My friends say I’m lucky,
I’m not even lucky in the slightest for anything.
if I was lucky the universe would of helped a girl out by now.

If I was lucky I’d have the guy of my dreams
If I was lucky I wouldn’t think about dying alone.
If I was lucky I wouldn’t cry myself to sleep.
If I was lucky so lucky  I’d have the biggest smile.
But I’m not so lucky I can’t even function tell people how they make
Me feel

i so thank the hands that crafted
the masterpiece that is you
and the red strings of our fate
that has brought us together

verily as i sit here
an exercise in automatic writing
in the vain of all those dada artists before me
i sit
and compose
and i wonder
oh how lucky i am
that amongst the marvel of the present
amidst the bone and sinew of my hand
i possess still the ability to type
and to see the beauty
in the real and in the unreal
like those many in my past
oh how lucky i am
and i wonder
just how many before me have loved
in that same way that only i
have loved
loved the feeling of fingers and keyboards
and of cookies in my mouth
and of music in my ears
oh how lucky i am
to be in love
with a woman
a woman as real as me and you
and although she is not here
with me
in this moment
she exists as i imagine her
like the fleeting image of a siren in the sea spray
and i write
oh how lucky i am
and i gaze past my bare legs onto the floor
the floor of my room and i wonder
oh how lucky i am
oh how lucky i am
in love with the image of a coke can
like so many andy warhols before me
and i stare into his sunglasses
on the poster next to my bed
that i got at the art institute of chicago
and i wonder
oh how lucky i am

the sky is clear— i go on about my day
as i pass the crystal roads
i saw a feline; astray
i go up to the cat and ask them
“is there anything worth it, my friend?”
hoping for a response, but to no avail
i leave the feline alone and go on about my day
the moon has risen— i prepare to sleep
suddenly i remember the cat on the street
i walk outside and see fireflies
i hear them echo through my ear
looking for the cat, i cannot see but hear
“meow” it calls me, as i walk towards the direction
only could i have noticed i was lost in the dark alley
but the cat i finally found, he was black and round
and then it tells me “there is always something
worth it, even when it’s blurry”

apart from the sadness
i consider myself lucky
to be surrounded by people
that i love so dearly
a blessing that cannot be
taken away from me

A wheel inside my heart spinning so fast it makes me dizzy
And the farther away he gets
The faster it spins
As if there is an invisible chord un-reeling from it
Stretching the distance between us
A real connection
I dont know what i would do
If the chord ever snaps

I am in pain...
         My body aches;
                      I am lonely,
                            My world is dark;
I lost my hope...
        I am unlucky;
               I am useless...
                         My heart is broken;
Words of failures,
         Words of ill fate,
                 Words of fears...
                         Never change.
Change your fate ;
          Everything depends on you.