Does a weathered heart yearn to be replenished?
Or is it too broken to tick or be tickled by hope?
Do the tears of time drip drop down,
until drip by drip the drops extinguish the warmth
that is pushed from the inside out
by the crisp glow that curls smooth paper
to a glow red feather?

Why does every second second
Pass faster than the first?
So the thirst for the
third, fourth and fifth to slow
becomes an accelerating threat
to the volume of seconds left to pour.

Why is it
that the steady heart beat momentum of time
is distorted by the fluctuating force of perception?
Fluctuating the feel of the pulsating tick tock
of the clock.

How come while time carries on unaware of the damage it causes
we cause the problems
with our endless trek down a trail for questions and answers
and blame time for not stopping to less us do this

Crying and blind, blinking in the dark
We can’t see a thing, we can’t tell
If we’re flying or falling or sinking in the dark
The only thing that is with us
Is the pulsating, unsteady tick tock
Inside us in the dark.

You can feel it,
In the voices of men on
phones in bars
Spitting apologies turned
recriminations.
You can feel it,
In the scratching of strings
on the guitar
of an inmate and the eyes that
stare in the face of disinheritance.
You can feel it,
In the clasp of the couple
at the beginning or the end
In bed in the dark
in a fleshy shell.
You can feel it,
In  the ink on a page
scribbled in rage
that goes nowhere
but leaves you different.
You can feel it,
In screams of a soldier
turned human through pain
calling 'mum!' or 'god!'
dying abandoned .
You can feel it,
In the cries of a child
who's met unfairness
and not learned to swallow the blades
so throws them out in tears.
You can feel it,
In goodbyes that are
lost for words
but language cannot express.
You can feel it,
In the the stretched out fingers
of those trying to reach
a hand or hate or love or life.
You can feel it,
In watching another slip
and slide away
and flail their useless limbs.
You can feel it,
As the morning rain
hits your hand
and cleanses the skin on your knuckle.

You can feel it sting
You can feel it sting
Let it sink in
and feel it.

a tree so strong
never moving
stand your ground
though confusing
to love through the night
though you can't see
to trust with blind faith
this could never be me
enduring through all
with hope so vast
loving all the while
I give hope to those steadfast

He sits on the carousel wheel,
her lover neglectful-
looks over the night as the neon illuminates the shiny people.
He sits on the carousel wheel
and loves to get stuck at the top
so he may contemplate jumping,
so to contemplate swinging with madness
from one
cart
to
another
and then
safely
to the
cart that
holds her. Hero, him.
He looks over the crowd as they swish around him-
sway around him
moving by him as if they were dancing to a song in his head
but he is not dancing.
He's looking for her.
He pops several balloons with a fiery dart
walks away from the girl with the silken stockings held to her
thigh by violet bow...a violent blow to his lustful ways, he looks firmly down
to the dirt on his boots, kicks rocks, kicks air.
Stops at the man who swallows fire from a stick,
"answer me, answer me"-
the man spits ember lies.
He's looking for her in each clown
pulling their make up down with his finger
and it looks like they're crying
so he can't really know
if it is her he has found?
Oh neglectful lover.
He busies himself by winning a prize
for his beloved, his lost
A prize- his reward for believing in true love.
He busies himself, knocks down milk bottles-
and punches the punching bags
insults the slow and disgusted carnie hags,
He moves from gate to gate
and it feels more like Hades
inside
where he's lost her
so he's been lost.
When he's lost her he's scared
that she will not feel, lost but found.
And he will not feel found-
but destroyed.
Teacups to twirl around
the dance he will swirl her around to
the day that he marries her,
if he can find her,
nay- when he can find her...
he'll put her in the teacup ride and
never let the spinning stop.
He'll fill her life with lights and sounds
and cotton candy
and he'll marry her he will
right on the tiptop
of the ferris wheel
where he sits looking round.

sahn 10/19/14

She glistens beautifully on the river night
With blurred sparkles yet glinting
She waited so long for her daylight
But He only came when she’s sleeping

He shines brightly with infinite fervor
Giving life to the ones in pain
He knew it’s impossible for them to sustain
To see her once he’d always hoped for

They always knew it was unviable
But their love bestows hope on earth
Their curse afflicted despite their denial
Yet they still believe in their oath

They’re inclined to do their utmost
Knowing everything will eventually be in tarnish
Not remorseful to what they lost
Until they prevail on what they wished

They finally met from time to time
Only to be torn apart again & again
Yet they cherished their eclipse to rhyme
**For the love they always believed in.

Tick,
The sound of a keyboard being abused by angry fingertips.
Tick,
Subtle sounds of the air conditioner creating frigid conditions.
Tick,
Fluorescent lights fill the room, revealing nothing but normality.
Tick,
Bashing my brain with stupid questions, clingining onto sanity for dear life.
Tick,
A phone rings, a melancholy mind state is to follow.
Tick,
Tick,
Tick....
****, at least I get paid.

I can rest assured tonight—
I know I am secure;
Even when all others fight,
I know I shall endure.