no, i'm probably not okay
but does it really matter?
my life is spinning, and
what i was once so sure of
is now a fleeting possibility
and everything else is chaos
i imagine myself in a spiders web
every issue i have is sticky
and connected to the rest
all working in unison to keep me
from passing this test that we call life

I often write to many writing task.
But that's just because I'm trying to mask,
The inside of my inner thoughts.

They come back and forth like the waves to the shore.
It often gets chaotic making it hard to ignore,
The inside of my inner thoughts.

Regularly my head is drooped on my palm.
The hold it has on me, I want it liberated from...

Tobacco and wine
Flowers and pine
Our love was bittersweet
I loved how I hated you
And you hated how you loved me
Together, a chaotic symphony

I can't laugh maniacally
And I can't hurt someone
Without feeling lots of guilt,
I can barely keep a secret
If it's mine and I think it'll hurt someone.

So stamp
"Chaotic Good"
In red on my forehead,
And I'll only do good
If it so suits my moral compass.

But my good involves
Vengeance,
It involves fighting for honor.
It involves putting the care
For the people I love
First and foremost.
***** the idea
That those who attempt
Volatile blackening
Of names
Deserve to be validated
Or made to feel supported,
I'd rather rip them to shreds,
In that righteous way I have about me.

And maybe it's wrong,
But I can't make a plan for world *******,
Because honestly I don't care enough.

And I'd make a terrible villain
For the same reasons I'd make a terrible lawyer,
Because I shake when I'm anxious
And cry when I'm mad.

But at least I know
I wouldn't be able to sit back
And watch the world burn.

Train spotted on ancient rail tracks
Mucks and grants on submerged pasts
Copper and ***** metal poles point
Upwards in heaven above the panelled tops
Price all  the intentional conditioning
A paradise of self sufficiency
A dew of ranting , the metal raiding
Price the substitutional compressions
A timber frame of tunnels
The heightened temperature
Price and tag her beautiful mind
An attachment of glorified plinth
The punch of the chaotic medals
Pride and rearrange her plentiful plight
Show all her cast frame in crimson and greys