
The future.
The signs were there,
foreshadowed by cold,
distant mornings, crippled
by your escaped gaze.
Chilling my spine, your thoughts,
and desires left me,
in a state of hallowed truth.
Your beauty held back by
selfishness, my jealousy
poisoning your innocent
smile.