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scooby Nov 2017
Put a Poem Here *******!
Put a poem here *******!
Even if you don't know what that **** is
(it's a collection of words, organized
and broken into
lines

and stanzas
like this!)
Put a poem here *******!
Even if you don't know how to type!
(you take your finger,
assuming you have one
and if not
that's ok
use whatever you prefer,
and press down on one
of those little squares
you know,
the ones with the
letters on em)

Put a poem here *******!
Even if you don't know any white man poets,
dead or alive!
(You don't need em,
you could read em
on the account of background
and cultural appreciation,
but you,
you're enough)

Put a poem here *******!
Even if you don't think you're good enough!
(You are, ******,
and I am the president of poetry saying
it is true,
but ultimately you will,
grow to be your own champion,
maybe not now,
but I can tell you how)

Put a poem here *******!
Even if you don't know how to be your own champion!
(You'll become one by
putting a poem here *******!)

So, put a poem here *******!
Go! Go! Go!
sorry 4 the swears, if you are under twelve don't show this to your mom!
#poetry #writing #art #creating #elitism #academia #how #to #swearing
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Naunie Baltzell Dec 2015
I'm Going to Hell for This
Just because I'm an atheist,
doesn't mean I lack morality.
In fact, my morality
is what I pride myself on.
I have this strong urgency
to love everyone
because I refuse to listen to
the God of discrimination.
I certainly don't need a book
that condones ****, slavery,
misogyny, and genocide
to teach me right from wrong.

Just because I'm an atheist,
doesn't mean my life has no meaning
It just means I have
the freedom to choose my own.
I have value
because I know how
to be a giving person
without having to be tempted
with eternal bliss.
If you're only being helpful
to others due to a promised reward,
does it not cease to
be a good deed?

Just because I'm an atheist,
doesn't mean I have no one
to look up to.
God doesn't create us,
women do.
And why the hell
can't I praise a goddess?
We are creating misogyny
young, claiming that
little girls are always to
put a him first,
instead of themselves.

Just because I'm an atheist,
doesn't mean I hate God.
It's impossible that which
you do not believe exists.
And I desperately don't want
him to exist, because if he does,
then that means he doesn't care,
that he's okay with
watching me suffer.
I don't need any more
people letting me down.

Just because I'm an atheist,
doesn't mean I worship the devil.
It's impossible to worship
that which you do not
believe exists.
But if he did exist,
then I would embrace him
at hells entrance -
tell him I too know what it's like
to be turned into something evil.
Thank him for taking all
the rejected souls that God
turned away without a second glance
Remind him that losing
something good can win you
something great.

Just because I'm an atheist,
doesn't mean I think
Billy Graham is a *******.
No, I actually do
think Billy Graham is a *******.
Anyone who has the audacity
to claim God wanted
marriage to be between
a man and a woman,
when marriage was constructed
long before Christianity was,
doesn't deserve to be
preaching to our children.
This is indoctrination
of the worst kind.

Just because I'm an atheist,
doesn't mean I hate religious people,
only what they preach.
I'm tired of people blanketing
their bigotry with
"religious freedom"
and getting away with it.
If you build a fire
to warm yourself,
and end up burning down
someone's home,
your warmth doesn't bring
their house back.
And it doesn't let you off
the hook for accountability....
Unless you're a Christian
because America was founded
on Christian morals, right?
***** John Adams who says
"The Government of the
United States of America
is not in any sense founded on
the Christian religion."
Or Thomas Jefferson
who encourages you to
"Question with boldness
even the existence of a god."
Or James Madison who once said
"Christianity's fruits are
superstition, bigotry,
and persecution."
But what do the
founding fathers know anyway?
This nation was created only
for those deemed worthy,
those who never realize
they have the right to
think for themselves.

