"bowlers" poems
Even the sun-clouds this morning cannot manage such skirts.
Nor the woman in the ambulance
Whose red heart blooms through her coat so astoundingly ----
A gift, a love gift
Utterly unasked for
By a sky
Palely and flamily
Igniting its carbon monoxides, by eyes
Dulled to a halt under bowlers.
O my God, what am I
That these late mouths should cry open
In a forest of frost, in a dawn of cornflowers.
28.5k
Oh you may not think I’m pretty,
But don’t judge on what you see,
I’ll eat myself if you can find
A smarter hat than me.
You can keep your bowlers black,
Your top hats sleek and tall,
For I’m the Hogwarts Sorting Hat
And I can cap them all.
There’s nothing hidden in your head
The Sorting Hat can’t see,
So try me on and I will tell you
Where you ought to be.
You might belong in Gryffindor,
Where dwell the brave at heart,
Their daring, nerve, and chivalry
Set Gryffindors apart;
You might belong in Hufflepuff,
Where they are just and loyal,
Those patient Hufflepuffs are true
And unafraid of toil;
Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,
if you’ve a ready mind,
Where those of wit and learning,
Will always find their kind;
Or perhaps in Slytherin
You’ll make your real friends,
Those cunning folks use any means
To achieve their ends.
So put me on! Don’t be afraid!
And don’t get in a flap!
You’re in safe hands (though I have none)
For I’m a Thinking Cap!
Jan 13, 2013
Jan 13, 2013 at 6:18 PM UTC
Some say it should go burn in hell
That the money leaves a really bad smell
But hit and giggle
Or **** and piddle
It's here to stay the IPL.
From countries far and wide
Come players with heaps of pride
But if they fail
You'll hear them wail
For there is not anywhere to hide
The cheques books come out
The auctioneers will shout
Some Players get bought
Some others get naught
The IPL now has such clout
The turn-styles are all in clamour
The Batsmen are using the hammer
They go for the big six
Bowlers try their new tricks
So cricket is married to glamour
Should cricket become this glam
When the ball is met with a blam
hit way in the air
didn't see you there
Sorry about that Maam!
Feb 9, 2010
Feb 9, 2010 at 10:52 PM UTC
Klusener could whack it, yes Lance,
To spinners, down wicket, he'd dance,
No defensive tricks,
He smote them for six,
The same for the quicks without prance.
Sometimes he could bowl pretty quick,
Sometimes the batsmen he'd trick.
Gave balance to the side,
Served country with pride,
All without ever being a *****
His best score V England, remember?
Our bowlers he got to dismember.
Zulu hit it so high
Way up into the sky,
It didn't come down 'til November.
Mar 1, 2010
Mar 1, 2010 at 10:40 AM UTC
the Boxing Day test cricket match
has just begun
with the Indian bowlers
out to stymie the Australian's run
they'll be keeping
their cherry ball deliveries tight
so the lads from Oz
don't get any easy flight
on the wicket there will be
a momentous Waterloo battle
the Indian side shall need
all of its line and length chattel
no loose ***** going awry
into the four's ditch
they'll have to be spot on
when sailing down the pitch
in the first session of play
India can't afford one mistake
or their teams shall be left
in the Aussie team's shattering wake
as the innings progresses
throughout the day
the Australian side
will surely be making hay
the pride of both cricketing nations
is at stake on the MCG
those vying to win the spoils of the test
shall require a flawless key
runs aplenty are on offer on the pitch
for the Aussie boys
so the Indian bowlers must forestall
their batting ploys
Dec 25, 2014
Dec 25, 2014 at 8:32 PM UTC
Paris sits at a heart-shaped table, her lamplight eyes dimming for the morning. She pumps a tube of mascara, yawning.
“Oi!”
Paris jumps, troubled by the noise. “Oh no. Not you.” She says, blusher brush poised.
London doffs his rooftops like ten million battered bowlers.
“Nice to see you too. Not a morning girl, eh?”
Paris shakes her lovely head in a flurry of churchbells. “For you mon cher, there’s no right time of day.”
(The Channel chuckles, unsettling ships, as Dover reclines in her cloud of talc and giggles like a tickled bluebird.)
London utters a swearword. “You don’t like me, do you?”
“You’re not fit to lick my shoe.” Paris scowls, adjusting the Eiffel Tower until it sits slap-bang in the middle of her head like a crown.
