shadows cloud the deep crevices of my mind
begging for their evil to be carried out
their very presence causes pain
a constant droning in my heart
as i try to ignore them
to stand my ground
they tighten their grip
and unsheathe their swords

some days i can raise my shield
but here's the thing.
One can only hold up a shield so long
One can only withstand so many BLOWS
GET OUT OF MY HEAD
please... get out.........................
God, I'm feeling   w      e
                                                    a   ­                                     
                           ­                                       k
Take the pain AWAY

.......

or..... if you could at least let me access.....

......something..........            anything.......­............

    A        N          Y           T         H            I                N             G   !!!!!!!

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./,w/.'h';';a''{[]t[_-s--';'',,,./'';'];]\r[::,'...e/,,';][][a][]'l.','.,'.>><,.'/.,',.]{{/',/',',)(@>~?.,,';,';';';';"";,.,/./,';.][]{{}}'\']]..'./.,/><<;'';[[==c--##!!:A./,/.,;'][[>?.;'n;.[][''[']y][.//.<<o<>[^^';.u.,'/';;\]['./H,//E++.A,'.,';R';[][..,/.M/,)=E''.//./.,';'./.,>::"<:*'[--=>?~<<';,';$/,';,;.'.

the red is far too deafening -
shut palms around my ears
and yet the world is on screaming fire.
my finger joints crack in my eardrums
while the sunflowers roll in the mud.
firecracker red; fire engine red
took a nap in a sack,
the sun never goes away.

if i may i would turn to pray
to a man up in city hall
where the crowds prey,

i'm asking for a bellyache from hunger,
a shadow to leave my body -
not quite the youthful sunshine
with flaming ash in the air.

please be quiet - you're neither
the hysterical patient, nor
one who needs the normalising
medicine - you would not wish.
it is growing on me, much like
a generous parasite.

Are there people
Without voices in their heads?
Monsters tormenting and
Demons taunting them?
Because I’ve lived my entire life
Fighting for my sanity
My grip on reality
Desperately trying to hear my own voice
In all of the chaos
This is just how I am
It’s how I live
And it astounds me
That anyone could be different

They played around the yard
Orange, Brown, Green, to each its own ray
Left and right they went
It's like they knew the way
For a moment, they weren't just leaves
Anymore
They were her kids, with their loud noises that she could hear no more
With their bright eyes and even louder smiles.
A tear fell down her cheek
For those leaves, flew away.

The echo of a hollow space
strained against my head
An empty cry of deception
and pain inside my mind

Of words not said
Of tears not cried

My fears ****** inside
my broken heart
Strong winds eroded my will
with no mercy

There was no clear path
There was no way out

But when all seemed lost
when all the roads had closed
and my eyes could no longer cry
I heard a sound in the distance

Like thunder

It mended a bleeding soul
healed a broken heart
awoke a dormant warrior

The tender noise
this gracious voice
told me
I am me



-
Written by CZ
Edited and Revised by Aleksander Mielnikow (Alek the Poet)

a bird born in the city
may not know of the forest.
a bird born within the concrete jungle
may not know, but they share emptiness.

a bird born in the city
may have its belly swell.
a bird born in the crossroads and high towers
may feast forever and never fill.

a bird born in the city
may call it a home.
a bird born amongst alleys and avenues
may sing, but often crows.

a bird born in the city,
flies with wings far from what is known.

No matter the clap that may fall
           before the thunder all
is but static vocalization

brought on by a contraption
               of air that after its initial

                                            breath


golds nothing more than a breeze.


And although it may seem loud at the time,
                 its just posturing to spread fear..  

but once the  air dissipates it nothing more
                     than what was heard large amounts



of condensed air... that was meant to scare...
  

               But in reality it learnt us to understand that
even though noises are loud there's an explanation

              that it was just meant to scare and in reality
once you learn the truth.
                  Your free to understand that everything
                              is an illusion, till you understand



                          the truth behind the noise of lies.

Judges are shortsighted now.
After all, the measure of all sounds.
There's no scarier punishment,
Than dead silence.

There is no worse crime,
Than monotonous singing.
There's metal in the voice –
Means more adult became.

Hear the buzz of the drill –
So in the apartment the cracks.
The intercom is ringing –
In the house of a possible shakedown.

Boards creak in the floor –
Nerves are jangling.
The spoon clinked in the saucer –
Everyone's laughing at you.