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Francis Sep 2016
I had seen a woman that I once knew.
She shattered my heart,
Leaving me cold and blue.
Although it was yesterday since I last cried,
It has been a decade since she had died.

Sanity abandoned my life,
The minute I asked her to be my wife.
Once she fell for a new man,
I then became her biggest fan.

Photography became a hobby of mine.
Oh how her eyes were beautiful when they shined,
In the lenses of my polaroid.
It was my heart she viciously destroyed.

Her lips pressed passionately on her new love's,
As if they were two white Turtle Doves.
He pulled her clothes off,
One by one.
In my car I sat,
Loading my gun.

The smell of fear was loud,
In the atmosphere gliding in a crowd,
Of particles kissing spatters of blood.
Her screams could wake the neighborhood.

On this day I weep in pain,
As I recall an abundance of blood to drain.
Though being reminded is not hard,
Her apparition is not far.

In cold sweats I awake at night.
My sanity tender as it builds a fright.
This is no hallucination,
She's here with me,
Causing fear to flow through my still body.

Creeping towards my king sized bed,
Her eyes shined bright blood red.
She opens her mouth so bold and wide,
To remind me that I am why she died.

Sarah Castle, please be kind.
Your beauty is rare.
It can cure the blind.
But how sinister you seem tonight,
I don't appreciate this uncomfortable fright.

Screaming loud,
So ominously and cold.
Your smell is like the smell of mold,
Yet beauty is still a quality.

Horrific and beautiful.
Deadly and lovely,
I remember you just as one.
Now you come to visit me,
Holding my loaded gun.

The laughter you create,
As I cry and sway about.
I have soiled my underpants,
As you hover and shout.

******! ******!
You so boldly scream at me,
I apologize for my actions,
You will always be my lovely.

Farewell sweet Sarah.
I'll see you in my dreams.
Just please do me a kindness,
And cease those horrifying screams.
Name pronounced "Kay-Sull" and I don't know where I heard this name, but it appeared a dream I had. This beautiful girl whom I had never seen before in the real world, appeared quite often in some dreams I had and her name was Sarah Castle. I decided she was too perfect to pass up an opprotunity to write about, so I came up with this.
Francis Sep 2016
Starting with a sudden thought,
Which then leads to rapid negative emotions.
The heart beats as fast as a jackhammer,
my right leg mimics the motion.

A tight and sharp sensation is felt in my lungs,
With hyperventilation to follow.
My mind races like a stallion.
The feeling of anxiety is at play.

Am I going to die?
Will I experience the worst imaginable?
Is my nausea leading to a sea of bile on the floor?
Here comes my loss of balance.

As my hands start to shake,
My legs continuing to tap,
I pray for the lord to give me a break.
I fail to sleep.
I refuse to take a nap.

The subconscious is strong.
Too strong to bare.
The flesh is weak.
Weak as the mind it protects.

A little pill to sedate the patient,
A pill that's small and yellow.
With my antispasmodics adjacent,
These pills aim to mellow,
The one ailment causing these symptoms.

Anxiety.
Such a fancy word.
A synonym for evil.
They say everybody has anxiety.
But do they understand fully on what happens inside of me?

I will forever be cursed,
With mental instability.
As my mind so ominously bursts,
My thoughts hold me victim to infidelity.
Francis Sep 2016
Insomnia,
Insomnia,
I wish that you would die.
Why is it that you ****** me?
You laugh as you make me cry.

Feelings that help conspire,
My heart to skip a beat.
The pressure of my blood rises higher,
To cure my sadness I continue to eat.

A monster grows inside of me,
His name I do not know.
All of this peculiar controversy,
Conspiracies begin to grow.

Not knowing who or what I am,
I start to lose my head.
While my head forms
it's acidic jam,
It soaks up into my bed.

Deadly forces fight inside,
My brain stops it's function.
Unconventional disfunctions collide,
Like a sentence without conjunction.

