So often I feel that I do not exist
And I have wondered what it would be like
to allow myself to
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Just­ outside your field of vision
Blending in with the nothingness
that borders the outskirts
of your periphery
I want to be where I am not
Exist in liminal space
in emptiness
as nothing…
Broken charcoal
pencils and crayons
are all just as useful broken
as they are whole
A broken mirror
offers you your own reflection
fractured
warped
but it is still you
reflected

If I sit to still I become numb
but if I move, I fall

Im stuck in a liminal space
an eternal liminal space

I dont know what comes next
Or if even there is a next

Its as though I'm in a waiting room doctor
A waiting room where the doctor will never shop up

save face and leave
hold your quiet
like a secret
before thunder

leave the wound
mark the trail of my passing
reminiscent —
that we do for love
that we do for vengeance

you forgot, my dear
to **** you aim
for the heart

what is the blurry
between the joy and the blues,
we are daffodils flying in the wind
one moment
butterflies falling in the rain
another?

i am overzealous and underwhelming. i say somethings and i regret them. i say nothings and i wish i hadn't. i am weighted and unbalanced. i place value where i think it belongs. i lean heavy into things for too long. i am uncertain and so sure. i run out of thoughts before my heart runs out of feelings. my thoughts run over and overwhelm my heart. i am liminal and concrete. im incomplete but hoping i could be.

walk, keep walking
don't stop, don't turn around
look forwards for the possible lives
that you could live
and pay homage to your old self.

run, keep running
don't hesitate, don't turn back
look ahead for more and more
that you could have
that you could be.

sing, don't stop singing
don't be sad, don't turn all mellow
look around for your own rhythm
that could serenade your soul
and make you whole again.