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"gingham" poems
A sigh signals some sort of disclosure. – glancing over his eyeglass frames at the slow downward tilt of her chest her gingham blouse rises again as she inhales energy for her words, words intended to clarify or confuse, he does not know. His own exhale and a frowning brow signal that he is listening- to judge whether her statement is real or fancy. Her words a mercury for her mood no gauge left as he guesses seeking to understand her, to crawl through her veins like a virus, to know her every desire, every expectation, even every fear. He is adrift in his own flaws, unable to grasp precisely her feelings, her expressions. His distrust is great whether of himself or of her. Salt honesty with caprice and tasty fare is spoiled. Gripping the arm of his chair, muscles straining to lurch forward, he escapes toward the door leaving her words to fill the hollow behind him. Tomorrow he may choose valor, today the fear of authenticity scares him to his den.
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Jun 22, 2014
Jun 22, 2014 at 4:49 PM UTC
Fear of Authenticity*
Needle, needle, dip and dart, Thrusting up and down, Where's the man could ease a heart Like a satin gown? See the stitches curve and crawl Round the cunning seams-- Patterns thin and sweet and small As a lady's dreams. Wantons go in bright brocade; Brides in organdie; Gingham's for the plighted maid; Satin's for the free! Wool's to line a miser's chest; Crepe's to calm the old; Velvet hides an empty breast Satin's for the bold! Lawn is for a bishop's yoke; Linen's for a nun; Satin is for wiser folk-- Would the dress were done! Satin glows in candlelight-- Satin's for the proud! They will say who watch at night, "What a fine shroud!"
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4k
The Satin Dress
She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. When I first saw her smiling face It was a good old summers day She had moved down from the city And I hoped that she would stay We played games out in the haystacks We ran races through the corn Turn left and hit the river Turn right, you're lost till morn She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. She occupied my dreams then And still does to this day Back then I hardly new her I just hoped that she would stay Short shorts and Gingham dresses made her look the country part But high heels and silk organza Tugged the city in her heart She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. We'd go to high school hoedowns And dance like no one else was there But when she heard Big Band Music She was dreaming of Times Square She loved to go out touring In my pickup through the crops But in my heart I knew she missed The sounds of taxi cabs and cops She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. She stayed here all through high school But I knew deep down it had to end I knew if I tried to say "I Love You" she'd say "I love you like a friend" She knew I'd never leave here And I knew she had it made If she went back to the city And stopped her country masquerade She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. It was two weeks past commencement When I told her what I thought Then I dropped down to me knee right there And I showed her what I'd bought I looked into her smiling eyes And prayed that she'd say yes Would she choose to stay in Daisy Dukes Or go back to her chiffon dress I'll let you guess the answer By the way I end this poem But I'm still here in the country And she's waiting now at home. She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt.
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May 26, 2012
May 26, 2012 at 7:08 PM UTC
Pretty City Country Girl
She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. When I first saw her smiling face It was a good old summers day She had moved down from the city And I hoped that she would stay We played games out in the haystacks We ran races through the corn Turn left and hit the river Turn right, you're lost till morn She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. She occupied my dreams then And still does to this day Back then I hardly new her I just hoped that she would stay Short shorts and Gingham dresses made her look the country part But high heels and silk organza Tugged the city in her heart She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. We'd go to high school hoedowns And dance like no one else was there But when she heard Big Band Music She was dreaming of Times Square She loved to go out touring In my pickup through the crops But in my heart I knew she missed The sounds of taxi cabs and cops She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. She stayed here all through high school But I knew deep down it had to end I knew if I tried to say "I Love You" she'd say "I love you like a friend" She knew I'd never leave here And I knew she had it made If she went back to the city And stopped her country masquerade She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt. It was two weeks past commencement When I told her what I thought Then I dropped down to me knee right there And I showed her what I'd bought I looked into her smiling eyes And prayed that she'd say yes Would she choose to stay in Daisy Dukes Or go back to her chiffon dress I'll let you guess the answer By the way I end this poem But I'm still here in the country And she's waiting now at home. She's my pretty city country girl She's something I can't lose Is she livin' in  the country or the city, she must choose You know I really love her She's the one I really want But if she moves off to the city It's my heart she'll stay and haunt.
