I'm not quite sure where we were
Maybe the tunnels by the creek
Or maybe the canyons on the west side
Those details are minor
Because what I remember
Is my head on your chest
And your whisper in my ear

You told me we'd figure it all out
Someday, this would all make sense
But I wasn't so focused on your words
As I was remembering your scent in my hair

Eventually my heart slowed
I feel as if it's been racing for days
And my breaths became more even
As your chest rose and fall

What a feeling peaceful bliss is
Or maybe it'd be more appropriate
To call it ignorance
To think that maybe we were made for each other

I awake and darkness surrounds me
What a surprise, it's 3am
My heart sinks a little
And a slow chill envelopes me
As I realize you're not there, you never were
It was just a dream

This is the point I get to time and time again
My fingers pulsate
                   My breathing quickens
                                    My heart tightens
because we just can't let our cynicism go
You see, everyone leaves
It's a fact
And just like the leaves on the deciduous trees
I was never meant to stay

And the more fond I grow of your company
The closer we get to that breaking conclusion
And instinctually
And hopelessly
I hold on for dear life
Because why must things be this way
Why can't our days consist of shy smiles
And matching coffee drinks
And hands held lightly
With your gaze being my favorite morning memory
I crave you

But timing is everything
And no one really gets what they want
It's not like we'll make it out alive, anyway

My mind won't stop
And as I lay in bed
With silence as my only companion
And my eyes transfixed on the ceiling
I can't help but wonder
Or maybe even hope
That somewhere on this bright night
You're a little restless too

Have you ever felt alone in a crowd of people?
Well I'm here and I can't quite make out the sounds
Faces rush around me, I can't catch a glimpse
Everything's moving so fast, and here I am so still
I blink my eyes, and everything changes
Oh where did this feeling of longing grow from?
It's like I'm moving in slow motion
I try to move one foot in front of the other
I look from side to side
Is anyone there? Can anyone hear me?*
Trying to catch a glimpse of the one who might save me
But all I see is blank glances, dead eyes
There's no one there, there never was
Just me and my shallow, empty heart

From the ashes I have risen
Like a Phoenix I have flown
I rise past the oceans and mountains
Up beyond the clouds and the stars
Follow the second light to the right
And straight to my memories I go
Back to the sun shining bright
The creek humming sweetly
With shadows dancing across your face

You almost hid our impending doom
Even now I can't help but find you beautiful
I watch as you grab her small hands
And just like a strange sort of deja vu
You pick up the pieces of us
And toss them at her feet

Your words are still cruel
I shudder at the thought
With a slight pang in my chest
That's the thing about scars
They never truly fade

But something is different
Almost out of place
I just don't seem to recognize
The girl with her hands to her face

Erupting from inside of her
Is words I can hardly make out
With shoulders heaving with heavy sobs
Please stay

Now I feel stoic
No longer do hot tears adorn my cheeks
And as you turn your back to me
My shoulders do not quiver
And my hands lay calmly at my side
For it is such an odd thing
To look upon the person you used to be

As I let escape
One last little sigh
I spread my wings high
And with my gaze forward
I never looked back

You can make me feel like everything I touch
turns to gold
You can make me feel like I’m nothing more
than the dirt beneath your soles
And I’m still wondering how just one person
Can be so beautiful and cold

The wind is brisk against my face
The leaves crunch beneath my feet
The colors are a dancing swirl around me
Haven't I been here before?

I walk these empty streets
With nothing but my thoughts
Fighting a war inside my head
Just like they have all those times before

It's funny how fast a year goes by
All those prologoned decisions we've postponed
Are suddenly at our doorstep waiting
I'm still lost, waiting to be found

But I've grown fond of the nostalgia
And the summer's indecision
Because when life has no real consequence
It's hard not to enjoy the ride

But everything has an ending
And how naive I was to think
That all of these delayed choices
Wouldn't catch up to me

And that's the thing about hearts
They're fragile just like glass
You can pretend the crack isn't there
But over time it shatters all there was

I said I'd have it all figured out
I said I needed just a little more time
But maybe the truth of it all
Is that I've known all along
That the ones who ignite our soul the most
Are not who we spend our lives with

It's been raining all day
And how fitting it seems
We knew it'd happen eventually
So why am I having trouble breathing?

I watch you fall through emotions
Like the rolling thunder outside
You try to understand my mind
But oh, I've broken your heart so

I'm not sure what delusion I was in
That this wouldn't be a messy conclusion
Or that I could somehow make you understand
That loving someone doesn't mean they're best

You're no good and I know it
I'm no good though I've tried
But your touch is like ******
Toxic as it seems
It takes me higher and higher

And I've played these games for far too long
Running away from a truth I've known
So how can I be so surprised
That you lash out and scream 'why'

I dream about the day years from now
When I run into you on the street
You'll have her hand in yours
And I'll be alone
We'll catch eyes, and for a brief moment
We'll go back to those times of love and loss
But then we'll smile, and casually walk on

And that, dear man, is why I can't find the words to speak
I know this is really the end

Darkness has always followed me
Entranced by my every step
It curls its lips
And cackles a little
As the flames of my existence begin to burn

I plead
      I beg
            I cry
Please just lead me to the light!
But still I'm warmed by its embrace
The breath of it's shadow leaving scars behind

And then one day
I found a bit of courage
And with my shoulders square
From my soul erupted
Darkness why do you love me so?!
                   Why do you haunt my thoughts
Why do you lurk in the crevices of my mind
                  Why do you dig your claws within me
Why won't you let me be free

And it shook its head
With a hint of sorrow
And solemnly replied
My dear, don't you see?
I am found inside of *you