“What hard work you are!” London howls, slamming a fist into the Serpentine.
Calais shrugs his trees, bored. “Mon dieu – get a room.”
Sep 9, 2013
Sep 9, 2013 at 9:53 AM UTC
Conversation watching cricket flows
Between corporate strangers who
Work together but know nothing of
The others’ lives outside the office
Where work-life balance is a myth
The bowlers bowl and the batsmen bat.
Not much happens between innings
On the field, but the action is in the
Stands, as wickets fall, the barriers
Between spectators vanish, and new
Understandings develop, all because
The bowlers bowl and the batsmen bat.
Wine that universal lubricant, moves
From polite engagement to introspective
Intent to solve all our corporate problems
The laser-like focus as new friends grow
Closer than that 22 yards seem as the
The bowlers bowl and the batsmen bat.
Jan 28, 2016
Jan 28, 2016 at 5:42 AM UTC
It was good to have Lumb in the side,
South African birthright aside!
Though we must be fair,
Shane Warne got him there,
He smashed all the bowlers with pride.
Our bowlers used plenty of thought,
Even Broad who often dropped short,
He did it with style,
And showed us his guile,
And everything hit up was well caught.
The Aussies expected to chin us,
They didn't think we had it within us
In that final meeting
We gave them a beating.
England the T-20 Winners.
We made them look like beginners,
Or old forgotten dog's dinners,
The Aussies got thrashed,
Their bowling was smashed.
England are T-20 winners!
May 19, 2010
May 19, 2010 at 12:01 AM UTC
come in multitudes
come in boots, pulled up, strapped
come with hairnets, bowlers, beers
come with husbands and mothers
the starlets come, the celebrities
the politicians and adversaries
bring your conflicts
bring your problems
stoners, bring your insights
bring philosophies and religions
bring visions, or lack thereof
bring weekdays and weeknights
bring the sofa
bring reality shows or documentaries
bring the series
and bring the cat
but come
with quirks and queers,
with stubbornness with anger
with broken glasses and fists
with fits of rage, with opinions
statements, facts, figures, conspiracies
bring every one of these, but come
with your broken hearts and talents
or genius, or with yesterday’s news
with the crosswords and comics
or the convicts or the cartoons
- hell, we’ve got more than enough room
Sep 27, 2013
Sep 27, 2013 at 7:06 AM UTC
the Australians are playing
a good brand of cricket
they've got the English
at sixes and sevens at the wicket
our bowlers seem to be bowling
with much strength
all their delivers
are of a fine line and length
last time we met the English
in an Ashes Series
our Australian team
played like a lot of old ladies
but they've made
some key changes to the team
which shall yield
our cricket side a winning dream
play to-day sees
the English batting at the wicket
they've a bit of work
to do on their cricket
the Australian team
are drilled to perfection
with all their plays
going in the right direction
the Australian's
catching and fielding has improved
we'll be making sure
that all the English are removed
twill be a goodly day
at the Gabba Cricket Ground
watching the English batting
heading outbound
Nov 22, 2013
Nov 22, 2013 at 6:38 PM UTC
You are a cricketing wonder
For bowlers you are a thunder
You entered the arena two decades ago
And do not have the slightest ego
Runs flow from your magic wand
Like pebbles from a brook
Many cricketers your counsel seek
You climbed the cricketing peak
You have made tons and tons of runs
In twenty one years
And broke each and every record
And you are our triumph card
You don’t care spin or pace
And have incredible grace
The great Don Bradman invited you for dinner
Undoubtedly You are India’s greatest winner
You make every Indian proud
Across the globe you pull the crowd
You are great in any form of cricket
When you bat, the ball is out of sight
But one achievement still eludes you
Your dream shall come true
And you will be a part of winning world cup
Then Every Indian with love stand up
Dec 28, 2010
Dec 28, 2010 at 6:19 AM UTC
the local lads
put in a good showing
at the regional
bowling championships
though they were defeated
they played exceptionally well
John won three ends in his match
but his opponent from Armidale
had a better game on the day
he sent many a fine shot
towards the jack
the tournament
was well organized
and all the participants
were able to wet their whistles
on time
when they went to the championships
last year
they all complained about
being kept on the greens
for ages
and none of them
got a beer
until well after
five thirty
as the old bowlers adage goes
it is better to be well up
than too short
Nov 30, 2013
Nov 30, 2013 at 8:14 PM UTC
It was all silk and sawdust
Mamas skirts rustled a sunday mass
and dad wore his bowler hat tilted at an angle
(dirk bogarde -like look)
But he was a farmer.
soon after the service was over
he'd hang his hat by the cowsheds
and wallow in green slushy poo
irrespective of how much it stank
and how natural he looked
throwing sawdust over the caked green pancakes
and shovelling all that crap into a corner,
with sundays best clothes on!