Just because I'm an atheist,
doesn't mean I have all the answers.
But neither do you.
#atheism #secularviews
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JM Oct 2013
Have fun, *******
Crawl to me, darling.
Elbows and knees, hardwood floors.
Sounds of submission.
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Glenn McCrary May 2012
*******
I tread in diverse masks

Sheathed by barricades of fear

You shan’t gain answers shall you ask

I tread in diverse masks

Sip of pessimism from a flask

‘Tis the only sound I hear

I tread in diverse masks

Sheathed by barricades of fear
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Tony Novak Sep 2013
Letter
Hello
this is a short message
written this Sunday morning
on March the first

the rain keeps coming from the west
non-stop for two days
risk of flooding
government says.

I miss you - had another dream
driving in sunshine.
It's the sun I miss
mostly - and then of course
there is your friendship
to treasure and to hold.

I hope you're having fun
on your quad.
They say four wheels
are better than two
I'm not so sure
how could you
have Zen and the art of
quad biking -
impossible?

I see you have given in
to peer pressure or whatever
and made your modest entry
in the ******* book
I had a quick look.
It looks
OK.

Now I suppose Twitter
and MySpace
where you can compose
even wittier
sayings.

You're a true master
of Wisdom
with a capital W
But it is not that
you struggle to say something
wise
it comes spontaneously
best when blurted out
immediate response
like:
"they throw babies in dumpsters
in your country too, Janet?"

She'd never forgotten it
as it
was such a strange and powerful thing to say

by the way
I googled your name
and you have loads of coverage
mostly under AHEC and Best.

This is just a few short lines
to say you are on my mind
and in my heart
as always
yours
me.
Continue reading...
mike dm Feb 2016
a prosaic and utterly prolix rant that will change your life
I would humbly put forth the idea, quite prostrate, that it would do us some good if we were to put aside, for a time, our epistemological certainties and archetypal savior fixations and, instead, opt for a more robust, ocher-hued ontological preeminence: putting the what before the why.

Only then can one, say, sip hot herbal tea from an old pink bone china teacup and, without thinking about all the things all the time, for once -just- feel the sun's warmth on your aged face as it begins its set over a half-eaten cotton candy sky that is epic af and reminds you of Peter Pan and then Robin Williams and then whywhywhy and then something random and weirrrd, and, in doing so, you can watch the lack of shittogetherness, of which duly occupies the very seat of your character like a bully usurper that hits you bc "he loves you," melt into a very (very) temporary oblivion and revel in what is before you without feeling paralyzing angst that is, usually, soo angst-y that you gotta pronounce that **** in German as if you were Schopenhauerly sitting at some non-descript desk in some non-descript room with your hand stroking your truly descript crazygeniusguy hair that is some kind of proto-Wolverine hairdo (and you wonder if Stan Lee was cryptically tipping his cap to S's philosophical pessimism with this peculiar gesture; consider googling it but don't because you've already googled too much sheeyt today), thinking (or brooding) about how much of a ******* Descartes is with his whole, yuhknow, theory about some ******* secret nanoputian angelic chemist that sits at the pearly gates of the Pineal Gland and performs the sacred transduction of the divine ghost, or whatever. Otherwise you are, like, consumed with analysis, which is a complete ******* bore and - let's face it - a thoroughly transparent attempt to sound smarter than you actually are.

This herbal tea I'm currently drinking has "rose hips" in it. Dear botany, that image is fun.
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Viseract May 2016
A Lifetime of Fuckwits
This isn't a new story;
In fact it's quite old
I may have mentioned it before
But now this story must be told

All through my Primary years
All I had was sweat and tears
I had no friends and too many fears
I couldn't even trust my peers

I kept my secrets hidden deep;
They began to devour me
I tried to talk to somebody,
Please oh please, anybody!

I had begun to play yard games with kids
Who weren't really my friends
They used and abused me every day
Until I felt like it was the end

I blurted it out to them
"Stop this, I can't take it!
I have Aspergers, *******,
Do you know how I deal with it?"

