It’s a confession
I don’t know single thing about you

But I think of you in every minutes
When will the universe decide to make our fate?

Commitment.

Who says it’s going to be easy?
It’s not, and never be easy.

When you commit to someone, that means the world is not about you anymore. You’re no longer the main character. There will be him.

When you commit to someone, you don’t wake up to scroll Instagram, you will have someone to be updated.

When you commit to someone, you will arrange your schedules, there will be no time for you to be selfish for yourself, you will share what you have with him.

When you commit to someone, you will try hard to connect with him, and that means you need to adjust things, and maybe you lose yourself in it.

When you commit to someone, you will not jog by yourself, maybe he will accompany you or busy in your kitchen, making you a breakfast.

When you commit to someone, you will feel love, but you need to return the same amount of love to him, or even bigger.

And that hurts.
That’s not an easy job.

What if she listened to me?
What if she took everything seriously?
What if she knew I would be a mess without her?
What if she wasn’t selfish?
What if she could be saved?

It’s fun to do whatever I like, to feel whatever I want to feel, but there are days I have this longing feeling of certain emotion, I can’t tell what it is, but it’s closed, locked, and no one, not even me, could find the key.

I don’t think I will survive
I don’t think I am able to be strong for myself
I don’t think my mind would tolerate another hurricane
I don’t think my heart could work under my consciousness

If I think about this life maybe I don’t feel anymore

It’s hard to see this world when you don’t want to see anything in it.

The only thing you want is to make this world less scary.

But this world will never give you the second chance to make everything right.