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In class the big black and white tick-tock pinched my mid-morning belly. When everyone else borrowed numbers, my pencil lead and yellow paint scratched out hunger. Minutes chugged like school buses.  Even columns of three-numeraled numbers minused the bottom line, scold of lunch. A borrowed quarter and dime from the office, meant a secretary’s red-lipsticked mouth, bent and accusing.  Her coiffed curls shook my dreams. I would starve before sailing into that office for my little belly, but forever yearned for the secretary to pet my hair. Say, “There, there,”like to a character in a book rosy with girls in gingham dresses. But, for all those lovely boats of hot lunches: meatloaf with crusts of catsup like a winter cap, buttered beans, dinner rolls and cold-cartoned milk, not watered down-- Missing lunch,  I'd hide out in the cold storage room of sack lunches next to the playground. While the others ate, I'd escape at the right tick into the recess of blacktop and tetherball.
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Feb 3, 2015
Feb 3, 2015 at 2:28 PM UTC
School Lunch
the roads are wet i don’t know when it rained maybe i’m not a writer anymore maybe i stopped paying attention maybe i left behind all wonder in my adolescence maybe i forgot how to find meaning in ordinary things flowery air and lemonade gingham dresses and handwritten letters covered in glitter and cursive maybe i need to read more books and take more walks and spin more beach house records then, maybe then i’ll find stars in blue irises and messy hair again
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Jun 3, 2018
Jun 3, 2018 at 11:30 AM UTC
anhedonia
In the morning the mist arises but some will say it is yesterday's hubris. I dont have an attic to wayleigh communications or require windows to twitch gingham curtains so the deep chill void remains. A debutante passed by my uncut grass but she was no better served, a dream interview with ******* Club turned sour, this time of year. At least she hasn't endless dealership openings or humoured the word "exhilarating" in interviews when inventing a rich Stepfather. Like me there be few visitors. Thirty  stubborn years will pass but at least she know the meaning. The pride of the morning.
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Apr 24, 2012
Apr 24, 2012 at 4:11 PM UTC
Pride of the Morning
For me, you are Sunday. Today is Sunday, and tomorrow will be Sunday. Because I am stuck in gingham yellow sheets, small white saucers with matching ceramic cups, cigarette ashes like a crop circle around them as I sip homemade coffee. The ***** brown liquid sloshing in the back of my throat, scorching my insides as I swallow something not nearly as painful as looking up for an answer to the crossword and realizing you are not in fact actually there, and your hand is not on my thigh, tracing the outline of my knee with your thumb. I am stuck like a kid on the monkey bars. Deciphering between reaching my hand out to grab the next rung or just allowing myself to fall into the wood chips, welcome that scraped skin and soil in the worry lines of my palms. Because calling you, reaching out to that line, could end with me face up on my bed staring at the blades of my fan trying to pinpoint just one to follow around and around again. Or I could get your voicemail. Or you could see my number and decide to hang up. How close were we really anyway? Or you could answer and we could talk through how bad the weather is, how we've been doing, and then get to the poignant silence, that hum in the background that coils through the wires into my ear, down the canal, and sinks into my heart until the pressure becomes too much. Until I tell you that its Sunday. That I need the 1994 Tony Award winning musical for 3 across, and hopefully, you'll give me the right answer.
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Jan 27, 2016
Jan 27, 2016 at 11:55 AM UTC
Sunday Morning
The hobby horse it bolted, To him I'm still attached, Bumping along the gravel track, My arms are torn to ribbons, My head is sorely hurt, Hobby horse was just a game, Grey corduroy head bowed low, A matter of respect , I'm told, It's neckerchief of gingham was checked in red and white, Caught him on a bramble bush as I went flying by, It poked him smartly in the eye, Never saw what was going on, His brain was made of fluff, His heart was made of solid wood, He wasn't always very good, He was a dashing fellow, His slender body pole, Painted florescent yellow, So all could see him coming, He was just my favourite hobby horse, Of course! By ladylivvi1 I don't know if Americans have hobby horses. A horse made out of broom stick with a fabric head and children pretended to ride them! © 2013 ladylivvi1 (All rights reserved)
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Aug 21, 2013
Aug 21, 2013 at 5:03 PM UTC
Hobby Horse!
