Always put your worth before your feelings!

What am I?
I know the obvious answer is "human",
But I mean it in a more focused way.
What am I to you?
Am I the one whose heart you wish you never broke?
Or the one you wish would fade away for his own good?
Am I the one you kissed so much out of appreciation and maybe unspoken affection?
Or a sullen reminder of the things you may have thrown away?
Am I the sweet sullen soul with a constant smile on his face, who always saw the good in you, and was never angry when you didn't speak, for I was fluent in silence?
Or am I the angry and bitter soul with fire in his eyes, who voices his grave concern and disappointment with the roads you have taken?
Am I the friend you hold so dear, and swore to never let go?
Or am I just a secret now, and nothing more?
The answer is simple
As clear as day
I am not one or the other
I'm both
I'm the one you wish you never hurt, and wish would let you fade, but I'm still here.
I am the one you showed such grand affection to, but you try to downplay like it was nothing, because from here it seems you still feel pain for it all, but I'm still here.
I am happy and bright soul who knows the good you are and can do, but also the angry and sad one who looks on you and asks "What the hell are you doing to yourself?", but I'm still here.
I am still the friend you hold so dear, but also a secret you don't wish to have, because even though you hate lying to him you still do, but I'm still here.
And that shall always remain the same.
The yin and yang.
But one constant will always remain:
I'm still here.
Because to me, you were always worth it.

Something feels like its missing
Something feels like its gone
Something I wish was still here
Something I miss
It hurts knowing that you have the reason wrong
That you think it was all for love
When it wasn't and still isn't
Its because you are my friend
First and always
And I don't leave friends behind

i am
                                                                               okay
in
     fleeting
                   moments

but they always seem to escape me

It’s like a lightning storm during the night
How it blinds you and makes the night seem darker

Like an abyss

And when she rumbles
You can feel the vibrations
Before she deafens you

It’s such a destructive force
That when she finally hits
She tears everything apart

Whether she means to or not

And when she hits you
She burns you deep into your core
Rooting its way into everything

Everything you are
Everything you’re not
Everything you wish you could be

Mi madre siempre
loves me
when I don't deserve it
holds me
when I don't fit
sticks up for me
when other won't
hugs me
when others don't.

Mi madre siempre
makes sure i'm okay
even if we've fought
makes sure I eat
even when i'm not
makes sure I understand
even when I do
loves me more than anyone
it will forever be us two.

****. I’ve come undone in your arms. under your sweet breath. my back arches and i submit to each one of my little deaths. my thighs hold little worlds in them and you were born a voyageur, a vagabond. Feed to me my little deaths; these forbidden ecstasies. each one finding its way back into you, into you. and out again. This is where it ends, isn’t it?