When I was young
I was scared of ghosts,
Now I greet them every night
in the mirror

I don't mean to tile a question
But that's where I'm at
...
I don't know any further than that

©2025

I kept thinking you’d soften
if I stayed quiet enough,
if I showed you what gentleness and love looked like,
that you might try it on.

But you never changed.
You never even blinked.
And I kept bleeding
thinking it was part of love.

I wanted you to be better.
Not for me-
but for you.
But wanting didn’t make you kind.
It only made me blind.

You didn’t hurt me by accident.
That’s just who you are.
And I’ve spent too long
writing apologies in my own pain
for expecting more.

So I’ll stop pretending
there’s a softer version of you
waiting just around the corner,
just to make things a little easier.

It should have never been a goodbye.

A 'see you later' or maybe even that of a 'see you soon' would have been nice to hear..

Though we know i'm filthy, I am nothing more than what they say about me.
A "Weak link" a "Useless dime"

Yet again I keep thinking back to you, My sweet Valentine..
—the one whom had been more than made to be mine, the one I shall tear my heart out from its chest for even a moment equity. (so to speak)

It hurts me on the inside. the more I think, the more I ponder senselessly.
My darling, my flame within the darkness of night: my new chance to embrace life.

You say you love me, yet I find myself being unable to believe you my dear.
Quite the blasphemy coming from the tongue from one as lowly and vile, once again. A unremovable stain from within mothers new carpet.

—can you love me like I love you? Is it so much to yearn for??
Even if it can be too much to requite from you, can you do it anyway???

I'm getting tired of this. The little charade that leaves the both of us staring into the darkness of night, the prolonged (the longing) gazes with those eyes.

Those eyes with that gaze whom threatens to envelop my entire being, the same eyes that slowly burn me from the inside.

One little astronaut build a spaceship  of junkyard parts and wielded up the mountainside and tried to get the thing to fly looking through his telescope of cardboard and a paper hole and hoping soon to fly even though he hasn't even lived
But the ship was build real bad and rolled down the mountain slideing down the mountainside landing into the ocean's tide  
But the pilot had to face I'm floating in outer space I'm further than I was before heading to the ocean floor now I'm in the furthest place possible from outer space and the one I love I guess it's a poetic way to die ironic I can't even cry I'm surrounded by salt water so why even bother trying to fall in love with you feels like getting hit in the back of the neck with the wiffle bat full of stars and I got scars to prove it under my hands and over My heart