They didn't know how I did it
They were absolutely speechless
Now I regret saying it
Till then it was only known by teachers

My simple reply
To the question I posed them
"I don't"
And a new level of bullying began

Now "******" actually meant something
"*******" was introduced
I regret ever opening my mouth
And helping these new taunts be produced!

Had to move schools because we were moving house
My first term in new uniform, new school and different people
I had hoped that moving would get me friends and less enemies
But no matter where you go, it seems, people are still evil!

I had a crush on a girl that year
And she was always taken
She swapped boyfriends so fast they called her a ****
If I'm not mistaken

I wrote her letters, I was too shy to talk
And the best bit? She wrote back
I kept her letters to this very day
But I did not know she would betray!

She showed my letters to some guys
These guys who used to tease me
I only found out through a friend
When he said he'd seen the pieces

She'd scattered them at the school pond
I found a piece hidden in the grass
It dawned on me that all her beauty
Hid a ******* *******!

She knew I went down to the pond
I ******* SAID SO, IN MY LETTERS!
She didn't feel guilty then
I thought that she was better!

That friend who told me, by the way
I made halfway through the year
He is and was an absolute legend,
Is my friend Pal Tear

Moving on to Year 8
New Year, New Me, right?
******* hell it wasn't
First term, and already in a fight!

Betrayed again by someone who
I had the trust to call a friend
Trusting others is one of my flaws
So I get stabbed again and again

Year 9 comes around
People look but do not speak
There is no reason to diss me
I'm no longer shy, submissive and weak

Instead they **** my anger
As I found out in Year 10
Thought the torture was over
That it wouldn't happen again!

Food scraps thrown at me
Names called from afar
I pretend I just don't care
But it's all a great big façade

I started to ponder
The sharpness of blades
And how easy it would be to cut myself
And try and replace the pain

For a pain I could tolerate
That in good time I would love
The blade would be my bestest friend
When I'd had enough

And so it came to be
For I got set in bad ways
These old habits die rather slowly
I've been trying, for so many days

I made a promise to a girl
A girl I loved, now all is neutral
That I would try not to cut
That a blade is, by far, more than that kind of useful

I'm still trying to stop
To this very day
But although I do it very little
I still get by with my wicked ways
...
#life #time #school #bully #primary #secondary #fuckwits
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Mike Essig Sep 2015
Manners
by Kim Addonizio*

Address older people as Sir or Ma’am

unless they drift slowly into your lane

as you aim for the exit ramp.

Don’t call anyone *******, *******, or *******;

these terms are reserved for ex-boyfriends

or anyone you once let get past second base

and later wished would be ****** into a sinkhole.

Yelling obscenities at the TV is okay,

as long as sports are clearly visible on the screen,

but it’s rude to mutter at the cleaning products in Safeway.

Also rude: mentioning ****** functions.

Therefore, sentiments such as “I went ***** to the wall for her”

or “I have to **** like a chick with a pelvic disorder at a kegger contest”

are best left unexpressed.

Don’t’ say “chick,” which is demeaning

to the billions of sentient creatures

jammed in sheds, miserably pecking for millet.

Don’t talk about yourself. Ask questions

of others in order to show your interest.

How do you like my poem so far?

Do you think I’m pretty?

What would you give up to make me happy?

Don’t open your raincoat to display your nakedness.

Fondling a ***** in public

is problematic, though Botero’s black sculpture

of a fat man in the Time-Warner building

in New York, his ***-*** rubbed gold,

seems to be an exception.

Please lie to me about your *******

and the permafrost layer.

Stay in bed on bad hair days.

When the pulley of your childhood

unwinds the laundry line of your dysfunction,

here is a list of items to shove deep in the dryer:

disturbed brother’s T-shirt,

depressed mother’s socks and tennis racket,

tie worn by ****** father driving the kids home

from McDonald’s Raw Bar. If you refuse

your host’s offer of alcohol, it is best to say,

“I’m so hung over, the very thought of drinking

makes me feel like projectile vomiting,”

or, “No thank you, it interferes with my medications.”

