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Isaac Jun 2014
Hey you
Yeah you
The man in the mirror
Well not exactly
More like a boy
In between
Yes that's what you are
In the middle
Too old to have fun like in past not again
Too young to do this, right here, there and then
Right in the middle
Not of age but the coming of it
The time to complain
To act older than you are
and then younger than you should
A voice crack of maturity
There's disease all around
Yes depression and mono and self doubt exist
they're there in a multitude
It's quite obvious too
No need to allude
Enough for everyone to have
a little
or a lot
no matter what you'd prefer
Yet the problem lies with us
we're never quite sure
We're not sure which we'd rather have
We're not sure what is worst
What to do
What to say
when it's time to let go
Or if we should stay
To let on that at night
sometimes you pray
Not sure what to
but sometimes
Sometimes it's just something to say
A cry into oblivion
For anyone to hear
Yet no one will listen
That's my biggest fear
To let someone know
That For her you shed tears
Of both joy and of sorrow
"Man that's pretty gay"
That you're scared what will happen tomorrow next day
Next Month
And Next year
I'm Not sure
I don't know
Take control of your fate
Don't let the gray rule
The smoke machine of our lives
Is fattened and fed
Indecisiveness is the plague hanging over our heads
It's a cloud bringing rain
Soaking the ground
The reason the worms have gathered around
And what will we do when we need to make sense
Of things that are happening now
Present tense
Is it yes is it no?
you can't always stay neutral
"I just don't know"
Please don't give me that
Make a decision for once in your life
For anyone's sake just answer the question I don't want to hear what you think is best for me or for you
For somebody please
Just let me know what it is you believe
you're driving me crazy
my head's in a stew
I just want a simple no or a yes
"It's for my own good" means nothing at all
Because staring at shoelaces gives little away
I'm not sure what it is
why can't you just say
I don't deserve much
but respect would be nice
So just look in my eyes
I only beg that you spare me your lies
Pierce my heart with a spear
Or keep it held close
And always near
Just let me know!
Sure rejection hurts but it's healthy to hear
Just be blunt to my face don't quiver in fear
Isaac Jun 2014
I'm alive but barely breathing,
Troubled lungs with time receding.
Oceans swelling deep within me,
Close my eyelids, open now free.

Forbidden love demands a loser,
Better I go down without her.
This ships sinking, fate demanding.
Losing altitude, plane's crash landing.

Plane kiss ground, knife into skin,
****** water, sharks, I see fin.
Feeding frenzy, ripped into shreds,
Liquid racing, childhood sleds.

Winter wonderland, now stained red,
What the **** is wrong with my head?
Cleanse in shower, I'm still *****,
Put my mask on "Yeah I'm sturdy".

Headphones on, I won't hear a thing,
Never mind dad's started yelling.
Out the door, maybe if I run.
Dusty pavement, sparks from a gun.

How the hell did I end up here?
Outside her house, with no one else near.
Ring the bell? No I'm a coward.
Once again I'm overpowered.

Call a friend and smoke some grass,
I think of how I've been an ***.
If I stepped in her shoes I'd see,
Never mind they're too small for me.

Return home, collapse into bed,
Swirling thoughts inside of my head.
Reality hurts when it bites,
I'll try and sleep it off tonight.
Isaac May 2014
I'm sorry I ever told you I loved you.

Not because it is not the truth.

But because I'm only saying what we both know is true.

The first night I said it was late on the phone.

I was scared for what you would put yourself through.

I said it to you tears audible in my tone.

Three words that mean so much, yet never enough.

I gave myself completely to you

My cards turned outwards for you to call my bluff

You only once returned those words towards me.

But now you deny that,

Water from my eyes for all to see.

I wish you never said those words "I love you"

I could see it in your eyes, each one a galaxy.

Some Words are more overrated than the color blue

I said it once,  from there now i overused

Conversing now lazy because "I love you"

No more amoret or hazel, three words now I abused

Because I said those words this is difficult.

I became who I swore not to be.

In modesty never now alone's the result.
I
Isaac May 2014
Today I was alone
I didn't go to school
I stayed sick at home
Under my own rule

The day went by too slow
But then it went too fast
Doing nothing I now know
Something I want to last

It is now the evening
The sun no longer shine
I'm sitting here and reading
While feasting on skittles and wine
A poem about nothing I'm particular other than doing nothing
Isaac May 2014
The stars in the sky
Bring me oblivion fears
She outshines them all
Isaac May 2014
I cannot be sure the day I died,
I'm pretty sure it rained.
Not only water from tears I cried,
Was darkened sidewalk stained.

I ran alone through midnight static,
In puddles my steps fell.
Hating to be melodramatic,
But it was ******* hell.

Running in fear of being too weak,
To stay away from knife.
For her not I my promise keep,
Because she saved my life.
My last escape is still a reminder
Isaac May 2014
Dream of congregation,
Pray for isolation,
One ironic lonely nation.
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