While flying in the sky A falcon played I spy With his eagle eye He spied a little mole Crawling out a hole Swooping to the ground He hardly made a sound To cause a ripple in the day But he stole the mole away.
A fine young guy by the name of Mike Used to peddle a butchers bike If you needed a tasty treat Mike turned up with a basket of meat And if you fancied a bacon roll Or a bowl of toad in the hole Mike delivered around the clock So it all came as quite a shock When he said he'd enough And he was thinking of doing other stuff Standing there with hands on hips He handed in his trouser clips "I'm moving on to pastures new And going to work for Deliveroo" The butcher's wife couldn't believe her ears And burst out into floods of tears "What would it take to make you stay?" "Any price I'd gladly pay?" The butcher was surprised at this And said "Bridget are you *******?" But Bridget only had eyes for Mike And the pair sped off on the butchers bike.
Jack and Jill Crept up the stairs At their auntie Claire's Jill came down In a floral dressing gown And a pair of purple flairs Jack stayed up In the shower For more than half an hour When he came down Dressed as a clown He was a lover with flower power.
Daniela Duff Was in the buff That day the milkman came He winked and said he liked her name But she knew his game He was her bit of rough And though she thought it was a bad habit He went at it like a rabid rabbit Also he gave her free milk and other dairy stuff.
Lisa and Sue had nothing to do So they drank a bottle of pop They'd bought in a funny wee shop But it was 40% proof And they climbed on the roof Singing a happy song Wearing only a thong And that's were it all went wrong They were taken away And made to stay In a cell all of their own With nothing to wear Except body hair And a bar of toblerone