I am amazed
        but I know not why (knowing me)
how hurt closes me off
sews me up
amputates my heart
from people I’ve loved.

It seems I cannot get by
the rage she vomited on me
what she called me
her shocking condemnations.

Rage cuts deep
wounds heal slow
if at all.

Then I find out how she felt hurt and betrayed
when I changed and detoured
        because someone betrayed me.

But I am glad for those detours
where I discovered other worlds
and became more than I was.

I am amazed
       but I know not why (knowing me)
how hurt can remake
and occasion my transformation,
how the bad can become the good
        If I am patient enough
        and work hard enough
        to find
        or make
        cracks in that wall.

Every day, I am convinced I couldn't be any more in love with him, but I will be...
Next week, tomorrow, even minutes from now.
I used to feel as if love was contained solely within my heart, but not with him;
With him, I am BECOMING love...
with my entire being.

If we take weeks
and wait for someone to tell us
“STOP”
the lights might dim,
and we might shut
our eyes
but…still…
this being we
become together
exists