A shimmer in her eyes, a temptation or desire
Not for the average allurement; money nor lust
Perhaps for a seducement more deeper,
A fancy for death?
Mask it with a façade of happiness. A laugh. A smile.
Why, you might ask?
She doesn't not want to have anyone worry over her mental sake,
The feeling of not being worthy enough for their tender emotions.
She builds bridges but ends up burning it to ash,
Afraid of letting anyone get to close to her
Many important people had come and go,
Stomping, ripping, smashing and destroying her blazing heart.
People who did not deserve to know her like that.
Taking her trust, love and happiness with them.
Disappointment plays a big roll in her life,
Not against herself, but within the deep confines of relationships, hope, and love.

She burns bridges faster than she builds them,
and she is me.

Once whom I considered my very best friend
To now my worst enemy
Sticks and stones may break my bones but words won't hurt me...

No that does not apply
Your words have spread to those who I used to adore .
As easy as it was for that knife to slit into my back is how easy it broke me down.
In ways in which I have no words to describe..
But what's worse is the image on your face after all you've done and your apology is so cunning ...
Some how there is still something within me which only wants to forgive.
Now I'm torn
I'm confused ..
Shall I move on so I mustn't be hurt like this or shall I keep you close for enemies your supposed to keep the closest

© Jenn Linh

trust, mine own enemy mine
i trust you less than i love you
and i don't love you much

love, my distant friend
your fingertips ghost my skin
once every couple lifetimes

hate, another's waste of time
i haven't the capacity to give
someone i dislike so much thought

anger, you abusive lover
kiss my knuckles when you bruise them
warm me from the inside

anger, you deserve three stanzas
such a permanent fixture in my life
always there, by my side

anger, warm me from the inside
'til i overheat and explode
winter isn't here but there's cold in my bones

I don’t believe in fairy tales
But if I did, I think that I
Would unfold wings
Of light metal
Learn to fly
With glinting rings
Of gold upon my brow
Writhing ‘round my ankles,
gilded snakes eternal.

I’d imbibe my blood
Which would decree
If good or evil I would be
Watch the fates a circle 3
Weave the thread that makes me, me.

And when I died
I’d have been brave
My ghost would dance
Upon my grave
Before seeking salvation’s solace.  
Never to be soulless.

And maybe with this world of
Witchcraft ingrained in my mind
Would be that feeling others find
So easily; the leap of faith into
An embrace
A rush upon
Seeing a face
Anyone, everyone, true love
for the One--
another Holy Grail...

But it'd take a witch’s brew
To make me “fall in love” with you.
For I haven’t believed in fairy tales
Since once upon a time.
When heroes become monsters
Loving is a crime.

Surrounded by a bunch of fake friends, claiming
"We don't talk like we used to anymore,"
Passing blame like cigarettes,
And stifling the urge to choke:

Strong men. Even the sponge of our lungs is hardened
Stainless steel because no broken promises
Are gonna mar the way we breathe,
**** panic attacks; just contain it 'til we implode

Volcanoes collapsing in on themselves,
Chests crumbling, collapsing, converted into ash
Blood turned lava, thick like the way we all used to be
(Thick as thieves, thick as thieves)

And hot as the temper that erupts in me
Every time you fog my head with morphine,
Numb the pain your lies have caused me
Have me lie back and swallow down pills

Am I supposed to just take what you've given me
And ignore what you've taken from me?
Thick as thieves, thick as thieves:
Why'd you steal from me?

after some time
and some distance
it's safe to say that
i love you
like a best friend,
and i can't describe
the relief that brings me.

my heartbeat
doesn't feel so painful,
not anymore,
and i breathe
so much easier
now that i know
i'll never have to write
another heartbroken word about you
ever again.

god, i love you still,
i really, really do;
but it's so much easier now,
not struggling to swim
through raging waves
under the weight of
expectations and assumptions,
hesitation and guilt

it's so much easier
to be in love with you
with almost none of the romance
that went with it before,
and i really hope that
you're okay with that,
because you promised me:

"you're enough", you said.
and it took every ounce of courage
dredged up
from the marrow of these aching bones
to trust you,
to believe you,
to dare to allow that someone―
that you―
could love me
unconditionally.

i asked you;
you lied.

i wondered,
"don't you trust me?"

i looked at you:
transparent, always a bad liar,

to the point where
it becomes enraging;

your lies mounting―
blatant, obvious

i looked at your sullen face,
felt myself grow bitter

i wondered,
"didn't our love once taste sweeter?"

i asked again;
you lied again.

i wondered,
"when did you regress?"

i wondered,
"when did we regress?"

it felt like
twelve steps forward, thirteen back.

maybe we're just meant to be
unlucky.

It's not worth
being that open
and trusting,
it's a death trap.

l.v.s

Some may say I'm lonely - but they don't have a clue.
I have the best friend there could possibly be.
I may not be able to see him, but why should that matter?
I know that I can trust him - he won't tell a soul.
Not like "real people" who lie, cheat and snitch on you.
My friend may be nameless, but he is always here for me.
Not like you.
You come and go as you please; you hurt me and betray me.
You say "I'm just a phone call away."
Yet when I call, you never pick up.
He is always there - just a thought away;
He never lies;
Never cheats;
Never snitches.
Do you honestly blame me for having "trust issues"?
Well, that's your problem.