Mama insisted he change first
but no. "The cows need attention
as much as god does, Mama"
We did not argue with his farmyard philosophy
but that's where we cut our teeth
and tasted a mans love for his animals
both human and beast and that's where
we understood that sunhats, bowlers
and polished walking sticks
were just statements that didn't come
from a book- but society. Somehow
he mixed the two learnings
to get along with everything.
I missed him when he milked his last cow
and lay down forever in that quiet evening
as the sun set in an orange sky. The brightest star
that night climbed over the eastern ridges
to grace the night. Dad?
© Marshall Gass. All rights reserved.
Apr 1, 2014
Apr 1, 2014 at 4:18 PM UTC
Now It’s CLEAR That I Am ... " GIFTED " ...
When It Comes To Writing Lyrics ... !!!
Articulated Scriptures ...
That Paint Descriptive Pictures ...
of How It Is We’re Living ...
Ism After ... ISM ...
Corruption and Division ...
That’s Bred By Politicians ...
EVEN ON A Day Like THIS ...
December ... 25th ...
I’m STILL Presenting Gifts ...
Through Written Scripts Like THIS ... !!!
That QUICKLY FLIP ...
DIFFERENT Subjects ... !!!
From Politics To Those Whose Gifts ...
Gave Out Some ... SERIOUS LIKS’ ... !!!!!!
Just Like The GREAT ... “ King Viv “ ... !!!
A Cricketer ... SO GIFTED ... !!!
When It Came To Playing Cricket ...
And PROTECTING ... His Wicket ...
That Bowlers RARELY Hit It ... !!!!!!!!
While Others Like ... USAIN ...
Had Gifts That Made Them Train ...
In Ways That Gained ... " Olympic Fame " ... !!!
TOO Many IN FACT ... For This Poem To Name ... !!!
So Let’s Move On ...
To Gifts That Belong ...
In ... OTHER Realms ...
Like ****** Gifts ...
YES ... BIG OL’ Well ...
You Know What It Is ... Or ... Do You ... ?!?
Do You Know What It Is To Be The One Who GIVES ...
MULTIPLE ... ******** Rides ... !!!?!!!
Well I’m ... One of THOSE GUYS ... !!!!!
My Ex and I ... ENJOYED Those Nights ....
Where She Would Be Riding Just Like ...
Those Guys With Gifts To Ride Motorbikes ...
In Ways That THRILLED When She Got FILLED ...
With MUCH MORE Than The ... AVERAGE Man ...
And YES That’s FACT So ... DON’T Doubt That ... !!!!!!!
Such Gifts Are COOL But Now I’m Fuelled ...
To Use My Gifts To ... EXPLAIN Things ...
As I Said At The Start I Now Use My ARM ...
To ARTICULATE Visions of How We’re Now Living ...
So Gifts of THIS TYPE ...
Tend To CHALLENGE The Minds ...
of Those Who Are ...................................................... “ Sly “ ...
Because of The Gift That ... REALITY Brings ... !!!
A Bite That DEFIES The Spreading of LIES ... !!!
But One That Bears Witness ...
To TRUTH And LESS Sinning ... !!!
So ... As I Now End ...
I’m Back To The Beginning ... !!!
I Articulate Scriptures ...
That Paint Descriptive Pictures ...
of How It Is ... " We’re Living " ...
Because It’s ... CLEAR ...
When It Comes To Writing Lyrics ...
That I Am One ... Who’s ...
.......... “ GIFTED “ ..........
