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I never realized until now.
How much you really changed me.
How much you really hurt me.

Its when I think about loving someone else.
I can only think of running away.
No matter how much I feel.

Even after everything.
I'm still trying to erase the memories you left behind.
Your shadow looms in my every step.

That maybe I do not deserve to love.
And maybe I never will.
I want to believe that I am wrong.

But not even the cards I shuffle in my hands will be able to prove me otherwise this time.

-Kore
aha
Will my best ever be enough?

Will I ever heal?

Do I have to live the rest of my life like this?

Do I have to keep feeling like this?

How will I ever love again?

How can I ever trust anyone after what you've done?

Where did I go wrong?

Where is the happiness I so want to feel?

When did it start falling apart?

When will I finally leave this all behind?

Why do I feel nothing?

Why do I feel everything all at once?

What am I doing here still?

What did I do to deserve this?

Can I ever feel normal again?

Can I actually live my life, like this?

Who is at fault for this?

Who is there to blame other than myself?

Am I ok?

Am I perfect enough?

Will I ever be satisfied

Will I ever be happy again?

The questions only keep growing in the cell of disarray that is my mind.

Every single one fall on deaf ears.

-Kore
Spain without the s
Perhaps I was never meant to be the hero of my story.
Heroes always die.
But I am still here
I can only wonder when it will be over.

Or if I am to be the tragic antagonist
In the story of another.
But one thing I can confirm
Is that heroes are never happy.

And regardless of whether I am
I certainly will meet a tragic end.
That's always how these things go.
I don't think my story was written with a happy ending in mind.

And thus one day
Just when things feel like they're finally
Finally going right for me.
I'm going to collapse again.

Maybe it is time for me to accept that things won't get better
and that they're only going to get worse from here.

-Kore
Tragic Comedy kinda beat.
I am shattered.
Just like anyone else.

But it does not mean that I am far gone.
All I need to do is gather the pieces.

When I find them all eventually.

-Kore
off meds right now
You and me
You promised me.
Take my hand and run away
With me.

And I know that I'll never be
Less of me when I'm with you.
You know me as I know you
Better than we could ever know.

I promise you we'll get out of here.
We'll be happier
Nobody knows what's hidden there
I'm begging you to let time pass.

For one day we'll be rid of where
The things that we wish would disappear.
If you stay and I stay.
I promise you nothing can stop us both.

So please look at me.
I'm never leaving you're not alone.
So please keep your eyes ahead of us.
Please promise me that you won't break this one.

Don't leave me here alone again
I wont let you sink and fade.
Take my hand and let time pass.
Hold on to me, hold on to me.

I'll bring us twice ahead of time where we can finally heal and mend our fissures littering our every touch.

-Kore
I'm sorry you felt that way, I'll be better for the both of us.
The pain never sets in
and I hope it never will.

But when midnight strikes
and my vision starts to shift.

No more comforting voices
to hold and soothe me.

No more reassurance
no more distractions.

Its at these hours of the night
that I can feel it staring bullets at my back.

And everything that's happened simply starts to collapse.

What's left of my sentient mind can only convulse
as I relive things that are better left unknown.

The misfortune in every coming of age
who would've guessed.

All I can wish at these times is that I were eternally dead.

-Kore
Pain
  Apr 2021 Persephone Dagenhart
N
Bloodstains on the white carpet
She lies supine, gaze fixed on the ceiling
Smothered by an infinite ocean of red
Never to be seen again
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