am I you
what am I without you
its not your fault
don’t cry for me
don’t confuse me
I love you
don’t leave me
don’t have *** like it's
nothing
don’t look at her naked body
with the same eyes that you
looked upon mine
don’t let me breathe a life saving breath
while you’re

in
her

let me wallow in saturated agony
let me be in pain
let me feel the extent of my own emotions
and eventually
for a bee that carries three times its weight isn’t meant to last
let me go into that valley of death
that idyll
that probable hell
where I may but suffer the more,
take me there.

give me a smallest crumb more
let me lick your fingers
I must see if I could still summon that sweet syrup love
that burns as it exits
my bellybutton

let it then lapse away
so I may forget
and when he finds his way
back to my dirt trail I'll never stop walking
I will pick him up and nourish his soul with my own
so his stomach fills
and he is more whole

and I am more hole

It’s 2 am
And you stared outside the window
Looking at the vastness of nothing
How lights touched other lights
And how this darkness covers us all
It’s when you will realize
One could not keep secrets that long
It will have holes
It will leak through gaps
And spaces
It would make you feel incomplete
And a complete mess
Because the things you can hide from others
Are the things you can never hide from yourself
Because when it’s 2 am
And you’re staring at the vastness of nothing
You can only feel yourself
And you don’t want to wake up from a dream
A beautiful dream that is a nightmare
When it hits 3 am.

When I look at him I see the hate in my eyes
The jealous rage that lives in my heart
Is the very thing that now tears me apart
Not I felt miserable
Every time I see him with someone
Later days felt incomplete
Feeling my mixed emotions
Felt my heart beats

I don't have friends
I'm not social.
But I do have him,
He's my best friend.
And he's the only one I need.
I feel whole when I'm with him,
When he's not with me...
It feels like I've been ripped in half.

A part of me is on a street corner and the other half is dropped into an upside down fishbowl.

Trapped.

While my troubles swim around me.
Forcing me to hold my breath and watch them.
Trying to call for help is inevitable,
No one can hear over the sound of the gurgling water.

The half on the street corner is waiting for a bus that'll never come.
While rain pours with no umbrella.

But together it's better than happiness and I don't feel so...

Incomplete.

I seem to be having
An existential crisis
I feel as though
I am lost
Not physically --But rather
Emotionally--
I am not whole
Rather, pieces of me
Are missing
Why? Well--because
I gave them all away
To past lovers
Or partners--
Look!
He has a piece
And so does she
And **** so do they
In the corner
All of you
You have pieces of me,
I need them back!!
I'm not me
Without them
Oh--- but there aren't refunds
On souls, or love, or time--
They're gifts
And I gave most of mine
Away
And now---I'm empty
I'm lost, I'm incomplete
Oh god--
I have no
Identity