And we stood there in silence.
She didn't cry
Nor did her voice shake.
She just looked at me straight in the eye
And said,
"I thought I was at least worth fighting for."
And when she spoke those words
In the calmest way possible
I swear I could almost hear her heart break.

I reach out my hand and grasp at the air.
My eyes well with tears, how can this be fair?
Surrounded by these people, but cursed to feel alone.
Forced to wander my mind, without a place to call home.
The tears, now a steady stream down my cheeks.
I hide my face and I begin to silently weep.
The people who care asking if I am okay.
Then they assume that I am, they resume with their day.
When I try and I try, never leaving them alone.
All I hear when I need help, is the blank dial tone.
I drop to my knees, finally giving up all thought.
I decide this is where I should be, left to rot.
I wish I could show myself, they really want to help.
But i can't seem to let them, I force myself into hell.
I lie here alone, alone with just my mind.
I wait to be consumed by it, it's just a matter of time.
I close my eyes, hearing the pleas of those I let down.
And I lie in my coffin, as I'm lowered six feet into the ground.

You're not really a baby, no more than I am an adult at 20.
I'm struggling to find the words to tell you that I understand.
I have been where you are.
I went through those days and nights when it felt like the world was against me.
Oh the nights were worse than the days, nothing like the ticking of a clock to make you feel alone.
Growing up isn't easy, kids at school are cruel and dumb.
I coped the way you're coping too.
Turned my body into a canvas in which I only painted with red.
Hid behind hoodies and long sleeved shirts.
Told mom and dad white lies about my newly painted "artwork".
So I'm not just some concerned family member condescendingly saying that I understand, I actually do.
I have fought that battle, and some days I still do.
I've been stuck in that darkness, felt the need to open myself up to fight my demons.
But baby brother, opening yourself up, painting those canvases will only win battles, and only for so long.
It takes family to really win that war.

When a woman says she doesn’t deserve to be with her man
He’s got to make her understand
That she is worth more than the world thinks
Men try to keep women down in the so called Man’s World
But a Man has to be the one who does the right thing
Even when it seems like treason
Who will stand up?
He assures his girl that he is just a simple man
And she can do exactly the same, even better
His heart reaches out to her, trying to contain a growing temper with the world creating such a mind set
He knows that he has to hold her hand and fight with her together.

There is nothing sadder in this world
Than to see a mother sobbing into a baby blanket
It doesn't matter how old he was
Or what he had become
It can never change a mother's love
She breaks my heart
Watching her cry
Sobbing, knowing that he is cold

"I'd strike the Heavens if they struck me!"* - Ahab

Dear god, just a few questions
(I know how busy you are):

Where were you when the stray bullet
found the skull of the little girl
in the sandbox at the playground
(another drug deal gone wrong)

-Were you smelling your flowers?-

or when the machetes flashed and
loped off the hands of the tribal others

-Were you admiring one of your sunsets?-

I know you have never ever visited
the Balkans where men were lined up
and forced to watch their mothers,
wives and daughters being gang *****

-Maybe you had a cold then.-

and I never caught a glimpse of you
in Viet Nam where the ****** fell
like your gentle rain on the innocents
and my partner was cut in half
by a burst from a 40 caliber machine gun

-Were you cutting a ribbon at a new cathedral?-

or later when I went mad and ended up
committed, in jail, alone, broken

-Temporary deafness?-

or when my brother was set up and busted
by a corrupt attorney general
and when my mother died a horrible
long slobbering death by Alzheimer's

-More busy days?-

so I guess I only really have one question:

exactly what good are you?

   ~mce

I am just fine.
I am a son hiding my depression.
I'm a boy trying to making a good impression.  
I'm a friend acting like I'm fine.
I'm a teenager that's struggling.
I'm the dude sitting next to you.
I'm the one asking you to care.  
I'm your best friend hoping you'll be there.

He kills her
he's a murderer

She kills him
she's a victim

trying to survive

her word against his
but he's dead

his word against her
still leaves him dead!

domestic violence
is not gender based!

It's gender biased!

We all to quickly judge
with haste

Those that are just trying
*to survive

I'm a complainer who shows the world a mask, carved from the most skilled of hands.
I'm not truly me.
I'm a cover up.
A fake.
But that's ok, because I don't  even know me.