Distancing myself from society,
I'll sleep forever lonely.
Friends are like your enemies,
So late to realize they're phony.

Love has been lost,
Some time ago.
I wish I had a companion.
Misery,
Inside of me.
A woman's touch will make,
This loneliness inside of me go.

Questioning the nature of humanity,
I feel I'm betraying the lord.
Constant coexisting insanity,
Starts when one becomes bored.

Boarding up these windows,
The storm rolls in above.
As peers become your hated foes,
Hate transformed from love.

Waking up this very day,
I notice a familiar sensation,
Every dawn is like today,
With no spontaneous creation.

Night comes about,
I fail to sleep,
Instead I start to shout.
Counting sheep,
Is useless,
As my heart fails to grout.

Insomnia,
Insomnia,
Why won't you let me be?
Too many things exhaust my mind.
I'd like to go to sleep.
Francis Sep 2016
A primary source of pain is the truth,
though the truth shall set you free.
An addiction beyond recognition,
there is something dark deep inside me.

Inanimate white evil,
has stolen he who is I.
My soul needs cleansing,
Am I close to where I die?

With knowledge comes wisdom,
and wisdom is beneficial.
But knowledge of this darkness,
The last thing I am is superficial.

Reality is no longer near,
As my sinuses fail to clear.
The darkness was formed by choice,
And to die is what I fear.

As the lights rapidly flicker,
While my mind starts to shut down.
Like a married couple who bickers,
There is no peace,
In my own blood I will drown.

The light calmly dims,
The rhythm of the monitor straightens,
And a continuous beeping noise trims,
The sound of silence in the room.

In the name of the father, the son and the holy ghost,
Whoever snorted the fastest got the most.
But was it an escape from reality?
Or reality escaping from me,
I am now forever gone,
But the darkness will linger over my family.
Not my favorite but...
Francis Sep 2016
Fixated on the idea of stillness,
While my existence ceases to stand still.
Four past a dozen years of sanity,
but insanity becomes my will.
Is it faith that lyes within?
Or is it time to turn out the light?

Impervious to fulfillment,
Emulating a personality I could only dream of.
The mask became too tight,
and the match eventually burnt out.

Uncontrollable perturbation seemed,
Like a pit that had no bottom.
With emotional *******,
letting it escape was difficult.

Fear of judgement,
that comes from the outsider's force.
Smiling at the frowns inside,
denial took its course.
With a heart of gold,
and pride the size of the earth.
This name of mine should live on,
but had already been a memory at birth.

The final sleep could be near,
but the awakening could be so.
It could very well interfere.
Yet it is very well doubtful,
Through my eyes though.

Ashamed of what might come,
if my emotions pilot my soul.
This aircraft is running out of fuel,
and my fear to move on has dilated.

These roots are growing rapidly,
like a **** in the season of the sun.
My emotions are exploding,
Like a bullet escaping a gun.

God forgive this sinner,
Who sins for the worthy of life,
These words are cutting deep,
Deep through me like a knife.
A child at heart,
With a wise tale to tell.
My world is spinning rapidly,
My head is clanging like a bell.

A moral man in a corrupt world,
I portray a shakespearian player.
Soliloquies in character,
But this character is myself,
Myself is he,
The player.

In the final fall of the curtain,
I soon am ready to bow,
The crowed is loudly silent,
it is time to say goodbye now.
Francis Sep 2016
To die in my own arms.
To experience rapture in my world
encompasses a field of hindrance.
Undoubtably failing,
to seek those who comfort me in a world of nonfulfillment.
A confined receptacle of positive emotions
struggling to be kept shut tight,
as I meander the streets of the bold and proper.

Unconventional workings of the mind projected by waves of sound ******,
causes discomfort to those who have listened in company of me.
Notability has been afar,
since I had last possessed it so greatly.
I am now the last of what to be known,
as the person I once was to be.