I held up that grand quilt in my tiny hands, thoughts rushing past my mind. That denim piece splattered with red paint, ah, remember when you wore that for the first time as you picked carrots with Dad? That cotton piece filled with a vibrant orange, how could you forget? That was the dress you wore to your first ever play recital. That baby pink rayon piece, you wore that on the first day of high school, you could not forget. That grey wool piece, that was your Christmas present, and you wore it near the fire. You spilled hot coco on it. That rare purple leather, that is too important to forget. Remember, it was the jacket you wore on you first date. That blue flannel piece, you loved that one. You wore it all the time, ever since the first time you wore it when you won “best speaker” at a school competition. That brown cupro piece, you wore that to your mother's birthday, the one where she got promoted to L.A. That green polyester piece, never can forget, could you? That was the shirt you wore when Dad and Mom divorced.   That white lyocell piece, you wore it at your graduation party, and your whole family was there. That barkcloth piece, it was a day to remember, you united with you brother once again in that dress. That calico piece, you wore that to the hospital when Granddad got a heart attack. That black and white damask piece, that was so beautiful, so you kept it for your dinner. Which you hadn't realized was your engagement dinner with your boyfriend. That red gingham piece, wow, that was the time you met your dad's girlfriend. And Mom had not moved on. That black lace piece, a day never to forget. It was the funeral of your Granddad’s, and that was the dress you wore. That grey gauze piece, it was the shawl you wore when you visited your grandma, and found out she was ill of depression. That amazing white gazar piece, a memorable day. It was the dress you wore to you wedding. That turquoise silk piece, *too soon after your wedding. It was the part of the purse you took to your Grandma's funeral. * That white and blue jacquard fabric, that was the fabric you had for your curtains, when you moved into your own house. That leopard print intarsia piece, it was an amazing day. Your mother visited you the first time in your new home. The both of you cried with the rain pouring outside. Nothing could have ruined that beautiful moment together, united. That satin cobalt blue piece, that dress you wore to the dinner with your parents and husband. Only to later realize that you brother had met with an accident. That exotic lantana piece, you remember, don't you? You wore that dress when you met your brother days later, severely hurt. That red lace piece, you went to London with your husband wearing that. You were so excited. That madras piece, it came from that cushion out of the four your husband bought you. That cream organdy piece, your mother had found it in her closet, a dress from her mother's, and wanted to give it to you. That deep purple paisley piece, you wore that on the day your mother died. And like that, all the thoughts came back to me. All the pieces of my past, fit in together. But it never made sense – that was how my life worked. And there were more pieces, more parts, to fit together, until my life was spread out in front of me. Like a patched quilt.
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Dec 18, 2014
Dec 18, 2014 at 3:32 AM UTC
Patched Quilt
I held up that grand quilt in my tiny hands, thoughts rushing past my mind. That denim piece splattered with red paint, ah, remember when you wore that for the first time as you picked carrots with Dad? That cotton piece filled with a vibrant orange, how could you forget? That was the dress you wore to your first ever play recital. That baby pink rayon piece, you wore that on the first day of high school, you could not forget. That grey wool piece, that was your Christmas present, and you wore it near the fire. You spilled hot coco on it. That rare purple leather, that is too important to forget. Remember, it was the jacket you wore on you first date. That blue flannel piece, you loved that one. You wore it all the time, ever since the first time you wore it when you won “best speaker” at a school competition. That brown cupro piece, you wore that to your mother's birthday, the one where she got promoted to L.A. That green polyester piece, never can forget, could you? That was the shirt you wore when Dad and Mom divorced.   That white lyocell piece, you wore it at your graduation party, and your whole family was there. That barkcloth piece, it was a day to remember, you united with you brother once again in that dress. That calico piece, you wore that to the hospital when Granddad got a heart attack. That black and white damask piece, that was so beautiful, so you kept it for your dinner. Which you hadn't realized was your engagement dinner with your boyfriend. That red gingham piece, wow, that was the time you met your dad's girlfriend. And Mom had not moved on. That black lace piece, a day never to forget. It was the funeral of your Granddad’s, and that was the dress you wore. That grey gauze piece, it was the shawl you wore when you visited your grandma, and found out she was ill of depression. That amazing white gazar piece, a memorable day. It was the dress you wore to you wedding. That turquoise silk piece, *too soon after your wedding. It was the part of the purse you took to your Grandma's funeral. * That white and blue jacquard fabric, that was the fabric you had for your curtains, when you moved into your own house. That leopard print intarsia piece, it was an amazing day. Your mother visited you the first time in your new home. The both of you cried with the rain pouring outside. Nothing could have ruined that beautiful moment together, united. That satin cobalt blue piece, that dress you wore to the dinner with your parents and husband. Only to later realize that you brother had met with an accident. That exotic lantana piece, you remember, don't you? You wore that dress when you met your brother days later, severely hurt. That red lace piece, you went to London with your husband wearing that. You were so excited. That madras piece, it came from that cushion out of the four your husband bought you. That cream organdy piece, your mother had found it in her closet, a dress from her mother's, and wanted to give it to you. That deep purple paisley piece, you wore that on the day your mother died. And like that, all the thoughts came back to me. All the pieces of my past, fit in together. But it never made sense – that was how my life worked. And there were more pieces, more parts, to fit together, until my life was spread out in front of me. Like a patched quilt.
