It is
frightening
to think
that

my lack
of confidence
will
surely

be
The End
of
me

When
you
kiss
me

I
feel
so
beautiful

But
I
still
hurt

a lady lights a cigarette
glowing red cherry
lips, puffing without
regret
a cigarette, burning
smoking, grey breathing
choking and
tap tap the
falling ashes

it is over with
a definitive flick —
a lady lights a cigarette
she can see her spirit
dancing in the smoke

What does it feel like to be missed?
---
I often close
my eyes
and
just wonder:

What if
you could
see
what I see?

And realize
that you
really
miss me;

*Just as much as I miss you.

I'm feeling your hands
trickling like sand,
fingertips ticking
across my hour glass hips.
I'm feeling your lips
with its gentle kiss,
tickling my neck
and shoulder bits.
I'm feeling your chest
your heart beating so fast,
a tiny rib cage drum
making its music.
I'm feeling your love
the way it fills me up,
and like a tipping cup
it's too much.

*I'm feeling too much.

I'm really scared of the future;
especially now that time
is running away with my days.
I feel it as
the minutes match my heart beats,
and the seconds fly by
with each breath I take.
And it feels like I'm one step closer
towards some disaster
or another mistake;
that will do more than I planned for,
and bring about a change.