Amorousness runs

dry and all your happiness --


slips through your fingers.

i sit on a friends couch,
and listen to stories of all of the people in their life.

all of the good and all of the bad.

then i’ll tell them about
all of my good and all of my bad.

shedding and letting go
of all of the things.

letting them slip
in between
the cushions of the couch.

this is how we make the world feel lighter.

All the ways my heart broke,
in the time that I was yours.
With every fracture of my soul,
my memory obscures.
As I sit beside you now,
in this empty room.
I realize that I am done.
But do you feel it too?
It is a heavy feeling,
deep inside my chest,
sinking down to fill the void,
and giving me no rest.
You say that you won't lose me,
but I fear that it's to late.
Cuz it was only after I walked away,
that you begged for me to stay.
I am done with cheaters,
So just stop acting like you're hurt
Its getting to be ridiculous
Remember you left me first.
You made that choice to walk away,
you chose her not me.
So now you can live with what you've done,
You got your wish,
                                     you're free.

Closure
Is an illusion
Science shows us
Life is constantly
In flux

Cant keep waiting
On a certain moment, event,
Or epiphany
To button up our suffering
In a neat little package

We've hung on to this hope of
AFTER
Only "AFTER" is when I'll be healed
Enduring days won't be devastating
And suddenly I'll be this beacon
Of strength, I'll be able to endure anything

In truth,
Grief's a heartache
That never really goes away
The brain starts to play
With what's "fact"and whats "fake"

If this is the way
Then where am I going?

I told you who I see,
Because im done blaming me,
And you choose to walk away,
Didn't even tried to stay,
Easy to brush away,
Cause you dont care anyway...

I want to unfold,
Stand and raise up
I'll stretch so far,
I'll touch the moon and sun.

Every star will fall,
Crashing through me
I'll never collapse again
I'll never feel the burning left by shame.

I'll expand into space's darkness
I'll know just how everything's connected
and feel I'm home once more,
and never hide my own galaxies.

I'll become space dust.

I can feel my body breaking
in the tiredness of my bones
I can feel my body breaking
in the heaviness of my clothes

I can feel myself letting go
of what I used to dream
I can feel myself letting go
as the apathy rises around me

I can feel my mind shattering
as he tells me what he thinks
I can feel my mind shattering
as our friendship starts to sink

I can feel so much
but I still don't seem to care
I can feel so much
in the distance that is there

I can't let myself feel this way
in the long-range
I can't let myself feel this way
it's time to make some change