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52
You almost kissed me, and you shouldn't have. On the gingham tablecloth in the yellow light, you lifted me from the counter top onto my feet putting your hat on my head and tickling my ribs. You know it's my sweet spot, leads straight to my heart if you're gentle enough. I told you to stop and you walked away, eyes lingering on my bare skin between where my top ended on my waist and where my dark denim jeans began to hug my hips. I flipped my hair back around, joining in some conversation too late between a girl drunk on grape juice and a wedding crasher straggler in a forest green flannel with camel cigarettes in the pocket. That's when you came back over and started yelling some story that happened to you the night before. You told it well, the circle captivated, me mesmerized by how blue your eyes stayed all this time without me noticing. You had the whole room laughing with your wit and stupid vernacular, but I was smiling because you looked so beautiful in those drunken honest moments where I recognized the person beneath the banter where I saw you. I was saying my goodbyes to the carhartt boys and their one night girls when you grabbed me by the hand and spun me around like we were dancing, pulled me in by your hand pressed on my shoulder blades the other around my waist I gasped as your lips almost touched mine, but then you looked down at me with those same blue eyes and took a deep breath, slowly letting your hands glide down my back then to your sides. I just stared back at you, wishing you'd forget the logic and put your hands back where they were, tracing your lips with that almost kiss, and I could feel how much you wanted to be in this moment desperately searching for a way to my lips but something stopped us. And I think it was because we knew it would only lead to something messier than where we were at it would be a backwards romance, reversing our ***** footsteps in something we've tried and tried to understand that it never works out the way either of us plans. We were both doing so well, moving on but in that moment we almost gave all that strength up gave into something too tempting and too wrong. Because we can't really stay away from each other all that long. I mean, you almost kissed me and you shouldn't have, but I swear I wish you would have.
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Jan 31, 2013
Jan 31, 2013 at 1:14 PM UTC
You Almost Kissed Me
You almost kissed me, and you shouldn't have. On the gingham tablecloth in the yellow light, you lifted me from the counter top onto my feet putting your hat on my head and tickling my ribs. You know it's my sweet spot, leads straight to my heart if you're gentle enough. I told you to stop and you walked away, eyes lingering on my bare skin between where my top ended on my waist and where my dark denim jeans began to hug my hips. I flipped my hair back around, joining in some conversation too late between a girl drunk on grape juice and a wedding crasher straggler in a forest green flannel with camel cigarettes in the pocket. That's when you came back over and started yelling some story that happened to you the night before. You told it well, the circle captivated, me mesmerized by how blue your eyes stayed all this time without me noticing. You had the whole room laughing with your wit and stupid vernacular, but I was smiling because you looked so beautiful in those drunken honest moments where I recognized the person beneath the banter where I saw you. I was saying my goodbyes to the carhartt boys and their one night girls when you grabbed me by the hand and spun me around like we were dancing, pulled me in by your hand pressed on my shoulder blades the other around my waist I gasped as your lips almost touched mine, but then you looked down at me with those same blue eyes and took a deep breath, slowly letting your hands glide down my back then to your sides. I just stared back at you, wishing you'd forget the logic and put your hands back where they were, tracing your lips with that almost kiss, and I could feel how much you wanted to be in this moment desperately searching for a way to my lips but something stopped us. And I think it was because we knew it would only lead to something messier than where we were at it would be a backwards romance, reversing our ***** footsteps in something we've tried and tried to understand that it never works out the way either of us plans. We were both doing so well, moving on but in that moment we almost gave all that strength up gave into something too tempting and too wrong. Because we can't really stay away from each other all that long. I mean, you almost kissed me and you shouldn't have, but I swear I wish you would have.