Hold your liquor whenever it is fearful

and lonely, whenever it needs your love.

Don’t interrupt me when I’m battering.

Divorce your cell phone in a romantic restaurant.

Here is an example

of a proper thank-you card:

Thank you for not sharing with me

the extrusions of your vague creative impulse.

Thank you for not believing those lies

everyone spreads about me, and for opening

the door to the next terrifying moment,

and thank you especially for not opening your mouth

while I’m trying to digest my roast chicken.
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Lee Jan 2013
Double Dobber Madness
How exactly does one find themselves in said situation
you didn't say anything about the situation yet
in description,
indisputably
incredible
incredible?
Not in any sense of tradition
Not in any sense that could bring sparkle and innocence to the surface of a child's eyes
Not in any sense immediately apparent to the unobservant man
cut to it *******
Clouds run think in the room
and with ink head to toe
and horns
and swazzies
and clantag black across the chest
and yellowed smokers teeth
golden oils burst hot in desperate lungs.
Relief.
Relief is what they name her
as her remnants drift from grateful mouths
as pale white and soulful as snow in reverse.
What's going on then?
They play a game.
They call it twenty five for missed medicine.
They say if the bell breathes smoke
on calls break the weak,
They hackle happily in a giggling choke.
But I could never participate in these things.
Is it a lack of courage, an overabundance of cowardice?
Its a lack of many things:
lacking history
or will
or wisdom
or faith
or a gut cold and steely enough to handle regurgitation
of my own lungs.
Not many do handle.
As is seen,
when a queen splatters palaces
with spigukums
liquid lowered expectations
only now could they take her seriously.
Do you?
I knew that fate from the start
and that's why I depart
to a cold blue board box
Roll, lick, pack, and light
delight
then again;
Who's to say I didn't enjoy it just as much as they did?
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Gaffer Jan 2017
2017
Now is the time for a long term relationship.
I declare my intentions online
Tazmin comes through. She’s just come out of a ten year relationship.
She could be the one.
Okay, she’s just come out of prison after ten years. Caught the boyfriend cheating on her.
Okay Tazmin, get back to you.
Right, Chantelle has split from her long time lover Rosie. She wants to try something new. But i need to get a *** change.
Don’t know if that’s lesbian humour or not.
Message from Candy. Get a life *******.
I just know she’s the one. But i’m not lowering myself to that level just yet.
Tina. ******* hate men.
You don’t know me Tina.
You’re a man, that’s enough.
Any sensible women out there.
Madge, I’m 84 looking for a relationship. My last lover died on the job.
Madge. For fucksakes take up knitting.
Listen up you lot, it’s not my problem  you can’t keep your men, or women.
Okay maybe shouldn’t have said that.
You *******. Followed by, I’ll stick they knitting needles where the sun don’t shine. I’ll do another ten years for you.  Oh, and. ****** tossing *******.
What the hell happened to the gentle ***.
This was not how I expected things to turn out.
Let's get back to basics
Any of you lot want to go out tonight and get ******, have unprotected ***. I’m paying.
Computer’s going nuts now.
I’m in.  You’re the man. Why didn’t you just say that the first time.
*******, can I bring a friend.
Happy birthday Paul.
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Sophie Healy Jun 2015
Forgetting You (Part Two to a Pathetic Love Story)
He made me feel dumb, he made me feel blue, oh god I can't believe I thought you were something new.

Yeah he was a ****, but you are too

I asked to hang out, you made it a date, then you stood me up you *******!

You built my hopes higher than the twin towers, then decided to bomb them.