Lust awaits behind a door,
a door that has weakened with seniority.
Love appears to be concealed in fear.
Rejection is relative to love's own emotion.
Lust is what terminates the opportunity of love,
when oral phrasing is miscalculated from it's true meaning.

Never have I been so doltish,
and scatterbrained I seem to be.
Alone I am It seems to me.
Will solitude become my everlasting acquaintance?
It's been surely devoted for quite some time,
although I'd prefer to meet it's demise.

Nevermore I seek to idolize,
such a classification that rebuffs me.
I'll keep to me and one day I shall see,
It is but only me,
who has been faithful to fidelity.
Failure to remain in solidarity any longer,
with thoughts I blindly accept.

Denial will get myself nowhere,
but a premature casket that aimed to be fulfilled by an obsolete version of me.
I have yet to find such love again.
Nostalgia appears to be such a unique function of the memory.

Yet nostalgia for me,
causes misery when reminding me of what I once had, and will forever fail to achieve again.
Two malignant relatives haunt me as I attempt to dream of peace and tranquility.
Malicious enemies such as depression and loneliness will forever cease my ability to dream.

Opposing the peacefulness they provide the nightmare.
But no nightmare is as gruesome or horrific as the constant reminder that,
I am alone,
And I will now know what it's like,
To Die in My Own Arms.
Michael LoMonaco Sep 2016
Insulting acts are evaluated by deadly opinions,
Portraying a picture that hurts dignified views.

Even if the judgement is completely justified,
We should never apply disapproving conclusions.

Forming negligent assessments without all facts,
Existing claims of immorality signifies sentiments.

Let wickedness be judged by a higher power,
Only a righteous God can interpret wisely.

Once we resist the supposition from criticism,
Reasoning of objectivity will inspire civility.
Michael LoMonaco Sep 2016
History of tragedy inflicted scars,
Leading to trauma that injured an era.

Instead of dwelling mostly on missed chances,
Failures were focusing on fueling diligent tactics.

At war versus a devising plan of optimism,
Destiny led to a puzzled quest for results.

Following a directionless map with only roads,
No highways to reach my destination faster.

Becoming lost on many occasions in the street,
Searching for a path that will lead to hopefulness.

The route to contentment did prevail by dignity,
Fighting for the right to happiness that was earned.

Conflicts of destined survival will last for eternity,
Battling the struggles that can ruin stability of bliss.
Airam Aug 2016
I will stay quiet.
I will say no more.
Just there where you left me
Im still here, didnt go.
You breath in, breath out,
My breath is still held,
From that very moment,
Where I was left.
Sun wakes up, falls asleep,
Do you think it misses the moon?
The moment when they meet I will move on,
The moment Sun sees the Moon I will speak, I will respond.
I stay still, keep quiet,
The words are taken away from my lips,
From the moment you left,
The moment your promises were no longer kept.
I stay still, mouth is shut,
Words are taken by the Moon,
It keeps them to speak with the Sun,
When they speak, listen,
They have eternity to talk over,
Spring comes autumn goes,
Decades pass near me,
I still stay still, can you see me?
At the same place same last breath you let me take, before you left.
Day by day, night by night,
I am still there, remaining quiet.
Like waterfall the words remain unspoken kept in a well.
I will remain quiet, till we speak again, from the moment where I didnt breath out.
Wait few hundred years more, till every Star will shine the last words
Till every leaf will whisper you
Every bird will tweet,
Just wait a millennium more,
I will still be there, where you left me.
With broken promises, confused and abandoned, I will remain quiet till the day we speak, the day you will bring me to life again.
Till then. I will stay quiet I will say no more.
Kayla Aug 2016
I miss high school.
Not the overdramatic girl yelling at the top of her lungs.
Not the so-called friends that left me stranded.
Not the hours of homework on something I still don’t understand.
I miss people.
I miss moments.
I miss routine.
I miss him.

- kmh
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