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53
ELSIE FLIMMERWON, you got a job now with a jazz outfit in vaudeville. The houses go wild when you finish the act shimmying a fast shimmy to The Livery Stable Blues. It is long ago, Elsie Flimmerwon, I saw your mother over a washtub in a grape arbor when your father came with the locomotor ataxia shuffle. It is long ago, Elsie, and now they spell your name with an electric sign. Then you were a little thing in checked gingham and your mother wiped your nose and said: You little fool, keep off the streets. Now you are a big girl at last and streetfuls of people read your name and a line of people shaped like a letter S stand at the box office hoping to see you shimmy.
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1.6k
Vaudeville Dancer
lets dance our way to victory street if i find a feather on the pavement i'll tuck it behind the ear of an unaware passer by a toothy girl with gingham ribbons a stooping man remembering his wife thats the kind of thing you'd like if i find a flower on the common i'll save it for you the yellow ones were always your favourite with pollen as sweet as the smell of  the warmest soup or chips on a monday eve or the smell of your scarves I'll find it in the field, with the stream remember the time we saw a kingfisher singing a song of his own neither of us knew the melody, the score, yet we smiled in silence at his moment lets dance our way to victory street i'll save the yellow flower and king feather for you keep them in my pocket for a moment which suits maybe one day when it's all a little easier i'll let the flower and the feather float away downstream i'll ease my fingertips open release the grasp of them, of us, intertwined I'll stand and watch smiling in silence as they dance the way to the street of victory for the final chapter of this story
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Nov 4, 2010
Nov 4, 2010 at 5:50 PM UTC
Victory Street
You might have seen them through the window, a little girl pouting on the stool and her mother behind her, deft fingers weaving the strands together, chocolate hair in french braids and the wrinkles in her blue gingham dress. There is a beginning to everything. Golden-hair boy, caramel colors glinting in the sun, pieces that flopped over his eyes and plastered themselves over his forehead when the wind blew erratic. He wears t-shirts streaked with dirt and high- water jeans half-rolled, half-bunched up to his knees. She thought, I could love this boy. They're in the field again, ankles itching under her frilly socks and ants crawling over her shoes. He lets one amble around on his finger while she studies him. Holding it up to the light, all serious and squinting, He whispers, "They are so small." She remembers this field for a long time. She points to his heart. This is where I live. He looks at her skeptically, raises an eyebrow."Is it awfully uncomfortable there?" She lets the silence grow while the birds make conversation and smiles to herself when she sees him listening too. Sometimes it is cold, but then you remember me. There are pieces of love scattered around this world. I have been trying to find them, trying to arrange them into a comprehensible hope. There's the field. There's the beach. There's the little stream that carries us where we need to go. There's you, in that one summer. It's been so long, but I remember. I remember it perfectly. She's making a daisy chain while he looks out over the lake. *Climb the tree for me. I want to see how high you can go.* Nearly breaking the branches with his weight, he calls out, in the purest joy you've ever heard to this day. "You should see this view!" I do.
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Apr 30, 2017
Apr 30, 2017 at 1:22 PM UTC
daisy
You might have seen them through the window, a little girl pouting on the stool and her mother behind her, deft fingers weaving the strands together, chocolate hair in french braids and the wrinkles in her blue gingham dress. There is a beginning to everything. Golden-hair boy, caramel colors glinting in the sun, pieces that flopped over his eyes and plastered themselves over his forehead when the wind blew erratic. He wears t-shirts streaked with dirt and high- water jeans half-rolled, half-bunched up to his knees. She thought, I could love this boy. They're in the field again, ankles itching under her frilly socks and ants crawling over her shoes. He lets one amble around on his finger while she studies him. Holding it up to the light, all serious and squinting, He whispers, "They are so small." She remembers this field for a long time. She points to his heart. This is where I live. He looks at her skeptically, raises an eyebrow."Is it awfully uncomfortable there?" She lets the silence grow while the birds make conversation and smiles to herself when she sees him listening too. Sometimes it is cold, but then you remember me. There are pieces of love scattered around this world. I have been trying to find them, trying to arrange them into a comprehensible hope. There's the field. There's the beach. There's the little stream that carries us where we need to go. There's you, in that one summer. It's been so long, but I remember. I remember it perfectly. She's making a daisy chain while he looks out over the lake. *Climb the tree for me. I want to see how high you can go.* Nearly breaking the branches with his weight, he calls out, in the purest joy you've ever heard to this day. "You should see this view!" I do.
