They told me to shoot for the stars
But the gravity of negativity
Outweighed the thermals of positivity
And even with everyone's support
To Hell I fell

so, i sit and wonder,
and also ponder,
if he actually loves me,
or only what's inside of me,

i go and ask him,
what made you fall in love with me?
i watched his cheerful eyes go dim,
he sighs, and then replies, "well you see,
i fell in love with the heart in you!"

i smile,
even though my soul turns blue,
i'm a bit confused,
doesn't he see the galaxies in me, and the art in my heart?
but oh well, what's new
I hear him softly grumble 'whew'
as if he just got out of a life threatning situation,
i began to get anxious, and focus back on my soothing mediation.

citizens are dying
mommas are crying
countries are sighing
goverments are trying
to do all they can
but they don't realize that they have to unite man to man,
so maybe all of these attacks will stop, including in pakistan,
blood is drying,
bombs are flying,
watching this on the news is horrifying,
deaths are multiplying,
this is terrifying,
my heart goes out to the lives that were lost, to the families that died, to the mothers on their knees crying, to the citizens on hospital beds slowly dying.
you did not deserve this.

sometimes i have to breathe in,
and breathe out,
so i can remind myself not
to doubt
my existence
so i can remind myself of
the distance
between my room and my
mother's
so i can remind myself to not give her another
gray hair
so i can remind myself that
someone out there
probably does care
so that i can remind myself that
i matter,
though my heart
may shatter
and the art
within me probably
won't matter
sometimes i have to breathe in,
and breathe out,
so i can remind myself that i am alive
and that i can survive.

since when did being sad,
become beautiful?*
since when did tears,
become beautiful?
since when did cuts,
become beautiful?
since when did mental illnesses
become beautiful?
Since when did depression
become beautiful?
when did all of this become, beautiful?
no.
i want you to think that when i smile, and when i am happy is beautiful.
i want you to think that when i laugh, it is beautiful.
i want you to think that when my hair dances with the wind that it is beautiful.
I want you to think that when my eyes reflect the moon, that that is beautiful.
Sadness, pain, and everything does not define my beauty.
It should be my happiness that does, *shouldn't it?