water in the desert
fire in the tundra

Trust
unlike anything else that claims to be such

is precious
is rare

So much so that some have
never seen it
never heard it
never experienced it

to them it's myth and fairytale
little more than a half happy lie

Trust
to them that know
It's more fickle than a candle flame
It's more stable than helium

if you have it
treat it as the rare gift it is

if you have it
know that its strength depends on yours

if you have it
know that it has you
if you leave it
know it leaves you.

©Christopher F. Brown 2015

Autumn reminds me
Of your fingers and
The way your hands
Held mine, and it’s
Strange because
Even autumn’s reds
And pinkish browns
Never went together
As well
As you and I
Could’ve done.

The lower back arches
Muscles tangle in with the spine
And intertwining curvature sneaks between vertebras
Creating a vineyard of sweet spirits
That I could drink from the palms of your hands

As though the gentle and rough intentions
Had forever been engraved in a fate
That the universe hadn’t even planned for it
Otherwise the circumstances wouldn’t have been

And so foolish, I looked onward to the lit pavement
Walking between the crowd in hopes that
The grasping of my soul would stop from being tortured
In ways so tender that I wish I could expand in to the millions of atoms I am

Your skin felt like a warm liquid
That washed over your bones structure
Your eyes, those brown eyes
That looked at me with a shine that
I wasn’t sure if everyone else could see
And the light freckles and tinges of skin tone
Pixelated the platform of your body
And I, could look at you forever
Without even thinking twice about tomorrow

Her brown coffee eyes woke up my soul
more than any amount of caffeine could.
Her smile warmed my heart like the sun
when you walk out of the shade on a spring day.
Her mind seemed to make mine whole
even all the parts that never made sense to me.
And I still wonder why I am the one
who gets to look into her brown coffee eyes.

at one point i saw your ghost..
it was your soul..
it made me cry for but a moment..
my light brown eyes formed tear mirrors..
and i prayed that you saw your reflection in them..
even if it was just for a moment..
i still love you...

The day I left you,
I didn't want to drive away.
Part of you was still mine,
And I realize now that it was your heart.
That seems irrelevant now.
Threats are not the way to win me back.
Neither are love letters.
Phone calls.
It is over.
I was so in love with you.
You ****** that up.
I was protecting you, and you repay me with this.
I admit I wanted you back.
Not now.
Maybe one day, that boy with the big brown eyes,
The one I see standing at the alter when I close my eyes,
Maybe one day he will help me get over this hell you put me through.
Love me.
Unlike you.
Maybe I've never met him,
Maybe I have.
I see him though.
We will be happy.
And as for you,
I hope you realize I did everything I could to help you,
I left when I didn't want to.
You chose to break me.
Your mistake.
I'm moving on.
To find my brown eyes,
And wash away your big blues.

When white men spit hatred through spiteful lips,
what will you do? Will you raise your fists?
When a white man kills a black teen without blinking,
will you turn from protests to riots without even thinking.
You want to prove something?
Prove that there is nothing a white man could do to break the black community.
Show that you will never fight fire with fire. Keep MLK alive, let him live in your city.
Beat hatred unconscious with love, and drown it in peaceful protest.
For, Mike Brown's death was only a test.