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36
welcome she welcomes my energy inside and gives me tea calms my busy light without a single word smiles at my bright aura a tabby ginger cat purrs on a gingham cloth blue Delft plates in a row this was a time with no fuzzy no noise no waste no haste dimming of all goodness a woman’s head rolls on the fine sifting sand dry and warm a rapier juts forward, pierces the guts of an old man who carries a child on his back there’s a red blanket what flies on the line soggy and now,  it’s hard to tell whose blood drips so an elongated horn is blown from a desert hill nobody lives in the mountains of Miranda anymore her ghost has found voice in the echo of the brambles her secrets still buzz in heavy hives of long ago discovered and ravaged by trusted traitors now hanging in clusters, newly unfound dried corpses also hang (unmolested) in bloodwood trees where every trace of gall is let flow in kino the blood of Miranda flows on she of terminalis lives on eternal in brook and vale and bush in veins of progeny bee and also in the crickets of the field
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Dec 5, 2013
Dec 5, 2013 at 11:50 AM UTC
Blood of Miranda
all I've ever known are ****** ex-prostitutes, madwomen. I see men with quiet, gentle women ­ I see them in the supermarkets, I see them walking down the streets together, I see them in their apartments: people at peace, living together. I know that their peace is only partial, but there is peace, often hours and days of peace. all I've ever known are pill freaks, alcoholics, ****** ex-prostitutes, madwomen. when one leaves another arrives worse than her predecessor. I see so many men with quiet clean girls in gingham dresses girls with faces that are not wolverine or predatory. "don't ever bring a ***** around," I tell my few friends, "I'll fall in love with her." "you couldn't stand a good woman, Bukowski." I need a good woman. I need a good woman more than I need this typewriter, more than I need my automobile, more than I need Mozart; I need a good woman so badly that I can taste her in the air, I can feel her at my fingertips, I can see sidewalks built for her feet to walk upon, I can see pillows for her head, I can feel my waiting laughter, I can see her petting a cat, I can see her sleeping, I can see her slippers on the floor. I know that she exists but where is she upon this earth as the ****** keep finding me? Charles Bukowski
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Aug 13, 2015
Aug 13, 2015 at 12:15 PM UTC
Quiet clean girls in gingham dresses
Mother, you grew up on honey and white bread, cream between your teeth ******* dry against the roof of your mouth And Mother, your dolls were always children -- you swore you'd treat them better, dressed them up in pink gingham cloth, ran with them through the jungles in your backyard, and that backyard swallowed you in secrets, you never questioned what lay beneath the floorboards where your father slept in the basement, you tangled yourself in the reeds Some days, you wondered why the walls of your house shook (they never knew you listened) and some days, the dust tracked itself along your skin like evidence, giving your hiding place away You sheltered yourself in paintings and broom closets, caressed your clouded heart against a generation built on dreams and divorce, the echoes of war aching in your father's palms -- Neil Armstrong landed on the moon the day after your birthday and you took it as a sign that you would never hold the stars in your hands Instead, you cradled a child against your chest, hoping it would be enough to save her from the sunlight in your eyes
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Apr 16, 2012
Apr 16, 2012 at 2:32 PM UTC
for my mother, for the graying dreams she holds
THE MELAMINE TABLE TOP WITH THE PINK GINGHAM TABLE CLOTH You're kidding? The goat is on the table. The goat comes in ( doesn't even bother to knock )& stands on the table for a good half hour as if it were  an art installation or some obscure goat ritual that humans are unaware of as if it were a phrase in a foreign dictionary the equivalent of the cat sat on the mat. And when the goat is done it just jumps down and leaves just as it came as if it were the most ordinary of ordinary things to do. Even now, I still see the ghost of that goat even though it was long ago made into stew as if the goat realised that a time would come & come it would when it would end up on the table but not of its own volition. But right now it is standing its ground on the Melamine table top with the pink gingham table cloth and becoming that something that just can not be forgot.
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Jan 9, 2016
Jan 9, 2016 at 9:45 AM UTC
THE MELAMINE TABLE TOP WITH THE PINK GINGHAM TABLE CLOTH
In the dark velvet lining of a humid gilded box is a little china doll: a delicate charm for her grandmother's gold bracelet. She lies languid. Her sinews are chains and her bones glass. Light swarms through her: a mess of wispy snakes. At noon it bounces wildly like the pinball game she's heard so enthusiastically described in a wildly raucous rock and roll song. Tentatively she reaches for the stars painted through her hair raised a bit like brail and hot to the touch. They're made of fire billions of miles away. They have halos radiant at midnight. At midnight the humid gilded box is damp and muggy and she twists and wakes sullen with panic and covered in stardust. The grime of the moon coats her gingham dress, collected as she skidded to home plate. Precious Darling, Bless her heart, for unbeknownst to her the humid gilded box is within a teapot, upon a shelf, within a cupboard, beside a grandfather clock that chimes at each curly hour and rattles the gilding so that as the hours pass - as the days disappear: her darling little precious box dims like the tapestry her grandmother hung to mourn the grandfather clock.