You destroyed what could have been, and made me listen to your excuses from someone else

So makeup your mind because I am done with your *******
you have a good taste in girls, I'll give you that. But you don't know how to treat them, and that's a fact.
And that's when it all went down hill...
#poetry #anger #angst #ugh #again #guysseriouslysuck
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Jennifer Beetz Dec 2018
Return Unopened Portion
The worst part of being
left and half undone
is finding all of the
loose ends and
where was I
torn
(Me, ball of yarn
you, so many knitting
needles shoved in
one scar or another
and each time, indeed,
The inclination to pick up
where you left off pulled me
toward the worst and most
terrifying possibilities, a
nerve hanging by the thinnest
vein but I still yanked at it,
you see I would never
leave a job unfinished
even if the yanking of
the yarn undoes everything
one or the other of us
meant to finish
I've put too many hours
into this, gathering or
scattering, assembling
or finally tearing myself
to shreds
I've lost the meaning
or at the very least
shouldn't building
feel better than
destroying?
O what a hateful trench!
this could be, was for awhile
this life of mine then scattered
like each season, I expect nothing
more and less would be a blessing
I have lost the talent of
renewing myself and
never had the patience
to watch it come upon me
naturally so you see
The twelve year old
left half undone is still
waiting for me
Home. a word, not meant
for  that twig of a girl
Sometimes in a quiet rage
I imagine arriving home
disassembled as I am
(again, again, and again)
with my mouth made mute
by the layers of my dread
and so much packing tape-
I laugh to imagine a chorus
of folks intoning the word
Home and in all it's meaning

In the end I want to be
the worst most horrific
delivery ever landing on
your porch, no return address
because I have returned
with no intention of leaving
and even when I tell you to
handle me with care I doubt
you will recognize me
I've spent my life fancying
myself to be the kind of person
who would not ****** someone
like you but here's the problem
*******- no matter how well
I put myself together I always
end up back here, the ugly
part of you
I spewed this out and I sort of hate it but not enough to delete it. I think in my case the more emotionally entrenched I get in a poem, the less perspective I have to make a decent poem. which is to say that I think the really emotional ones that are all but torn out of my shaking fingers, tear stained scotch breathed too hungry to eat too large to hide under the sofa cushion, and not brave enough to die... ****. these kind of poems that I write ****. I don't feel any better by the way, heh heh... (okay, maybe saying that gave me a little laugh). sincerely J.B.
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mike dm Jan 2016
fyck this
his typewriter is silent
and tombstone;
mine is
nonexistent, and
never was. instead
all i have is this ******* device.
all it effing knows is
silence.

blinking c u r s o r
stares at me,
waiting, whitely, like some
bad god scrubbed good with a new book.

jus thought I'd
let you
know,
*******
dm micklow
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Yenson Mar 2019
Meeting with Head Honcho.....
Peps, here listen, hear me out
yeah I know you're all really doing your best
trouble is, your best isn't good enough

You're making us look like Keystone cops
all this haphazard stasis-cating around like drunk Ruskies
staying up late back early morning, obsessive yet incompetent

Yes, persistent is the key
thing is though, you're just too dumb
some of you think eggs grow on trees
after all there are  egg plants, so surely eggs come from trees
yes! and we all live in a yellow submarine!

Now listen to me, you plebs
Don't you know what 'Royalty' means
do you think its some wishy washy label from Primark
or some honor you can buy at a Car boot sale
No, you pumpkins, it's not and don't mention 1066
or that opinionated zealous fool, Oliver Cromwell

If you don't know it yet, better know now
our Royal Adversary is Simply The Best
this man is as good as you can get
we are talking Exceptional here
we are talking, top drawer, creme de la creme
we are talking, One of a Kind, the Real Deal, yes!

We are the majority, yes..fat lot of good, that has done
you're all as common as muck, ******, ******* twerps
that's all you are.
yadda yadda this, yadda yadda that we are attacking his psyche
it's psychological warfare, it's mental and emotional assaults
it's your mother's ***, you dumdum, the man is laughing at you
Christ! what's with you people, how useless are you!

I know half of you are demented psychos
and the other halves just plain simpletons and sheeps
now the blasted public are beginning to see that,
they are fed up, already!

