At dusk, the beast prowls,
unbidden, through my bedroom
with a ravenous appetite.

Famished, he devours me
and drowns in my gore.

My failures cascade down my flesh
Wondering, will you make me whole again?
I don’t even care to try
Better to clutch this bottle and
Let the amber hit my throat
Better to soak my suffering in brown
And let the sweet haze take over me

I feel you festering in my throat
Searing my lungs
Living in the moment, I inhale my self-destruction,
Casually chasing my own death
But you give me more warmth than they ever do,
Your toxicity on my tongue
Tastes so much better than their words

Eyelids flutter,
Tonight I am alive.

There you laid
on my lap,
as you died.
There you laid,
holding me close,
telling me how,
you love me so.
I was so mad,
so filled with rage.
I didn't say it back.
You chose a cigarette
over your life,
you chose your vice
over your child.
Now you're gone
and I am lost.
You're not around
and I can't trust.
Hate in my heart,
not to you,
but to me.
Tears in my eyes,
as I write this.
My souls is shattered,
it's pieces scattered.
Now I'm here full of regret,
with your vice
now turned mine.
Where can I go?
This is how
I hold onto you.
This is how
I move on
This is how my heart
is scattered
singing the same old song.
I regret it now
and it'll always hurt,
but forever my king.
I'll hold you close

Just because
being kind is my vice,
Don't break me.