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Apr 8, 2012
Apr 8, 2012 at 2:47 PM UTC
The Grandbaby Doll
On a bench in a park I sat alone to watch the sun go down and as I watched the girl with the braided hair sat next to me I taught her about life she lived where shadows roamed free in a house on a field with harboured secrets silently, assuredly, she mouths out to me touching my hand living the life I left behind the girl with the braided hair talked with me I distract her from life she pranced around in white mary-janes in a blue gingham dress with too-mature worry sweetly, cautiously she laughs with me brushing my hair living a life she wished to live the girl with the braided hair watched the sunset with me creating her own life where no shadows dared to roam in a castle by the sea with fairies, and light sadly, wishfully, she rests her head on me dreaming her life away and I realise the girl with the braided hair is me
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May 1, 2013
May 1, 2013 at 4:18 PM UTC
the girl with the braided hair
Lost between here and there A roadless road Some cactus whiplash sun juice dry hope heaved onto an omlette of cow brains and mothers stale toast warnings. A gingham curtain on a beat up pickup truck / home shakes its dust in the desert wind where nothing runs only lives
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Sep 27, 2010
Sep 27, 2010 at 2:36 PM UTC
the *** of empty
Looking down I pull out the chair, the two empty cups still where they were left, spoons on saucers, granules of sugar spilt all over the gingham cloth, with a few drops of coffee; I watch them leaving arm in arm, smiling, so in love; The mess aside I picked a good table, shaded from the sun, Café con leche por favor I ask, as the waiter clears away the lovers conversation.
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May 10, 2016
May 10, 2016 at 8:26 AM UTC
Table Talk
. Laughing endeavors with marigold dreams Soft interventions in line with the seams Post card adventures with reasons to share All this I love every time we are there Paintings of pansies and red apple trees Kites filled with colors a’ sail on the breeze Sunsets at twilight that cause us to stare All this I love every time we are there Sidewalks with tables of gingham design Minutes and hours along just in time Butterfly moonbeams so swift on the air All this I love every time we are there White picket fences along every street Butter cream candies so tasty and sweet Secret emotions that show that we care All this I love every time we are there Books filled with pages the two of us read Empty filled spaces with just what we need Vegetable gardens at harvest so fair All this I love every time we are there Days of the week as we call them by name Dancing together so slow in the rain Sunlight reflections a’ touch of your hair All this I love every time we are there Leaves that are changing in colors so bright Holding you close on a cool autumn night Feeling your love that can hardly compare All this I love every time we are there So many reasons I find in your love Sent by the light of the moon up above Tickles my heart as my world is aware Each time I’m with you, alone, anywhere
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Mar 20, 2015
Mar 20, 2015 at 7:43 AM UTC
With you, alone, anywhere
we don’t need to be fixed. we need to be aware. open. owning it. embracing our pain, our history our patterns, our spasms. confession: I've been fantasizing… that one day you'd roll up, like Richard Pryor at the end of Moving, sitting atop a semi-truck of your whatnots, war paint smeared upon your dashing, wearing a tie bandana and bullet sash, carrying a semi-automatic weapon, after stalking your **** cross-country, to the front of our gutted dream house, after this misadventure, arriving, finally, at home imperfect, thankful just to be, there with delirious, Cheshire cat grin, like a lion dragging in a carcass, bloodied, brave and proud, eager to greet my eyes and say: *Honey! Look what I found! I found my **** I brought my **** home... This is my **** and I would greet you, with water-colored greys inking down my dimpled peach, in a black and white gingham apron, heels, nylons and corseted vintage dress, mirroring that ********* right back, tray of warm hash brownies in hand, that got nothing on my toasty sweet lips dripping to say: *Your **** is lovely, darling. It'll go perfect with mine! It's up in the attic - properly labeled, arranged and categorized.* and with that kind of ownership, acceptance and bravery, there is no way our stuff will ever be more powerful than us, together, merged and emerging, by way of wings, soaring, above our shit-spattered clouds.
