Intrinsically introverted,
   inherently coping with the pressure to understand- distraught or in
       thought?
Multiple factors racing
  call them thoughts,
    become one, but which one?
One will grow symphonies to hurry sunshine under moonlight,
   the other grow vivid distortions of a reality visible only to dreams
Buy low, sell high
   observe potential and sign off on its rights
Sound choices bounded by the stigma placed on creativity,
   choose the other- create the destructive blossoming of blue flowers
        deviant and bold
Fallacies are the true illusions,
   keep on with the mind you feed

arms and legs bound
trapped in a pine box
gasping for air
a feeling that chokes my gut
when a moment of solitude
escapes me

A collection of voices fill the air
Soft and loud always there
A sound of comfort, a warm blanket
I watch tucked in place
With cold glass pressed on my skin
My warmth I feel from the love I observe
A fly on the wall
In love with their world
But detached from their world
The light bounces between their eyes when their tongues
Take turns moving fast and slow soft and loud
An orchestra moving between cacophonous noise
A blend of thundering bass
Soft flutes and piercing piccolos
But amongst those scattered notes
A beautiful sound a harmonious pitch
Drifting like a ghost between planes
Appearing and disappearing like the brush of wind on wintered branches
Moments where a common humanity touches kindred souls
To produce a genuine moment among weathered conversations
Moments I observe and let my cheeks tug
a faint crescent upon a face accustomed to frowns.
How I relish those moments
I wish to join their symphony
To play a trumpet, a violin
To produce noise in a beautiful dance
Yet a dance is fluid
One step in one moment
A fly cannot participate in orchestras
I don't know the notes
I cannot fade into sound as it condenses to mist
I can only observe and sit in silence on the wall
Watching the crescendo of nature's display
How I've fallen for you
How I long for you
How I love you
Humanity

I'd prefer 8 hours with myself
than 8 minutes with them,
I should be happy but I'm happy on my own
I should be laughing but I am joy when I'm alone
is this temporary
or permanent?
I'm scared, someone hold me,please,
tightly, untill I can't breathe

someone help me,please
tighten the grip
make me believe
make me trust in me
make me true
make me feel truly free.

Three's a crowd but this is way too much
It's too loud, inside voice is enough
The drinks stopped working
The chitchat got annoying
Now I'm trying to leave
It's getting hard to breathe
Not enough walls in this house
Not enough cheese for this mouse
All these noises I can't block out
Right now I wish I was knocked out

I forgot what I came for
Am I still on the same floor?
Tried to take it slow
Now I just wanna go
But it's still too soon
Room full of unpopped balloons

The words I speak sound foreign to my ears
as I address strangers that I've known for years.
We're engaged in simple, common talk.
How I can't wait for it to stop!
It has been too much I need time to myself,
to disperse the energies of a negative self.
For one whole week I've continued to converse
and it's all sounding a bit rehearsed.
Conversation smothers me like a pillow
calling me to a sleep that's eternal.
I need to find a way to discharge
this exhaustion that stalks me and recharge.

Why be loud
When you can sit silent
Why go out
When you can stay hidden
Why be awake
When you can dream.