Dec 25, 2019
Dec 25, 2019 at 7:32 PM UTC
An acquaintance once advised me
Not to fret over Recruitment
Because it is the easiest job in the world
I have blocked him
But that's not the point
The point is
Recruitment is a pile of work
That keeps growing bigger and bigger
Until it surpasses Mount Everest
And it is also a fly
That keeps hovering tantalisingly above you
Daring you to swat it aside
Before making "The Great Escape"
At the eleventh hour
As far as today was concerned
Recruitment was losing the toss
And watching your bowlers being carted around for boundaries
In all sorts of directions
While enduring a long day in the field
Under the blistering heat of a raging summer
That has already wreaked havoc
Across the entire nation
Who knows what tomorrow may bring
In any case
We do know one thing for sure
Recruitment is anything but an easy job
May 6, 2022
May 6, 2022 at 12:28 PM UTC
That bowlers cap fit you incredibly well.
A monocle for the laughs.
Constantly with a cigar.
A perfectly formed stash.
Never a hair out of place.
The personality of a tie-dye shirt.
The face of a businessman.
Rest in peace Tim.
You were more than a good man.
Truthfully a Titan.
Farewell Monopoly Man.
Heaven won't know what hit 'em.
Jul 18, 2019
Jul 18, 2019 at 11:04 PM UTC
Oh what a scene
Cricket being played on a field of green
Eleven players per team all dressed in whites
What a fabulous, glorious sight
Bowlers bowl, Batsmen bat
Umpires keep the score, was he out, "howzat"
Bowlers aim not too high, not too low
Bowlers bowl not too fast and not too slow
Batsmen notching up the runs
Receiving the ball at full speed, hitting the ball to the boundary for a four
If their lucky they will hit it for six, over the boundary bar
A coin is tossed for who bats first, the losing team defending
Six ***** per over, 50 overs per inning
Who scores the most is the team that is winning
A few rules to abide
Keep your leg to the side, dont get caught leg before wicket
Bowlers of pace, try to keep the ball away from the batsmans face
If you are caught out before you score, a duck will appear on the scoreboard
A century is of course one hundred runs, simply known as a ton
Then comes a break for afternoon tea, sandwiches and cakes all freshly baked
The second team step up to the mark
For this typically English game in the park
Families attend from far and wide to watch the battles of the two cricket sides
Battling it out on a field of green, halcyon days continuing
Jun 12, 2018
Jun 12, 2018 at 3:15 PM UTC
From the incrimination of the whole
they gave us a paved road to nowhere
the Victorian homeless cougars
have only recently found their hearts
(undoubtedly to the honkys)
and who escaped
for the sky
was not alive
or sopping
or green
this miserable workplace
over the edge
for butcher's lines
~was not raven black
the spoons
or forerunners
(from dazzling peninsulas)
left alone
off the center
of the parking lot
the real city
of buggy stalled wanderings
~was not flesh stained
off the front of
private beaches
stood resplendent bottoms
sprung off low ebbs
for the dark world
and our fathomless silences
trumpets and banjoes
and electric mandolins
are thrown from the solitude
ear studs
and obscurity
out of the footsteps of
spontaneous supporters
the vital blood arrayed
without moonless stasis
and desert buckets
woodlands unkempt
against the mountain run
halted plains straightened
after the catch
***** martinis
and stiff bowlers
valley the single marcher
shetlands
and peasants
see clear to the horizon
Apr 2, 2017
Apr 2, 2017 at 9:56 PM UTC
I was missing Julia because she left me
And a new girl came close to me
From bowling it was rad
The best girl I ever had
We went to bowl
Had red rooster it was tasty
Then we went to bowling
At Belconnen yeah
Then after that she went back to my house
And I showed her my own private bowling alley
Which was just a computer game on
A 90s computer
We played lots and lots of games
Right into the night
Listening to 2CA on the radio
She liked all the songs I liked
She told me I wasn’t weird
Which is what I wanted to hear
You see we also went out dancing
On a Saturday night
We stayed on the dance floor all night
I wanted to know the footy score
But she wanted me to think of her
But I found it fun back then
A lot of fun
It was dinner and dancing
So radical dude
We also stayed at the bowling alley all night till 6 am
My eyes were really tired
But I had fun doing all this every weekend
As we bowled most of the nights
With all the pro bowlers
I got on well with everyone
We also filled in our days playing
On my own private bowling alley
Yes she was nice and to her I was nice
And I loved playing pool with both girls
One at school and one at club
Rad matey
And I loved being her tenpin bowling doubles partner with some guys as well
Aug 9, 2024
Aug 9, 2024 at 8:12 AM UTC