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Jun 26, 2017
Jun 26, 2017 at 2:07 PM UTC
own it (it's so ******* ****
Barefoot she walks along the beach Retracing lost memories in ripples of sand The murmur of the surf plays in her ears like muffled notes bowed on a cello, as the sun drips down behind the cobalt waves casting shadows to equal those of her longest night Hushed colours paint her skin in hues of poignancy, her heart beating in rhythm with the tide as she glides through the surf Footprints erased as if she herself had ceased to exist A hallucination in the twilight She pauses Salty spray kisses her cheeks like unshed tears from fatigued days and solitary nights Gazing out upon this vast entity Sublime in its majesty She recognises The meaning of it all Life, love, death Images of antiquity play a delicate overture weaving dreams A skittish child, pigtails and freckles, wearing a yellow gingham dress - collecting precious shells that will gather dust in a long forgotten attic A timid teenager throwing pebbles into oblivion with the boy who will steal her heart, her kisses, her youth A young family drawing their lives in the sand, building castles for the sole pleasure of knocking them down A graceful woman cloaked in bereavement concealing a smile for the reflection of youth glimpsed in the wrinkled mirror of time She lays herself down on a bed limestone Silver hair fanning out amongst the seaweed And gives her last memory Back to the sea (C) Pixievic
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Mar 31, 2016
Mar 31, 2016 at 7:31 AM UTC
Sea Dreams
Dorothy Gale, all freckled and pale Was asleep in her gingham print nighty When a ****** great twister enveloped the vista And blew like the good lord almighty It ripped up the grass and it took out the glass As it lifted the house from position And a blow to the head from the post of her bed Put young Dorothy out of commission She awoke with a fright as she fell from a height Landing squarely on somebody's gran She emerged from indoors to a round of applause And her journey had surely began The people of Aus (because that's where she was) Gave her hazy but helpful directions She should hastily wander the road over yonder To reach Tony before the elections So she took to the road from her former abode In her quest to get back to her folk She aquired some mates, all in similar straits Or the **** of a practical joke A man made of straw was quite hard to ignore With a lion quite lacking in guts And a fella whose skin was constructed from tin Held together with rivets and nuts Such adventures they had, though I think you'll be glad That I've cut to the crux of the rhyme Where a meeting was set, their request would be met To meet Tony in ten minutes time They arrived and were greeted, quite comfortably seated It was then Mr Abbott appeared He regretted to say, to their growing dismay That their wishes had not all been cleared "As I haven't a heart" he was heard to impart "then the tin man is leaving with jack" "And I'm gutless as well" he was careful to tell "So the lion can hurry on back" "And I've also no brain, so it's no once again" "But young lady, your problems are sorted" "You'll be locked up off shore for a month, maybe four "And by christmas, we'll have you deported" By Ben the Poet
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Feb 26, 2015
Feb 26, 2015 at 8:05 PM UTC
The Lizard of Aus
Dorothy Gale, all freckled and pale Was asleep in her gingham print nighty When a ****** great twister enveloped the vista And blew like the good lord almighty It ripped up the grass and it took out the glass As it lifted the house from position And a blow to the head from the post of her bed Put young Dorothy out of commission She awoke with a fright as she fell from a height Landing squarely on somebody's gran She emerged from indoors to a round of applause And her journey had surely began The people of Aus (because that's where she was) Gave her hazy but helpful directions She should hastily wander the road over yonder To reach Tony before the elections So she took to the road from her former abode In her quest to get back to her folk She aquired some mates, all in similar straits Or the **** of a practical joke A man made of straw was quite hard to ignore With a lion quite lacking in guts And a fella whose skin was constructed from tin Held together with rivets and nuts Such adventures they had, though I think you'll be glad That I've cut to the crux of the rhyme Where a meeting was set, their request would be met To meet Tony in ten minutes time They arrived and were greeted, quite comfortably seated It was then Mr Abbott appeared He regretted to say, to their growing dismay That their wishes had not all been cleared "As I haven't a heart" he was heard to impart "then the tin man is leaving with jack" "And I'm gutless as well" he was careful to tell "So the lion can hurry on back" "And I've also no brain, so it's no once again" "But young lady, your problems are sorted" "You'll be locked up off shore for a month, maybe four "And by christmas, we'll have you deported" By Ben the Poet
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