Beauty is she
The one who holds my heart
It is with her
That I do not wish to part

She left flowers on the inside
Put oxygen in my lungs
Gave me a forever
Of intertwined tongues

She painted my future
Beginning to end
Starting with the broken past
She chose to amend

So as long as she loves me
The flowers will stay
And the oxygen in my lungs
Never will stray

I know you're lonely and tired of being by yourself. You just want someone to give you attention and at this point you are taking whatever you can get. But **** I hope you wait for him. Wait for the boy that doesn't think he deserves a girl as good as you. Wait for the boy who remembers little things you told him during late night conversations. Wait for the boy who knows that you prefer juice boxes to bags and chicken strips to burgers. Wait for the guy who will drive you around with one hand on the steering wheel and the other in your hand. Wait for the guy who will listen to a song on the radio he doesn't even know just so he can listen to you sing along to it. Wait for the guy who's going to treat you like his princess. Don't give pieces of your heart away to everyone who comes walking your way, you deserve so much more.

Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding. It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self. Therefore, trust the physician and drink his remedy in silence and tranquility." - Khalil Gibran

That quote inspired what I wrote because pain is a constant in this cruel world
And in all reality our pain is inspired by the struggles we've gone through, so it may not be easy but to medicate and starting the process of healing is on you.  Others may have caused what you're going through but it's up to you to make it better, because even if it's raining now there's always a chance for better weather

some of us wait forever for 'better'
it has been promised to us so many times like a sweet, sweet lie
just hold on longer,
a little bit longer
(you can't get better if you don't want to)
do you know how badly i want to?
but i can't sit here and wait forever for 'better'
i don't have forever
i'm racing the clock for the day when i will no longer be afraid
when i give up on 'better'

then i will truly be better

so much drama
so much negativity
sadness everywhere
and I stand optimistic

"look at the lid of your cup, there's SO much lipstick on there." You pointed this out a few times to me. What did I do? Sat there embarrassed each time and tried to sheepishly rub the red substance off. It was small things like this, feeling like I somehow let you down-that scared me the most. Little did I know, I had way more to fear. Man, were you good at wiping things off as if they never existed. I should have just handed you my coffee cups and let you wipe off the stains because you are great at hiding the evidence of anything existing at all. My heart aches at the thought of you detoxing your body from my kisses. You wiped away the feeling of my head on your chest, my lips on yours, & the happiness you felt when I called you my babe. And now November has came and gone and I'm still stuck in October with you before you destructed us. "This doesn't have to be for good and I don't even want it to be for good." It's as though everything, your words, your promises, your dignity, have been stolen from you. You gave me the chance to run yet tried holding on to me to ultimately decide you wanted her, not me. WHAT DID I DO WRONG? I'm so tired of thinking it's me but the irritation and bitterness I feel is sickening. Now December has arrived and you're so far gone it frightens me.
You were supposed to stick around.

1, 2, 3...
7, 8, 9...
11, 12, 13...
17, 18, 19...

Still no one stops,
Tears flows forever it seems.
As the time stops,
So does my heart.

I send my angels to protect you,
I send them to save you.
I want you to be forever mine,
I want your love to be mine.

Two woman stop in there day,
To make sure that I'm okay.
I cry as I tell them no,
I told them how you tried to go.

They wait and watch,
To make sure I don't end the same.
I never knew I could feel so much pain.

I love you with all my heart.
Stay forever beside me, my Wolfie.

1, 2, 3...
7,8,9...
11,12,13...
17, 18, 19...

One more I'll be on the floor,
More pain, soon peace.
Soon I'll be closing the door,
I want you back to me.

Pill by pill,
I end my will.
Pill by pill,
I soon will ****.

I close my eyes and wait for death,
Soon he lingers over me.
"Why my child you wish for me?"
I reach for his hand,
But he pulls it away.

"Child of mine, why do you cry?
'Child of mine, don't you love?
'Child of mine, won't you be missed?
'Child of mine, why do you cry?"

"Death take me now,
'Free my soul
'Death take me now
'Finish my goal"

"It's not your time,
Just wait and see,
Someday you will be
Exactly who you wish to be."

I followed the light
At the end of the tunnel.
He led me here,
To this place.

I followed the light
At the end of the tunnel.
He promised to show me
God's grace.

I followed the light
At the end of the tunnel
Not knowing just what
I would find.

I followed the light
At the end of the tunnel
To leave all the
Dark days behind.

I followed the light
At the end of the tunnel
And now I'm here
With you.

I followed the light
At the end of the tunnel
But I'm not sure
What to do.

You followed the light
At the end of the tunnel.
He led you here,
To this place.

You followed the light
At the end of the tunnel.
Did you ever receive
God's grace?

We followed the light
At the end of the tunnel
But he didn't lead
Us astray.

We followed the light
At the end of the tunnel.
So at the end of the tunnel
We'll stay.