I tell you now what your ******* problem is
you think we humans are all the same, you think he is on your level
you ***** think he thinks like you, sees like you, reacts like you.
You, yes you, are stupid, does he look stupid to you?
If you say yes, then you're even more stupid than I know

Just be ****** honest with yourselves and face facts
you are just common muck, oiks chewing straws
and the man is Class, quality, top grade, the business
gifted, talented, brave, courageous, exceptional and a ****** 'One of'  
The Man is simply ROYAL, that's nobility for you
and say or write any **** you want, that's the ******* TRUTH

Now, get lost and go continue your nonsense
and don't steal anything on you way out, that's all you're good for!
jingoistic trash, time wasters full of dog's crap.
And you men, if one can call you men, with your floppy tiddlers,
put aside your *****-envy complexes and engage your brains.
( What brains, actually? )
This is based on an except from a speech at a local Working Mens club, during the period when King George wanted to abdicate to go and marry Ms Wallace Simpson and the local people were dead against him.
#hahahah #hahahahhahaha #taking #the #**** #commoners #brainlessness
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Valarola Nikola Oct 2020
F**k You Paul
******* and your ******* face Paul,
Cause you must have tripped me to make me fall,
(This hard for you)
******* and your ******* wife Paul,
Cause you don't know how to tell the truth at all,
(Unless it benefits you)

Who let you out of the cage into the general population?
Someone ****** up somewhere for that to happen,
You don't care about anyone but the reflection that looks back at you,
And I've been waiting patiently for the day you get caught at what you do,
Think you hide so well all the girls you juggle like it's okay,
But you've been dropping *****, all over the place,
And I'll expose you one of these days,
For all the lies you say,

******* and your ******* face Paul,
Cause you must have tripped me to make me fall,
(This hard for you)
******* and your ******* mistress Paul,
Cause you don't know how to tell the truth at all,
(Unless it benefits you)

Hey *******, I didn't call you that cause you're good at head,
I named you that cause you can't even do that right in bed,
More O's more with a man I met a few months ago,
Than you who I've been ******* with 2 1/2 years next fall,
You think you're Gods gift to women,
You're not even close in my opinion,
In fact if you call, I'll be busy washing my hair,
For the foreseeable future, so how about we not anymore?

******* and your ******* face Paul,
Cause you must have tripped me to make me fall,
(This hard for you)
******* and your ******* side chicks Paul,
Cause you don't know how to tell the truth at all,
(Unless it benefits you)
#done #breakup #toxic #fboy #byeboy
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Toxic yeti Dec 2018
Locked up.
The curse won't let up, it won't let me out, (im in hell)
The curse won't ley up, it won’t let me out, (im in damnation)
They curse won’t let up, it won't let me out, (im in gitmo )
The curse won’t let up, it won't let me out

Trying to find love
Only getting hurt by *******
Hoping to find a ride or die
Only finding a *******
Climbing mountains
To teach stop the ignorance.  
To stop the stigma.  


The curse won't let up, it won't let me out, (im in hell)
The curse won't ley up, it won’t let me out, (im in damnation)
They curse won’t let up, it won't let me out, (im in gitmo )
The curse won’t let up, it won't let me out

Trying to find enlightenment
Only seeing blood drinkers
Hoping to find a meaning in life
Only finding a pile of ****
Being mutt
A freak
What the hell should I do.  

The curse won't let up, it won't let me out, (im in the hellfire)
The curse won't ley up, it won’t let me out, (im in hades)
They curse won’t let up, it won't let me out, (im in SAN Quentin)
The curse won’t let up, it won't let me out


The curse won’t let up, it won’t let me out.
#broken #hearts #anger #relationships #love #lost #poem #poetry #poems
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James Floss Jan 2018
FIRST DAMNDMENT
*******!

It’s a new word.
**** it!
I first heard it on NPR.

I read it then in the
SFChron then the
NYTimes.

Word.

Language evolves,
Some people don't.

What *******
Coined that term?

Which wounded *****
Will take this ******* down?

Semantics matters–
Vulgarities smatter.

Good luck to us all.

(me too)
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— The End —