looking at others
didn’t know it bothered

cause when they start to talk
saying things like 'I wish he’d call'

it hurts
I know I can't say that
cause they are just living their life
happy they look
blooming inside

nothing can destroy that
at least that’s how they feel

I should mind my own business
but-
Should I warn them?
cause it's going to be worse
but for some reason they don’t see the curse

give it time
and everything crashes down
just like…
always

Ouroboros lived in a forest,
He could’ve been like anyone before us.
He lived his life filled with pride,
Masking plenty of issues on the inside.
Ouroboros always believed he was in the right,
Despite the many times he was on the wrong side,
He lived his life filled with pride.
A constant cycle,
In the shape of a circle.
He never learned from his mistakes,
He just brushed them off onto another day,
His friends and family wished he would change,
But he remained the same.
Ouroboros lived in a forest,
He convinced himself that it wasn’t due to his poor choices.
He could’ve been like anyone before us,
Poor Ouroboros.
A constant cycle of believing you're constantly in the right,
A never-ending circle consistently spinning because of pride.
Is it worth it to throw everything on the line,
Just because you can’t accept that your side,
Of the issue isn’t the only one on people’s minds?
Poor Ouroboros,
A somber chorus,
And the poor forest can’t ignore his cries.
All this strife due to pride.

TW: mentions of addiction


Addiction is like a game
It make you believe you are in control
“I can stop if I want”
But can you?
Can you get rid of its grasp on you
Its claws will dig in to your skin
Trying to pull you back
You will wither like a flower
And think “just 1 more time”
That 1 more time turns to 9
That 9 turns binding
The bind that will not break
If you don’t stop today
The cycle will repeat tomorrow
Like ring around the Rosie
Around and around
till you collapse
You must break the cycle
Before the cycle breaks you.

lots of leaves and tall trees
a blue house staring over me

a feeling alone, mocking me

orange sky and ease
angst building as the sun deepens

can i ever be set free?

from this cycle that witholds me-
recurring power to negativity and gloom

can positivity really be enough for me?

to keep rising again, through dark space-
only able to rely on me

light in obvious places, scares me
a trick waiting to point and tease

doors that seem to be js a push away-

yet i pull

im all in on the losing side of tug a war
once i fall only i can pick myself back up

fear in things that might not be as they seem
balance is key

lack of hope is what gets me
impending doom within me

romanticizing potential like a love novel-
too good to be true

neglect: a forever question of truth

unrealiable feel of belong-
only love can make me feel so small

1st gust
drowning puddles with chimes
underneath
the hem of a guava tree
when i am robbed
of choruses
sung by the rain

with the coast
comes warm white sands
but never the taste
of salt on the ground
packed in like
grandma’s sweaters
permeates the smell of
freshly cut skin

i am fond
of bruising peaches;
no longer as
youthful as they
used to be.
expired hearts;
they are only fresh
for a week

how do i keep warm
the memory of you?
do i stash it away
in the arms of a girl
ready to be birthed
into a world
too desolate for its own

i watched the hope
crumble before my eyes
a stale concrete prison
i pushed my way out
just to see you
being burned alive
and i could not
weep, nor
could i cry

left me
to die in a moat;
acrylic coffin
meant to be
a gift for someone
happier than me
and watch my
expiration date
at my end, join me

you watched my
petals wither away
robbing me of
that which
i first loved
because i missed
you

i wish
i could
keep you
warm

One beer and then another,
adults standing in a circle;
Life always seemed better.
Sat in the corner with the other kids;
watching how they smile and cheer while they chugged another.
Thought to myself: “When I grow older, I wanna be just like them; smiling and drinking and always happy.”

Time passed and I turned 18.
Had my first beer;
wasn’t as good as it seemed.
It was bitter and sad;
yet the adults always seemed to want another.

Couple years fly by.
Was invited to a party;
seemed like a good time
We adults stand in a circle;
jolly as we talked about our lives.
Beer after beer;
it seemed like a great time.
Yet deep within;
something felt missing.
Smiles and cheers;
yet no one seemed happy.

That’s when i realised.
The beer was bitter;
but not as much as our lives.
We smile and drink;
to feel something—
or at least act like we do.

Out of the corner of my eye,
a kid stares—
with the same glimmer I had in my eyes.

"And it is I
Deciding where & when, if,
¹ You shall go."

"And it is I
Who rows from shore to shore
² Ferrying each passenger."

Sultry summer breeze whispers,
Cools warm skin, carrying floral notes.
The gentle padding of tender soles treading
Plush moist earth. Pulsing planet perceptible,
Seamlessly sending signals as through osmosis
She is ready. Seeded and sprouting with new
Verdant growth. To feed the hungry cycle.
To give fresh inspiration to all creation.

I give too much to everyone else,                                                            ­                    
                                                                ­                                                  
I don't save anything for myself                                                           ­                           
                                     ­                                                                 ­                  
so, I end up empty as a
shell                                                            ­                
                                                                ­                                            
resenting the takers & myself as
well                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                        
I open my mouth the words come
out,                                                             ­       
                                                         ­                                                                 ­
  I need to please, what's that
  about?                                                        ­                    
                                                                ­                                              
When the time comes to do the
deed,                                                            ­    
                                                            ­                                                            
  I'm overwhelmed if I don't meet their
needs                                                  
         ­                                                                 ­                                      
  Why can't I take, why can't I
receive?                                                         ­       
                                                         ­                                                       
Why can't I feel a little
greed?                                                           ­                   
                                                                ­                                                        
I have wants, I have
needs                                                            ­                      
                                                                ­                                                  
Sure there's a reason deep down inside                                                           ­         
                                                       ­                                                         
  some under lying purpose of why I,                                                               ­                                                      
                                                                ­                                                
don't feel I deserve the pleasure                                                         ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                    
of someone who treats me better                                                           ­                                                 
                                                                ­                                            
Maybe I just need to be
needed,                                                          ­        
                                                                ­                                                
that's why the cycle keeps being repeated