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I got this feeling where my soul is so weary that it's completely shattered.
It's strange and surreal how I don't get it.
I tried pouring it into the pages, but even the words failed to describe them.
The ink, it spilled all over my heart to fix it,
But even that ink couldn't soothe the sorrow within me.

Is it the world, or is it me, trying to ruin my soul?
I wonder how it feels to be truly understood.
Because I was always the one to understand everything, and it is a cruel curse to perceive things so perfectly.

I just failed so miserably while letting myself drown in the air, feeling suffocated yet breathing.
The wound in my heart was never healed.
It only deepened with each fleeting moment.
It bled so much that it turned the pages red.

I just yearn for someone to see the true me, not the mirror within that echoes the grief of mine.
But in the process of healing my wound, I lost everything my heart always longed for.

My soul, it is trapped in the agony of existing in this world.
It burned in the blaze of illusion and left the ashes behind,
And the wind grew so heavy that even the ashes faded away eventually.
Joss Lennox Apr 14
A million different jobs.
A million different personas.
As an adult, it's hard knowing,
"what you want to be when you grow up."
While considered "normal" in your twenties,
not so much in your thirties and beyond.
In a world that's consistently changing from one day to the next,
why aren't we allowed the same respect?
We, as parents, wear many hats in order to provide,
they label it multitasking, we're doing it to survive.
Trial and error is the only way to truly be happy in life,
otherwise you're just committed to a career you despise.
That doesn't make one irresponsible, just more knowledgeable.
Two things can be true; you can have a stable career,
and still be a writer on the side.
You can follow your dreams,
and still support your family.
I wrote this about a time I was criticized for waiting to be in my 30's, deciding to work on becoming a writer/poet still working another job while being a wife and mother. Though, I feel like most of us have a job and creative outlets. We don't always figure out who we are or what we want to do in our twenties or younger. Some of us don't have the privilege. Best not to judge, when you don't know the circumstance.
Zelda Apr 14
This life was a mistake
A choice I wasn't given
A story I didn't write

Prune the branches
The wounds weep
Sap like sorrow—
Grief without end

Sever the root
To bring relief
But the story withers—
And still, the ache remains

I'm at a crossroads
All I write is wrongs

  A rootless thing,
  Still reaching—
  I never asked for this

I am afraid of death’s kindness,
But life is no friend of mine
April 14, 2025
6 a.m.
The alarm sounds.
Eyes open slowly,
Fighting the pull of sleep.

7:30 a.m.
Coffee in my mug,
I race out the door.
I’m late
Yet somehow,
There’s still time to think of you.

12 p.m.
The phone rings endlessly.
Paperwork piles up,
Fork in my salad,
The first bite pulls my mind to you.

3 p.m.
Meetings drag.
Click-clack of typing,
Emails constantly pinging
Until 5 p.m.
And my hands tingle,
Knowing it’s almost time.

6 p.m.
The pan sizzles.
The air fills with the scent of ground beef.
The door creaks open
My husband greets me.
The TV hums softly.
Bowls of pasta in our laps,
And still, I think of you.

9:30 p.m.
Water boils in the kettle.
A steaming mug finds his hands,
While mine search for you.

I open my laptop,
Eyes aching from the screen,
But I can take a little more—for you.

The mouse hovers over a small document.
Tea steams as the page loads.
I smile.
Hands rest on the keys,
And I begin to weave.
Vida Mar 30
I've only recently been able to admit to the idea that I am depressed
No
A person with depression
I know I have things
I have a history
I think in my head an attempt isn't depression
Just a bad decision

Symptoms of depression include
• Irritability
• Difficulty concentrating
• Lack of energy
• insomnia or excessive sleeping

Obviously I don't have those
I'm not irritable I'm probably just hungry
I haven't been able to concentrate my whole life. Why start now
I'm a teenager of course i'm tired
It's not sleeping excessively I just like naps

Its that **** phone
If your room weren't such a mess
Get out more
Socialize
There's light at the end of the-

Shut up

Two years ago I tried to end my life
Downed a bottle of pain meds and a canister of albuteral
All to wake up with just a sore throat
It didn't work so here I am again
Against my own worse judgements
Too tired to try again so I'm just gonna go to sleep

So now I'm going to sleep
tomorrow I will remember how to be happy.
And then by 2pm I'll forget again
Completing the circle
I currently only have two followers on HePo
With the amount of views, my poems are getting Please help a girl out and follow me 🙏🏾
Vida Mar 30
I don't think the world would comprehend what I mean when I say I have intuitive thoughts.
When I say I think about grabbing a knife from the cupboard and
I'm not gonna finish that one
The thoughts bleed from my head.
I look like carrie
Obscene words cover me from top to bottom
Next time you get in the shower you should water board yourself
Put a fork in the microwave and watch it explode in your face
Get ready in the morning with a nice ice bath for your face, just use boiling water
Clip your nails, clean off. Keep cutting.
You should shave until there's nothing left
Bleed
Cut
Bleed
But those intrinsive thoughts aren't silly and funny
So i'm gonna stick to
You should eat that whole jar of nutella
Obviously this isnt one of my best but how do you get through a rough patch. You write
Vida Mar 28
I've never been in love but I can imagine it
Matching fits, talking bout cats n ****
Be my man ill be your *****
Ride or die
When I'm with you we'll fly
Superman, cheer for you in the stands
Here for you till the end
My man will be perfect
Absolutely no flaws he'll have it all
Speed dial no need to call
Cause my man will have it all
Cause my man
My man
I haven't met you yet and I know you'll be perfect
Because in the ocean of my dreams I see you surfing
I'm learning
That everything i do is leading up to you
And everything you do and see is for the moment you meet me
Don't that just make you cheese
The duo we'll be
whole world to see
My man and me
I'm still not in love, B is amazing and honestly the best him I could ever know but I like the quiet of nothing. This was also meant to have a beat so someone rap it
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