I know you’re up thinking about the past and…
frankly i can’t blame you,
the past is where you run to incase you feel alone in your bedroom
and feeling alone is what you’re into
you’re attracted to the pity people gave you
for feeling differently in pains that harbored you,
it hurts but its true, I see you listen to the things you know hurt you
and you think you’re haunted by the past
you purposely think so your hurt will resume,
you’re drugged by heartbreak because you've been broken into
but no mater the amount of times you **** you,
you will never end your sorrows
because they’ve become one with you.

Star Shooter

Why, of course why baby, I can see it in your eyes you can’t live without the star in your life
but it passes by, I guess the star shooters aren’t aiming for your life at this time
and time is all you have, you gaze amongst the clouds waiting for their time to flow away
I guess the pictures they create aint something you care for today
you prefer the brink of the night where light is preserved by milky ways and Hercules

you haven’t seen one move yet but you know you will and when you do you’ll move with it til its still
but the star shooters don’t aim for the landfill of broken feels
so you watch space hold the light still like a vase with daffodils
its beauty is sacrificial as the night heals
tell me how it feels as you waste the time that kills

its the pain that drills your mind, so close to the bottom line
I see the picture in your mind, you feel he’s one of a kind
like the pain you agonize will disappear like the summer flies
but his anger flies by you, you can’t accept the fact he’s bad for you
his personality was the way he was issued, like you subscribed to a life that was made for you
he gon' break your heart again and tell you what you need too
you fall into his trap of thinking he’s a good man
let him convince you’re broken and he’s got what makes you whole again
let him change your perception on love between friends and let him get to you at 2am
let his hands push past boundaries you said he would never cross again
then let his body meet yours and let him tell you its out of love and this what it means to be fulfilled again
so you break your morals while he breaks the floor boards, you broke your promise, while his love was anonymous
you threw your self respect out the way, so he could change your for a day
now your days are limited from the moment he took and ran away
you couldn’t ever convince him to stay
now you sit and stare out your window waiting for the stargazing to shoot one your way

but you haven’t seen one yet but you know it will and when you do you’ll move with it til its still
but the star shooters don’t aim for landfills of broken feels
now your light that was once held still is casting shadows of an image you want to feel
tell me how it feels, the time that kills, is the love still real, or is everything you felt like a shattered vase filled with crushed daffodils

If I could buy time, how would you waste mine?
and if my emotions were still alive, would you apologize?
if my trust was never-ending would you push it to the end of the line?
but if white lies were protecting me, why did you use them to hide?
when you broke my heart to heal yours did the satisfaction suffice?
and when you said friends, you meant guys, and by slumperparties you meant one nights?
and one nights all it would take but if I questioned where you were a defense was set in place
speaking as if I wasn’t trusting you enough, like you were behind me every step of the way
and if my love would never die, how long until you appreciate mine?

We fight often but no fight could ever make me speak on you often
but tell me how often I’m wrong because of the way you speak on
I'll never be right in your eyes, you’ve never been wrong after all
even after all the drinks and drugs you inhale
can’t you tell the tale the holds you stale  
you fall and fail and I would never tell
but you lack compassion, and you find ways to make you matter again
so you blame me for the things you did, and claim you never did it
like our secrets fell out of your pocket and dropped into someones hands
I guess my image never mattered let alone who we were.
I tried to keep that safe but your emotions were what mattered
I tried to run free but I believed the lies you told me
letting go should be so simple but we made it complex
because if the pain is real why should we be forced to come back again
so why is broken love, considered real love to the those who aren't in it?

They say time heals so if I could I'd buy all the time there was
not to extend what we had but to separate what we were
I used to be who you wanted me to be
I'm happy now I can be who I deserve to be.
me
Questions to you, for me

Isaiah you are such a joy. I don't think that I've ever met anyone so happy. Even when you cry you try to smile. You are so innocent and I love that.
You see only the good in everyone.
I can't believe that you belong to me and there is not one mean bone in your body. How did this happen? We can't always understand how our babies become so much better than we are. We can just thank Jehovah that it is so. Your Lovey loves you to the moon and back.
My first grandbaby and first grandson.
I love you with all of my being. You are my sun, moon and stars. Your knowledge for technology is beyond believable. My Izzy baby I look forward to seeing the amazing little person you become.

Guarding the heart. For everything you do flows from it.
Looking forward, I will never look away. I can only move.
Correction is all I have. Wisdom is who I seek.
Your face is the greatest splendor there is.
Messiah, your eyes are upon me. Your love constrains me.
I may be distressed, but I am not fearful.
He is my fear, he is my only astonishment.
It's inevitable, I will always love you.
Woe is me if I did not have salvation. I am a person with impure lips.
I will plead with your face to the cries.
Stop trusting in mere humans, who have but a breath in their nostrils. Why hold them in esteem?