long days are becoming more comfortable

things to do

away.... selfish me
let her be
no one to please
enlightenment to seek
dissolution of thought

seeing through the fissures

visiting the empty creeks

totsiens boo

staggering memory

catch a thought to avoid the misery

asmr videos to sleep in tranquility

losing my sense of self

(not all that bad)

inflicted abilities

to see beyond the people that leave

accepting for the ease

aware of the problems and successes that I must seize

what's to replicate?
a feeling I can't forget?

along with trembling thoughts passing through
moments in my blues

with nothing to lose
there's everything to risk

no one beside me on this cruise
no one to take inside of my Louvre

meaning in some coordinates

a place I can't climb out of

adaption to create something in the current situation I'm in

elevating in time

touch the ground in the moment

here like I was before

Like I always will be

Lullaby playing
I can only think things I shouldn't be saying
Like the loss of you that is driving me insane
Alone in the room that was meant for me and you
Never been so distanced from the truth
It was you, the one that made it seem like this experience was eternal youth

(troubled, will you be back soon?)

.....it's this moment that I wish I was immune from this doom that said I couldn't make it past the afternoon

I'm here now

1:30 pm.... a little bit passed afternoon

(Rant)

It’s weird how people who are in charge of influencing our futures grow tired of doing just that, then complain how we lack direction.

I’m calling out the teachers who stoped caring about the complexities each child has in their life, and instead of taking the time to understand and help develop their abilities and talents, they have their students to the bare minimum to make their own jobs easier.

This doesn’t have to be just teachers though, it can be parents too. The ones who never learned to heal themselves so their child grows up in the dark looking up to people who lead them down the wrong path because that’s the only way they can get the love and attention they want.

The night is fruitful
and it stretches on forever
with no light or voice to vie
to me the darkness provides
to me it never lies
my mind becomes calm and agile
like a figure in the caricatures

so I diligently fantasize the time
who speaks to me through the ticking of the old clock
who paints the dusky room with ink that darken every second
who puts a tranquil aura on items that touches my skin
who proudly reveals its presence over every other elements
who is the now, the ever, and the everlasting end

If only your mind were to be sure to exist,
Wouldn't you be destined to be forever lonely ?
Everything you know and learned to love would simply be an extention of your very own consciousness, your psyche,
The fabric of this reality would be nothing but a fantasy,
That of course, might be a wishful thinking to some, however,
With the harsh fate would come a worse realization,
Abandoned, layered upon a dusty tone, the fabric of your mind,
If you then were to suddenly just shut down your conscious,
Even your own reality would cease to exist further,
Such thing could never be, but be sure not to forget,
Everyone lives depending on mostly their knowledge and awareness and we call this " reality ", however,
Both knowledge and awareness are aquivocal,
That means one's reality might be anothers illusion
So how can we really be sure, to exist  ?

~ Umi