Ever since we parted ways,
My body didn't know how to feel,
my heart lost beats
Now I'm filled with chills and creeps


When I was alone and broken
You took my hand and I awoken
When the chains of torment wrapped around me-
you deserted me,
in fact-
You could only flee
You were a coward to all
But I pretended you would never let me fall

I should have known better
Three steps from life
I could only clutch to a knife
I bled, needing only you
Shinning nobility-that was you

The cancer of hatred, took hold
Once again I'm alone in this cold
My trust wasted, now dust
I don't think I can be relieved
There's no reason to ever have believed

Thanks to you,
Whenever I spot the rain
I'm reminded of all this pain
This dismantled being-
has no faith
Thank to you,
I've lost all there is to *gain

I know you feel
Intelligence flows within
Thanks be unto you

The confidence that I gave her
abolished that insidious
shroud of self doubt
she wore about her shoulders,
but now it seems
that when she believes
in herself
I don that cold shroud
and hide in it's folds
of insecurity.

The light I held her in
cast me in the shadow
of her darkness,
and now the brightness
that she shines with
just tends to hurt my eyes
and burn my skin.

I'm happy this way,
cold and afraid,
because though I may lose her,
I know this to be true,
it'll be her turn to find someone
that is lost in the darkness
and make them shine brightly too.

The little things open my eyes to reality.
The things I do,
The things others do.
Oh I finally see it alright,
First hand indeed.
I'm glad the truth is revealed.
If the situation were reversed,
I would've done things differently.
Just know
help is wanted,
help is given,
*help is taken away.

I need some assistance to find my way,
though I don't know where my destination is.
I wish I understood what was going on,
I really don't.
Sometimes I'm fine,
Sometimes I'm super happy and free,
Other times?
Y'all don't want to know.
I'm exhausted,
I'm tired of those times.
Why can't it be over?

I'm done pretending to care.
I'm done being toyed with.
I was just a piece,
in the game of life.
one that was moved around,
Never realizing that I actually never mattered.
Things were decided for me,
I was twisted and turned to be someone,
someone that I didn't recognize.
Someone who was hopeless, who was afraid.
But now,
Things are going to change,
because I'm changing them.
I was moved before,
Now it's time for me to pick up my own piece,
and move on.  
*I'm done

My eyes burn,
I lie awake, rereading the text.
Trying to answer the questions,
trying to memorize the statements.
I stare, I cry, I shake it off, I repeat.
This will help me someday?
Maybe, but for now,
It's keeping my mind off of life.
Having a lot of homework;
a great excuse not to talk to people.
To be secluded in your room all day,
the only light is your computer screen,
as you type away trying to finish.
Every once and awhile,
Life comes to ***** me over.
Homework is there to save me from it.
But, you know what?
I'm learning to punch life back in the face,
and that's all that matters.
To all y'all out there,
Stay Strong.
You can get through this.

I read and reread
Again and a again
Each time finding something new
Each time wondering about somthing different
When I can't think
When I can't clear my head
When I'm bored
When I need inspiration
When I'm haveing a bad day
Or when I'm in an awkward social situation
I scroll down as far as it will load
Then I start to read
I could read almost anything you've written a thousand times and never get bored
I wish I could write them all down and make a book
I'd call it the The Golden One and take it with me where ever I go
There's somthing more comforting about pulling out a book instead of a phone